The Vent and Rant Thread

[BetterRed]

used to be top right, etc, etc.

I am forced to retrain my memory muscle - where do I send the bill

[poohbear_nc]

Originally Posted by CRussel

I feel for you! This won't heal it, but once the split closes, start using Udder Balm several times a day. It really is the best I've found. Isn't greasy, doesn't have any weird things in it that even chemists can't pronounce, and works into your skin completely, not leaving a tacky or oily feeling. (Yes, I was a chemist, working in the paint department of a major auto plant with all those solvents. And this stuff saved me.)

Thumb skin has finally closed over - still hurts - but my jar of Udder Balm is here and I will try it out tonight - thanks for reminding me of this - used to use it a LONG time ago when I lived in the Midwest - I owe you a dram of malt!

[CRussel]

Originally Posted by poohbear_nc

Thumb skin has finally closed over - still hurts - but my jar of Udder Balm is here and I will try it out tonight - thanks for reminding me of this - used to use it a LONG time ago when I lived in the Midwest - I owe you a dram of malt!

A wee dram is always appreciated! Tonight's will be the Oog, I think.

[Hemmi]

Finally got mine healed up a couple of days ago but now the right one is starting again.

[issybird]

Originally Posted by DNSB

It looks as if @Renate is looking for it under his account while @JSWolf is looking for it under a Search filter.

Surely Renate is female? She's got a woman's name.

[CRussel]

Surely these days I don't assume any gender unless specified.

Charlie. (he/him/his)

[DNSB]

Originally Posted by issybird

Surely Renate is female? She's got a woman's name.

I find it hard to make assumptions about gender based on names these days. Should I assume that Evelyn Waugh or Marion Wayne were women?

[issybird]

Originally Posted by DNSB

I find it hard to make assumptions about gender based on names these days. Should I assume that Evelyn Waugh or Marion Wayne were women?

That would be Marion Morrison.

The point is that you assumed Renate is a man, despite her name. In default of concrete knowledge, "these days" the best option is to avoid prescriptive pronouns. There are many and trivial workarounds. Or, shocker, go with the obvious, which most of the time will be the correct choice and it's understandable if you get it wrong.

Query: why choose to refer to someone with a woman's name with a masculine pronoun? Because she comes across as a man? The mind reels.

Would it have been so damned hard to have come back with a simple, "Sorry!" instead of doubling down on your mistake?

[ApK]

Originally Posted by issybird

Query: why choose to refer to someone with a woman's name with a masculine pronoun? Because she comes across as a man? The mind reels.

Just btw, I had never heard the name Renate other than here and had no idea it was typically a female name. In fact for second I thought you were joking about that.

I can't help but think of Firefly's Jayne Cobb in these situations.

[Renate]

Just to add an educational moment here:

Female names: Renate, Renata, Renee, Renée

Male names: Renato, Renatus, René

[DNSB]

Originally Posted by issybird

That would be Marion Morrison.

The point is that you assumed Renate is a man, despite her name. In default of concrete knowledge, "these days" the best option is to avoid prescriptive pronouns. There are many and trivial workarounds. Or, shocker, go with the obvious, which most of the time will be the correct choice and it's understandable if you get it wrong.

Query: why choose to refer to someone with a woman's name with a masculine pronoun? Because she comes across as a man? The mind reels.

I had never heard of the name Renate until I ran across it on MobileRead. Given the number of pseudonyms in use here, I made an assumption. I suppose I could have researched the name, made another assumption that it is a real name and not a pseudonym and used the "correct" pronoun. Or I could go with Hungarian and just use ő.

Originally Posted by issybird

Would it have been so damned hard to have come back with a simple, "Sorry!" instead of doubling down on your mistake?

IMNSHO, if @Renate wanted to complain about my misuse of pronouns, that is valid and I would expressed contrition. I have done so in past though most people seem to prefer to make such comments in private messages. I seem to have averaged about 50/50 on my incorrect gender assumptions.

A self-annointed member of the gender grammar Nazis? Not so much.

[Renate]

Originally Posted by DNSB

A self-annointed member of the gender grammar Nazis?

No, just a friend stepping in to provide clarity.

[DNSB]

Originally Posted by Renate

No, just a friend stepping in to provide clarity.

If you had complained about the incorrect pronoun I applied to you, I would have listened and apologized. A third party who, IMNSHO, seems overly concerned with minor errors committed by other people and who decided that calling me out in public was worth doing? Pretty damned unlikely.

If someone wants to make sure that incorrect pronouns are not used, adding preferred pronouns in a signature line is a one shot effort. Since I have also been criticized for using they/them/their/etc., a pox on all your houses.

[BetterRed]

Elton John married a Renate.

[Renate]

Originally Posted by BetterRed

Elton John married a Renate.

And speaking of Elton John, what the hell is with his song/video of "Nikita"?



"Nikita" is a man's name.