Register Guidelines E-Books Today's Posts Search

Go Back   MobileRead Forums > E-Book General > Writers' Corner

Notices

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 05-19-2010, 06:19 AM   #601
beppe
Grand Sorcerer
beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
Posts: 5,161
Karma: 81026524
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Italy
Device: Kindle3, Ipod4, IPad2
Quote:
Originally Posted by GeoffC View Post
.... didn't intend

(I know - that's the beauty of what I try to do - evoke the readers' own responses - hence no title for this one (yet))....
I never thought - up to now - that you had an inclination for futurism. Quite unconscious of course. Unconsciousness being induced by controlled deprivation of chocolate

Last edited by beppe; 05-19-2010 at 06:23 AM.
beppe is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2010, 06:21 AM   #602
GeoffC
Chocolate Grasshopper ...
GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
GeoffC's Avatar
 
Posts: 27,599
Karma: 20821184
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Scotland
Device: Muse HD , Cybook Gen3 , Pocketbook 302 (Black) , Nexus 10: wife has PW
yes - the chocolate is strictly rationed ....
GeoffC is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2010, 06:28 AM   #603
beppe
Grand Sorcerer
beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
Posts: 5,161
Karma: 81026524
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Italy
Device: Kindle3, Ipod4, IPad2
Quote:
Originally Posted by GeoffC View Post
yes - the chocolate is strictly rationed ....
wel, the results are not bad. Not at all. and Less choco for you, more choco for me.
It's a new law of conservation that I just invented.
beppe is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2010, 06:31 AM   #604
GeoffC
Chocolate Grasshopper ...
GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
GeoffC's Avatar
 
Posts: 27,599
Karma: 20821184
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Scotland
Device: Muse HD , Cybook Gen3 , Pocketbook 302 (Black) , Nexus 10: wife has PW
no it doesn't work like that !

I have all the chocolate - it's what's left that I leave to you ...
GeoffC is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2010, 06:52 AM   #605
beppe
Grand Sorcerer
beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
Posts: 5,161
Karma: 81026524
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Italy
Device: Kindle3, Ipod4, IPad2
Quote:
Originally Posted by GeoffC View Post
no it doesn't work like that !

I have all the chocolate - it's what's left that I leave to you ...
An original and authentic expession of Futurism.

OK, I will modify the conservation law accordingly and generalize it. Which now reads: What is mine is yours and what is yours also. In this way we can also conserve symmetry. And parity.

You get a scare eh?

In real life I like choco, but not as much as LittleDaughter. Her daily intake, strictly limited to early morning. is steadily increasing. This morning she wanted the whole new tablet. 8 minutes of uninterrupted crying. In the general indifference.
beppe is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2010, 08:34 AM   #606
WT Sharpe
Bah, humbug!
WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
WT Sharpe's Avatar
 
Posts: 39,072
Karma: 157049943
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Chesapeake, VA, USA
Device: Kindle Oasis, iPad Pro, & a Samsung Galaxy S9.
Geoff, this recent untitled poem of yours is very intriguing. I love the flow and the word play, even if I must confess to being somewhat baffled as to its meaning. It seems to be describing a comet, but surely one whose approach is extremely close to our own sphere if it "reflects its light, both day and night." The "Fiery" comet of 1014, perhaps?
WT Sharpe is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2010, 01:02 PM   #607
GeoffC
Chocolate Grasshopper ...
GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
GeoffC's Avatar
 
Posts: 27,599
Karma: 20821184
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Scotland
Device: Muse HD , Cybook Gen3 , Pocketbook 302 (Black) , Nexus 10: wife has PW
(only way I can find to post this, as an image ..... )

To be read either down and / or across ....

GeoffC is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2010, 01:45 PM   #608
dreams
It's about the umbrella
dreams ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.dreams ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.dreams ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.dreams ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.dreams ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.dreams ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.dreams ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.dreams ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.dreams ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.dreams ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.dreams ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
dreams's Avatar
 
Posts: 25,110
Karma: 56250158
Join Date: Jan 2009
Device: Sony 505| K Fire | KK 3G+Wi-Fi | iPhone 3Gs |Vista 32-bit Hm Prem w/FF
GeoffC

I'm still trying to figure out the first one, but this last one is interesting in how it can be read either down or across.

After reading it both ways a few times, I think I like it best when read across the page.

