What is in your cup?

[VydorScope]

We just had our first 'fight'. Not really a fight, more a heated discussion. He wants to go out today. I want to stay home and finish Ghost Story. He couldn't understand me wanting to read a book so badly I would rather stay home than spend every minute of the day with him ... Sounds like we'll have plenty more of those discussion in the future

Originally Posted by Stitchawl

Nothing wrong with a good 'argument' so long as you finish it...
NEVER leave a 'problem' unresolved. NEVER! Talk it out or slug it out... but finish it before going to bed. "Leftovers" tend to rot...


Stitchawl

I agree, but you should aslo consider compromise in this kind of case. Work something out where sometimes you do what he wants, and sometimes you do what you want.

[orlok]

Originally Posted by Iridal

We just had our first 'fight'. Not really a fight, more a heated discussion. He wants to go out today. I want to stay home and finish Ghost Story. He couldn't understand me wanting to read a book so badly I would rather stay home than spend every minute of the day with him ... Sounds like we'll have plenty more of those discussion in the future

Compromise is good, sometimes, but don't just "give in" and do what he wants all the time. You'll end up losing your own individuality and a little of his respect.

Originally Posted by pdurrant

I immediately thought of this song:

One of my top ten ever. So poingnant.

[Iridal]

Thanks for all the advice guys We did compromise, I get to spend the day with my book, and he gets to spend the evening with me We're going out to the pub tonight to have a drink. Maybe watch a movie. He still doesn't understand though. He doesn't read. Ever.

In my cup: tap water

[orlok]

Originally Posted by Iridal

He doesn't read. Ever.

Mind you, my wife hardly ever read when we first started going out - now she reads every night, and has become a real book lover (as are all 3 of our girls), so my work on this earth is done .

Coffee in my justincapp mug.

[VydorScope]

Originally Posted by Iridal

Thanks for all the advice guys We did compromise, I get to spend the day with my book, and he gets to spend the evening with me We're going out to the pub tonight to have a drink. Maybe watch a movie. He still doesn't understand though. He doesn't read. Ever.

In my cup: tap water

Excellent solution. Successful relationships are built on give an take.

o... Ice Mocha Latte

[maianhvk]

Originally Posted by Iridal

He doesn't read. Ever.

it can't be! Does that mean we can never meet him here on MobileRead??

Originally Posted by VydorScope

Excellent solution. Successful relationships are built on give an take.

Have you ever read this by Fbone?

Originally Posted by Fbone

Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway.

[Phogg]

Cup of Bigelow Constant Comment.

[pdurrant]

Originally Posted by Iridal

He doesn't read. Ever.

Wow. While I know there are intelligent people who don't read for pleasure, I find it hard to imagine not doing so. One of my earliest school memories (age 7 or so) is hiding my (open) book between me and my desk so I could read it during lessons.


Oh - and Coke Zero in my cup. Although I did have some orange juice earlier.

[Stitchawl]

In the early mornin' rain
With a dollar in my hand
And an aching in my heart
And my -pockets full of sand
I'm a long ways from home
And I missed my loved one so
In the early mornin' rain
With no place to go

( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0OCnHNk2Hac )


Rainy morning... early... just 6:30 Must be Jet Lag waking me, even the cat is still asleep this morning. Gentle rain falling outside. (Good thing it's not falling inside, right?) I sorta wish I was back in Vermont. It's just so green... so empty of people....





Ah well... Time for a cup of good tea. Today will be East India Company's English Breakfast tea! Good brew along side a bowl of muesli! Then it's work, work, work! I have about 1,000 photos of the wedding, Vermont, and friends to work on. Gotta get the wrinkles off the eyes of all the wimmins or they'll haunt me forever! I'll take about 5 years off and they will be happy campers, never even realizing that it was done... just believing that they actually do look that young!

Originally Posted by orlok

Compromise is good, sometimes, but don't just "give in" and do what he wants all the time. You'll end up losing your own individuality and a little of his respect.

Not a damn thing wrong with sticking up for our own beliefs and desires... as long as we do so 'properly.'

Originally Posted by Iridal

Thanks for all the advice guys We did compromise, I get to spend the day with my book, and he gets to spend the evening with me

My first wife couldn't understand how I might want to do anything other than be with her!
She never did understand.... Some folks feel threatened by so many things! And no amount of discussion could ever help her to understand...

He still doesn't understand though. He doesn't read. Ever.

I'm sure that you can help him see the beauty of it all. Find a book that deals with his favorite pastimes, and try a one-hour 'let's both read together on a rainy afternoon.' If he succeeds in reading for the full hour, take him to the couch, kiss him until his brains melt and run out of his ears as a reward. This sort of Pavlovian Conditioning works really well with puppies, small children, and men.
Trust me... he'll ask when you can read together again!

Originally Posted by VydorScope

Excellent solution. Successful relationships are built on give an take.

Just so long as BOTH of you give and take...

Time for one more cup of tea!


Stitchawl

[The Terminator]

Earl grey tea with milk and sugar.

[DrDln]

It's empty. Just finished my coffee with milk and sugar.

[jaxx6166]

Aah..paradise. "Fresh" hot apple cider while listening to armageddon outside as the thunder rolls and the lightning strikes...

This is a nasty, nasty storm that damn near gave me a heart attack when I was out on the patio! *Jumps over to the weather thread to share*

[Iridal]

Originally Posted by maianhvk

it can't be! Does that mean we can never meet him here on MobileRead??

I'm afraid so ...

Originally Posted by pdurrant

Wow. While I know there are intelligent people who don't read for pleasure, I find it hard to imagine not doing so. One of my earliest school memories (age 7 or so) is hiding my (open) book between me and my desk so I could read it during lessons.

Oh - and Coke Zero in my cup. Although I did have some orange juice earlier.

Well, he's certainly not dumb. I guess it's because his parents don't read either. If you never see your parents enjoying a good book, it's easier to believe books can't be fun.

Originally Posted by Stitchawl

I'm sure that you can help him see the beauty of it all. Find a book that deals with his favorite pastimes, and try a one-hour 'let's both read together on a rainy afternoon.' If he succeeds in reading for the full hour, take him to the couch, kiss him until his brains melt and run out of his ears as a reward. This sort of Pavlovian Conditioning works really well with puppies, small children, and men.
Trust me... he'll ask when you can read together again!

Hehe, that's a great idea Stitchawl *goes off in search of an interesting book about cycling* Thanks

But first: a cup of Moccha macchiato

[pdurrant]

Originally Posted by Iridal

Hehe, that's a great idea Stitchawl *goes off in search of an interesting book about cycling* Thanks

Or perhaps the book that a favourite movie is based on?

Coke Zero #1 in my cup.

My stocks are getting low. It's time to see which supermarket has a BOGOF offer at the moment.

[Iridal]

Originally Posted by pdurrant

Or perhaps the book that a favourite movie is based on?

That's an even better idea! Thanks

One last glass of water and then I'm off for a visit to my parents. I've got lots to tell them I'm a little anxious about dad's reaction though. He hates it when I have a boyfriend ...