Kids say the darndest things...

[Taylor514ce]

Wonderful! I'll never think of ballet now without picturing pissing dogs. Well, since I never think of ballet it's likely to be the other way 'round: I'll never see a pissing dog without thinking of ballet. That's definitely karma-worthy. BOOST.

[vivaldirules]

Originally Posted by Taylor514ce

Wonderful! I'll never think of ballet now without picturing pissing dogs. Well, since I never think of ballet it's likely to be the other way 'round: I'll never see a pissing dog without thinking of ballet. That's definitely karma-worthy. BOOST.

I don't know why but this reminds me of a football game I was not paying attention to on television some years ago. I was doing something else at the time. But when I heard the announcer say something like "well, at least they're all holding their own", an image formed in my mind. Since then, whenever I hear the phrase "they're holding their own", that bizarre image returns.

[mores]

Originally Posted by vivaldirules

I don't know why but this reminds me of a football game I was not paying attention to on television some years ago. I was doing something else at the time. But when I heard the announcer say something like "well, at least they're all holding their own", an image formed in my mind. Since then, whenever I hear the phrase "they're holding their own", that bizarre image returns.

I guess that depends on what that something else was.
Or what you were holding, at the time.
Or I don't know what you're talking about, in that case I'd appreciate some further insights, possibly with illustrations or even photos!

[Taylor514ce]

[vivaldirules]

Right, something like that, Planet Head. I'm not sure we all really needed to see it, but, yeah, something like that.

[ProfJulie]

That's way too much for my tender eyes to see! Taylor did you take that picture? Be honest now!!

[mores]

notice how all those people are focused on everything except their own ... ?

And, it must be really cold!

[eBookNerd]

This one's a favorite of mine: I coached my 3 year old on Halloween etiquette in preparation for Trick or Treat;
Me - Now what do you say when they open the door son
3 year old - twick or tweat
Me -Now what do you say after you get your candy:
3 year old - tanks you
We had it down pat... on video and him sounding so cute!
We walked to the house next door and the little old lady answers the door. I think they were having cabbage for supper.
Me: - Now what do you say, son?
3 year old - What's that smell? Somebody made a poopie?

I almost expired on the spot.

[zelda_pinwheel]

i'm glad i wasn't drinking when i read that.

[igorsk]

Saw today on IRC.

<zepher> ok, how about this one...
<zepher> a friend of the family came by one day with her kids, and we were looking through family albums of when i was a kid..
<zepher> the kid asks "don't you have digital photos?"

I wonder if we'll be telling our grandkids how paper books looked like...

[Over]

Originally Posted by Taylor514ce

One child had the charming habit of picking up multisyllabic words and then using them randomly in conversation. When he described his dinner as "very sarcastic" once, I asked him if he knew what "sarcasm" was. He quickly answered, "well of course not". Of course not. Silly me.

For those of you who have become burned out on your endless Sudoku scribblings, here's a challenge: explain sarcasm to a young child. My attempt involved little Susie at the playground saying "Oh, I really like your shirt", but you knew she meant that she actually hated your shirt. Ah, the dawn of comprehension on a young boy's face!

Several days later, Mom was driving and someone cut her off. She honked and yelled, "Oh thanks a LOT!". From the back child's seat came the curious query, "Why'd you tell that car thanks?"

"I was just being sarcastic."

"Oh! I can't see his shirt from here."

Just try to explain a child the difference between sarcasm, cynicism and hypocrite.

[zelda_pinwheel]

Originally Posted by igorsk

I wonder if we'll be telling our grandkids how paper books looked like...

it would seem not unlikely...

[FizzyWater]

hat reminds me of when my son was 9yo. I'm another one who thinks that kids should know proper terms and how things work. He understood about the sperm and egg creating the baby but he asked me, "How does the sperm get to the egg?" I replied very clinically, "The man inserts his penis into the women's vagina." My poor son had the most horrified expression on his face and said, "I'm NEVER doing that!" I told him to come back in 10 years and tell me the same thing after I picked myself off the floor laughing.

I remember when I was getting the "where babies come from" talk from my mother. To give a little background, I remember this conversation from sometime in my 9th year, so at that time, I would have had three younger brothers. And bathrooms are just not private places when there are that many children!

When mom got to the "penis in the vagina" part of the conversation, I was utterly appalled. (I had seen the drip-dry method of clean-up used by my brothers after visiting the toilet). I, however, told my mother I was never allowing that because it was "too unsanitary"!

I remember a choked response that I would change my mind when I was older. My mother doesn't remember the conversation at all!

[RickyMaveety]

Originally Posted by Alexander Turcic

Before this turns into mud-wrestling, please remember we have the ignore feature. I heard it works rather well.

And I'm so glad you do!! I have already used it on one poster I found absolutely insuffereable. It is a great and amazing thing that ignore feature is ..... great and amazing.

[RickyMaveety]

Originally Posted by Taylor514ce

My children were taught the correct terms for, well, everything. I see no need in dumbing things down for kids, and think they actually could teach adults a thing or two. Ok, opening preachy opinion out of the way, that brings us to the funny part.

My son was playing catch with a kid from the neighborhood we'll call "Johnny". Poor Johnny took a fastball to a sensitive area, ending the game but leaving my son very confused. He confided later that something was very wrong with Johnny: he didn't have a penis! He peed out of a "bo-bo".

I'm not a big fan of children. Never have been and probably never will be, however, every once in a long while I am privy to one of "those" moments.

I was driving home from the beach with a friend, who has the same attitude about teaching children the correct terms for things. Which is fine ... just fine .... I just wish she had TOLD me about that before exposing me to her children.

Her son and daughter (about 5 and 4) were sitting in the back seat while the adults were up front. Suddenly, from the back I hear her daughter say "I don't like the beach so much. I always get sand in my vagina. Do you ever get sand up your penis??

Soda pop then began to spew out of my nose. I forget the rest of the day ... I went into a fugue state.