As to the first one... I keep changing what it means to me. The first time through I visualized the sun and moon, but the last part didn't fit. Then I added in the Earth and breaking free of current orbit, moving through the fabric of space, and being caught in orbit around another thus becoming a "moon".. (Whoa, too much History Channel, for me. )

GeoffC I to you, for although I like the feel of the second, your first has caused me to linger searching for meaning.
dreams is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2010, 01:57 PM   #609
GeoffC
Chocolate Grasshopper ...
GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
GeoffC's Avatar
 
Posts: 27,599
Karma: 20821184
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Scotland
Device: Muse HD , Cybook Gen3 , Pocketbook 302 (Black) , Nexus 10: wife has PW
I shall provide a title in due course, or at least provide my take on the meaning.

I particularly like the numerous 'takes' that have been suggested , It shows me that I am doing what I aim to, and that is invoke the readers' emotions (rightly or wrongly) ...

Also shows, I think, the power that a title has on a poem ....
GeoffC is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2010, 02:41 PM   #610
beppe
Grand Sorcerer
beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
Posts: 5,161
Karma: 81026524
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Italy
Device: Kindle3, Ipod4, IPad2
Quote:
Originally Posted by GeoffC View Post
I shall provide a title in due course, or at least provide my take on the meaning.

I particularly like the numerous 'takes' that have been suggested , It shows me that I am doing what I aim to, and that is invoke the readers' emotions (rightly or wrongly) ...

Also shows, I think, the power that a title has on a poem ....
Ah Ah we are being de-structuralists now. Title, I'll give you a title right away. Sir Geoff. How do you like that.

Is the second one yours? Just answer yes or no, you sneaky Briton. Please

My comment to follow.

Since the mighty Dreams came into the game I feel much more confident. Ah.
beppe is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2010, 03:05 PM   #611
beppe
Grand Sorcerer
beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
Posts: 5,161
Karma: 81026524
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Italy
Device: Kindle3, Ipod4, IPad2
wrong post, sorry.

Last edited by beppe; 05-19-2010 at 03:22 PM. Reason: wrong post
beppe is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2010, 03:52 PM   #612
GeoffC
Chocolate Grasshopper ...
GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.GeoffC ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
GeoffC's Avatar
 
Posts: 27,599
Karma: 20821184
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Scotland
Device: Muse HD , Cybook Gen3 , Pocketbook 302 (Black) , Nexus 10: wife has PW
You doubt the second one is mine ?

Cheeky .....

Of course it is .....


Now ? why do you ask ?
GeoffC is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2010, 04:38 PM   #613
beppe
Grand Sorcerer
beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.beppe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
Posts: 5,161
Karma: 81026524
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Italy
Device: Kindle3, Ipod4, IPad2
Quote:
Originally Posted by GeoffC View Post
You doubt the second one is mine ?

Cheeky .....

Of course it is .....


Now ? why do you ask ?
No, I did not doubt or assume. I just waited to look at it to be sure that it was by you. Please forgive me if in any way I upset you.That was not my intention at all.

It is beautiful, the trick is so well hidden in the craft. The two poems stand up by themselves and merge continuously verse by verse. Becoming one. the main symbol, the disclosed gem. It will take some careful reading and playing with it for me to drink it with great pleasure, and recognize the flavors and how they play on each other.

That could well be a druidic marriage song. I will keep it for my LD, because it is warm and pure.
beppe is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2010, 05:16 PM   #614
badgoodDeb
Grand Sorcerer
badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.badgoodDeb ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
badgoodDeb's Avatar
 
Posts: 8,553
Karma: 64462893
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Harrisburg outskirts
Device: Palms, K1-4s, iPads, iPhones, KV, KO1
The 3 verse poem (the earlier one) brings to my mind thoughts of glacier(s).
badgoodDeb is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2010, 05:22 PM   #615
WT Sharpe
Bah, humbug!
WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.WT Sharpe ought to be getting tired of karma fortunes by now.
 
WT Sharpe's Avatar
 
Posts: 39,072
Karma: 157049943
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Chesapeake, VA, USA
Device: Kindle Oasis, iPad Pro, & a Samsung Galaxy S9.
Quote:
Originally Posted by badgoodDeb View Post
The 3 verse poem (the earlier one) brings to my mind thoughts of glacier(s).
I can see that.
WT Sharpe is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
poetry, squirrelku


Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Poetry Tuesday? Stitchawl Lounge 5 10-06-2009 07:46 AM
Got POETRY? Dr. Drib Writers' Corner 36 04-02-2009 11:18 AM
Poetry recommendations? ficbot Reading Recommendations 1 03-14-2009 12:19 PM
Unutterably Silly Not User Poetry Dr. Drib Lounge 7 11-16-2008 12:57 PM
Poetry by committee GeoffC Lounge 34 06-06-2008 07:13 PM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 03:38 AM.


MobileRead.com is a privately owned, operated and funded community.