Silliness MARRIAGE SURVIVAL KIT

Greg Anos · 12-11-2008, 04:15 PM

And yes, I really did do this for a Lady Boss I had had when she got married, at the reception, to thunderous applause by all the guests. The marriage is still rolling along, bottle unopened....

Marriage Survival Kit

Contents

1 HIS package

1 HERS package

1 Bottle Fine Rum

Instructions for Use

Groom should open the HIS package

Inside he will find a gold coin with a queen on it. This is to remind him that the princess that he has now married is now his Queen. Queens are imperious and demanding. This is their ancient right. Having married your Queen, you are required to follow and obey her whims, no matter how strange they may seem. Although this is impossible for any husband to do, you are required to divine her thoughts, and obey them before she speaks.

Bride should open the HERS package

Inside she will find a gold coin with a king on it. This is to remind her that the knight in shining armor that has married her is now her King. Kings are dominating and decisive, and have the honorable, noble, and inalienable right to be wrong. This is their ancient right. Having married your King, you are required to allow him to be wrong, and not complain about it...
MUCH..

The Bottle of Fine Rum

Should either member of royalty decide that despite everything, they can no longer fulfill the requirements above, that person is required to swallow their wrath, sit down with the spouse, and share the contents of the Bottle of Rum, followed by several kisses, and let nature take it course. This should maintain a contented marriage for as long as their livers hold out.

P.S. The spouse who opened the Bottle is required to replace the empty for the next occurrence.

WARRANTY - If this doesn't work, the giver will accept the refund of the unused booze and both gold coins. He's cheap and greedy.

Copyright 2003 - Ralph Sir Edward

Slite · 12-11-2008, 04:17 PM

That, is just fraking brilliant!

DixieGal · 12-11-2008, 04:24 PM

That's really sweet.

For Tim and me, we try to always treat each other nicer than we would treat a stranger.

Think about it.

vivaldirules · 12-11-2008, 05:17 PM

Nicely done.

RickyMaveety · 12-11-2008, 06:34 PM

Cheap, greedy and a booze hound!!

Also a very good writer.

Greg Anos · 12-11-2008, 07:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RickyMaveety

Cheap, greedy and a booze hound!!

Also a very good writer.

Quiet, I have an image to maintain.

Cheap, greedy and a booze hound!!

RWood · 12-11-2008, 08:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ralph Sir Edward

Quiet, I have an image to maintain. ...

Writer, waiter, whatever.

Johns1NOnly · 12-11-2008, 08:42 PM

love it!! just how a marriage should be than for sharing

12-11-2008, 04:15 PM	#1
Greg Anos Grand Sorcerer Posts: 11,546 Karma: 37057604 Join Date: Jan 2008 Device: Pocketbook	MARRIAGE SURVIVAL KIT And yes, I really did do this for a Lady Boss I had had when she got married, at the reception, to thunderous applause by all the guests. The marriage is still rolling along, bottle unopened.... *Marriage Survival Kit* Contents 1 HIS package 1 HERS package 1 Bottle Fine Rum Instructions for Use Groom should open the HIS package Inside he will find a gold coin with a queen on it. This is to remind him that the princess that he has now married is now his Queen. Queens are imperious and demanding. This is their ancient right. Having married your Queen, you are required to follow and obey her whims, no matter how strange they may seem. Although this is impossible for any husband to do, you are required to divine her thoughts, and obey them before she speaks. Bride should open the HERS package Inside she will find a gold coin with a king on it. This is to remind her that the knight in shining armor that has married her is now her King. Kings are dominating and decisive, and have the honorable, noble, and inalienable right to be wrong. This is their ancient right. Having married your King, you are required to allow him to be wrong, and not complain about it... MUCH.. The Bottle of Fine Rum Should either member of royalty decide that despite everything, they can no longer fulfill the requirements above, that person is required to swallow their wrath, sit down with the spouse, and share the contents of the Bottle of Rum, followed by several kisses, and let nature take it course. This should maintain a contented marriage for as long as their livers hold out. P.S. The spouse who opened the Bottle is required to replace the empty for the next occurrence. WARRANTY - If this doesn't work, the giver will accept the refund of the unused booze and both gold coins. He's cheap and greedy. Copyright 2003 - Ralph Sir Edward Last edited by Greg Anos; 12-11-2008 at 04:17 PM.

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12-11-2008, 04:17 PM	#2
Slite Icanhasdonuts? Posts: 2,837 Karma: 532407 Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: Mölnbo, Sweden Device: Kobo Aura 2nd edition, Kobo Clara HD	That, is just fraking brilliant!

12-11-2008, 04:24 PM	#3
DixieGal Hi There! Posts: 7,473 Karma: 2930523 Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Ft Lauderdale Device: iPad	That's really sweet. For Tim and me, we try to always treat each other nicer than we would treat a stranger. Think about it.

12-11-2008, 05:17 PM	#4
vivaldirules When's Doughnut Day? Posts: 10,059 Karma: 13675475 Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Houston, TX, US Device: Sony PRS-505, iPad	Nicely done.

12-11-2008, 06:34 PM	#5
RickyMaveety Holy S**T!!! Posts: 5,213 Karma: 108401 Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: San Diego, California!! Device: Kindle and iPad	Cheap, greedy and a booze hound!! Also a very good writer.

12-11-2008, 08:42 PM	#8
Johns1NOnly Loves2Design <3 Posts: 103 Karma: 108 Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: in my own dreamworld somewhere in Virginia Device: Sony PRS-505, Ipad, Kindle DX	love it!! just how a marriage should be than for sharing

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