Silliness Add/Read a good joke to lighten your day - Page 60

garbanzo · 03-18-2010, 09:17 AM

what's brown and sticky?

Spoiler:

happy_terd · 03-18-2010, 07:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by garbanzo

what's brown and sticky?

Spoiler:

LOL

kennyc · 03-18-2010, 08:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by garbanzo

what's brown and sticky?

Spoiler:

montsnmags · 03-19-2010, 02:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by garbanzo

what's brown and sticky?

Spoiler:

What do you call a non-returning boomerang?

Spoiler:

CyGuy · 03-19-2010, 08:33 AM

There was a penguin on a cross America driving tour -- it was slow in the Antarctic, was on his annual vacation. When he was in Arizona, the penguin saw his oil light come on and decided that he'd best get it looked at. He stopped at a garage and they told him to come back in a half an hour so they could look at it. The penguin then walked up the street, and he spotted an ice cream store. To a penguin in the desert, nothing sounded better than ice cream. So he went in and ordered a big bowl of vanilla ice cream. Unfortunately, the penguin didn't have hands, he only had flippers, so he really made a mess of things. He then noticed that it was time to go back to the garage. The penguin waddled back up the street to the garage and the mechanic said "Well, it looks like you blew a seal."
"No," the penguin replied, "it's only ice cream."

Wetdogeared · 03-19-2010, 09:12 AM

Made me laugh outl oud. And that's not easy to do lately.

poohbear_nc · 03-19-2010, 09:14 AM

Oh the mental image! Make it go away!

yvanleterrible · 03-19-2010, 09:29 AM

I needed something stronger than the pain. That did it nicely!

tirsales · 03-19-2010, 09:32 AM

Yeah .. thanks. Now I got stared at at the office.
Totally worth it though

kennyc · 03-19-2010, 10:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CyGuy

There was a penguin on a cross America driving ....
"No," the penguin replied, "it's only ice cream."

OMG!

CyGuy · 03-19-2010, 12:52 PM

Did you hear the one about the cannibal who dumped his girlfriend?

Oh man, the moderators are gonna get me.

Wetdogeared · 03-19-2010, 01:40 PM

Two days late...

A frog goes into a bank and

approaches the teller. He

can see from her nameplate

that her name is Patricia

Whack.

"Miss Whack, I'd like to get

a $30,000 loan to take a

holiday."

Patty looks at the frog in

disbelief and asks his name.

The frog says his name is

Kermit Jagger, his dad is

Mick Jagger, and that it's

okay, he knows the bank

manager.

Patty explains that he will

need to secure the loan with

some collateral.

The frog says, "Sure. I have

this," and produces a tiny

porcelain elephant, about an

inch tall, bright pink and

perfectly formed.

Very confused, Patty explains

that she'll have to consult

with the bank manager and

disappears into a back office.

She finds the manager and

says, "There's a frog called

Kermit Jagger out there who

claims to know you and wants

to borrow $30,000, and he

wants to use this as

collateral."

She holds up the tiny pink

elephant. "I mean, what in

the world is this?"

The bank manager looks back

at her and says.

"It's a knickknack, Patty

Whack. Give the frog a loan,

His old man's a Rolling

Stone."

pshrynk · 03-19-2010, 01:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wetdogeared

Two days late...

A frog goes into a bank and

approaches the teller. He

can see from her nameplate

that her name is Patricia

Whack.

"Miss Whack, I'd like to get

a $30,000 loan to take a

holiday."

Patty looks at the frog in

disbelief and asks his name.

The frog says his name is

Kermit Jagger, his dad is

Mick Jagger, and that it's

okay, he knows the bank

manager.

Patty explains that he will

need to secure the loan with

some collateral.

The frog says, "Sure. I have

this," and produces a tiny

porcelain elephant, about an

inch tall, bright pink and

perfectly formed.

Very confused, Patty explains

that she'll have to consult

with the bank manager and

disappears into a back office.

She finds the manager and

says, "There's a frog called

Kermit Jagger out there who

claims to know you and wants

to borrow $30,000, and he

wants to use this as

collateral."

She holds up the tiny pink

elephant. "I mean, what in

the world is this?"

The bank manager looks back

at her and says.

"It's a knickknack, Patty

Whack. Give the frog a loan,

His old man's a Rolling

Stone."

**sigh**

Hand me that nine iron, would ya?

Wetdogeared · 03-19-2010, 01:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pshrynk

**sigh**

Hand me that nine iron, would ya?

[whine]BOb, pshrynky's being mean again. [/whine]

Lady Blue · 03-19-2010, 02:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wetdogeared

Two days late...

A frog goes into a bank and

approaches the teller. He

can see from her nameplate

that her name is Patricia

Whack.

"Miss Whack, I'd like to get

a $30,000 loan to take a

holiday."

Patty looks at the frog in

disbelief and asks his name.

The frog says his name is

Kermit Jagger, his dad is

Mick Jagger, and that it's

okay, he knows the bank

manager.

Patty explains that he will

need to secure the loan with

some collateral.

The frog says, "Sure. I have

this," and produces a tiny

porcelain elephant, about an

inch tall, bright pink and

perfectly formed.

Very confused, Patty explains

that she'll have to consult

with the bank manager and

disappears into a back office.

She finds the manager and

says, "There's a frog called

Kermit Jagger out there who

claims to know you and wants

to borrow $30,000, and he

wants to use this as

collateral."

She holds up the tiny pink

elephant. "I mean, what in

the world is this?"

The bank manager looks back

at her and says.

"It's a knickknack, Patty

Whack. Give the frog a loan,

His old man's a Rolling

Stone."

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03-18-2010, 09:17 AM	#886
garbanzo bean Posts: 82 Karma: 338 Join Date: Feb 2010 Device: Boox Nova 2	what's brown and sticky? Spoiler: a stick

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03-19-2010, 08:33 AM	#890
CyGuy Avid Reader Posts: 769 Karma: 7777778 Join Date: Aug 2009 Device: PocketBook 902, Galaxy Tab 2 7.0, ASUS TF700, and Cybook Gen III	There was a penguin on a cross America driving tour -- it was slow in the Antarctic, was on his annual vacation. When he was in Arizona, the penguin saw his oil light come on and decided that he'd best get it looked at. He stopped at a garage and they told him to come back in a half an hour so they could look at it. The penguin then walked up the street, and he spotted an ice cream store. To a penguin in the desert, nothing sounded better than ice cream. So he went in and ordered a big bowl of vanilla ice cream. Unfortunately, the penguin didn't have hands, he only had flippers, so he really made a mess of things. He then noticed that it was time to go back to the garage. The penguin waddled back up the street to the garage and the mechanic said "Well, it looks like you blew a seal." "No," the penguin replied, "it's only ice cream."

03-19-2010, 09:12 AM	#891
Wetdogeared Storm Surge'n Posts: 5,780 Karma: 8213195 Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Polar Vortex Device: S0ny PRS-300/350/505/700/T1	Made me laugh outl oud. And that's not easy to do lately.

03-19-2010, 09:14 AM	#892
poohbear_nc Bah! Humbug! Posts: 63,538 Karma: 135239851 Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Durham, NC Device: Every Kindle Ever Made & To Be Made!	Oh the mental image! Make it go away!

03-19-2010, 09:29 AM	#893
yvanleterrible Reborn Paper User Posts: 8,616 Karma: 15446734 Join Date: May 2006 Location: Que Nada Device: iPhone8, iPad Air	I needed something stronger than the pain. That did it nicely!

03-19-2010, 09:32 AM	#894
tirsales MIA ... but returning som Posts: 1,600 Karma: 511342 Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Germany Device: PRS-505 and Really not owning a PRS-700	Yeah .. thanks. Now I got stared at at the office. Totally worth it though

03-19-2010, 12:52 PM	#896
CyGuy Avid Reader Posts: 769 Karma: 7777778 Join Date: Aug 2009 Device: PocketBook 902, Galaxy Tab 2 7.0, ASUS TF700, and Cybook Gen III	Did you hear the one about the cannibal who dumped his girlfriend? Oh man, the moderators are gonna get me.

03-19-2010, 01:40 PM	#897
Wetdogeared Storm Surge'n Posts: 5,780 Karma: 8213195 Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Polar Vortex Device: S0ny PRS-300/350/505/700/T1	Two days late... A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack. "Miss Whack, I'd like to get a $30,000 loan to take a holiday." Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's okay, he knows the bank manager. Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral. The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny porcelain elephant, about an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed. Very confused, Patty explains that she'll have to consult with the bank manager and disappears into a back office. She finds the manager and says, "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000, and he wants to use this as collateral." She holds up the tiny pink elephant. "I mean, what in the world is this?" The bank manager looks back at her and says. "It's a knickknack, Patty Whack. Give the frog a loan, His old man's a Rolling Stone."