Silliness So what are you doing RIGHT NOW? - Page 501

DixieGal · 08-28-2009, 01:41 PM

Seriously, not kidding, that pic is making my heart pound in fright! Quick, somebody post a LolCat!!!

DixieGal · 08-28-2009, 01:43 PM

So Zelda, were any of the construction guys hot and juicy? Or just hot and sweaty.

zelda_pinwheel · 08-28-2009, 01:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DixieGal

Seriously, not kidding, that pic is making my heart pound in fright! Quick, somebody post a LolCat!!!

just think how i feel !!! (just like that, only eleventy BILLION times worse !!!)

Quote:

Originally Posted by DixieGal

So Zelda, were any of the construction guys hot and juicy? Or just hot and sweaty.

sadly, mostly hot and dusty. actually, just dusty. (and you know what ? i did not even care about that when i told him to go right ahead and climb up on my bed to catch it. i can wash that quilt, no problem. desperate times, desperate measures, and all that, you know ?).

zelda_pinwheel · 08-28-2009, 01:46 PM

i second the request for a lolcat. i'm such a wreck i can't even manage to go find one myself right now.

help !

griffonwing · 08-28-2009, 01:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by zelda_pinwheel

YEAH !!!!!! WHERE WERE YOU ? HUH ???

Sadly, you never called for me. Otherwise, you know I'd be there

vivaldirules · 08-28-2009, 01:52 PM

You know........oh, well, maybe you don't want to hear it. I was thinking of this sure-fire way I had heard to get spiders to go away and never come back. And it doesn't invovle hurting them or getting close to them. Naw, you probably don't want to know.

zelda_pinwheel · 08-28-2009, 01:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vivaldirules

You know........oh, well, maybe you don't want to hear it. I was thinking of this sure-fire way to get spiders to go away and never come back. And it doesn't invovle hurting them or getting close to them. Naw, you probably don't want to know.

TELL ME !!!!! TELL ME NOW !!!!!

vivaldirules · 08-28-2009, 01:56 PM

Well, okay. But only because you insist. It's pretty easy, actually. You just play "Dancing Queen" as loud as you can on infinite loop. Works every time. (or maybe it's just that the hoomin victims are never heard from again; one or the other)

zelda_pinwheel · 08-28-2009, 02:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vivaldirules

Well, okay. But only because you insist. It's pretty easy, actually. You just play "Dancing Queen" as loud as you can on infinite loop. Works every time. (or maybe it's just that the hoomin victims are never heard from again; one or the other)

and now i'm faced with the sticky situation of trying to figure out the lesser of two evils.

vivaldirules · 08-28-2009, 02:06 PM

Three easy solutions. I'd choose the first one.

1 - If you're reasonably careful, he's really not likely to bite you so just overcome your primeval fear somehow and put him in a bag, box, jar, or other container and take him outside and let him go.

2 - Swat him with something and squish him (or flush him).

3 - Open your window, yell FIRE! FIRE! and when someone shows up, kindly invite them in for a drink and then plead with them to help you. They will then proceed to do either #1 or #2 (or possibly repeat #3).

Problem solved. Next crisis, please.

vivaldirules · 08-28-2009, 02:11 PM

Oh, and if you go with option #3, be sure not to give them the drink (or play ABBA) until after the job's done. Spider eradication first, then Zany Carters (or Dancing Queen).

zelda_pinwheel · 08-28-2009, 02:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vivaldirules

Three easy solutions. I'd choose the first one.

1 - If you're reasonably careful, he's really not likely to bite you so just overcome your primeval fear somehow and put him in a bag, box, jar, or other container and take him outside and let him go.

2 - Swat him with something and squish him (or flush him).

3 - Open your window, yell FIRE! FIRE! and when someone shows up, kindly invite them in for a drink and then plead with them to help you. They will then proceed to do either #1 or #2 (or possibly repeat #3).

Problem solved. Next crisis, please.

see, with a normal size spider, despite my primeval (and therefore not overcomeable) fear, i usually manage #1, if there is no-one nearby i can plead with to do it for me. i'm really not comfortable with number 2 ; they may give me the screaming willies but that doesn't mean i have the right to kill them. but with a farking mutant creature from hell such as i was faced with today, i could barely be in the same room with the thing, much less get close enough to catch it. i'm just not capable of it. i know, i'm weak.

i hope you won't hold it against me.

thus, my improvised variant on number 3 today.

zelda_pinwheel · 08-28-2009, 02:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vivaldirules

Oh, and if you go with option #3, be sure not to give them the drink (or play ABBA) until after the job's done. Spider eradication first, then Zany Carters (or Dancing Queen).

oh trust me, when it comes to spiders, my priorities are very firmly in place !!! and who could relax with a zany carter knowing something like that is in the vicinity, anyway ?????

vivaldirules · 08-28-2009, 02:33 PM

Primeval = not rational.

Well, maybe they are sometimes but they can be overcome in a good emergency. So you know that wonderful little song with the finger thing that you were taught when you were a child about the Itsy Bitsy Spider? (I know what you're thinking - "There's nothing itsy bitsy about it!". But never mind that.) So you first calm yourself by sitting back, closing your eyes, and singing that tune a few times while playing the finger game that goes with it. Then, you roll up a newspaper and also find a container with a lid. Do that while you continue to sing the song about the sweet little spider. When you're ready, keeping singing the song and approach the spider and swat him (but not too hard) so that he falls to the floor and is momentarily disabled. Then scoop him up with the newspaper and plop him into the container.

Problem solved. Next crisis, please.

Sweetpea · 08-28-2009, 02:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by zelda_pinwheel

while i was waiting for him to climb the stairs (and keeping an eye on it from a safe distance so it couldn't get away, because seriously i could not have stayed here knowing it was loose somewhere) i took a photo of it so you can share my terror (because a burden shared is half as heavy, right ?) so, for the faint-hearted amongst you, DON'T LOOK AT THE PICTURE !!!! bear in mind, that photo was taken from the other side of the room, with a cell-phone camera. and i did not enlarge it AT ALL (juste cropped out the rest). seriously, almost 10cm across.

now of course i'm going to be jumping at every shadow and afraid to go to bed tonight in case it was actually just the little brother of a farking entire family. i think i may die. what the hell is the point of living in a city if you still get a spider like that IN YOUR HOME ????? for god's sake, THAT is why i don't want to live in the bleeding country !!!!! oh my god. i may never recover. i think half my hair went white at the sight of it. somebody get me a whisky, or maybe some morphine, or something.

Yep, that's a decent sized spider... Just like the one my cats ate the other day (after I managed to get it off the wall, using a broomstick...)

Quote:

Originally Posted by zelda_pinwheel

i second the request for a lolcat. i'm such a wreck i can't even manage to go find one myself right now.

help !

Ok, you ask and we deliver!

Wait! I found a better one!

08-28-2009, 01:41 PM	#7501
DixieGal Hi There! Posts: 7,473 Karma: 2930523 Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Ft Lauderdale Device: iPad	Seriously, not kidding, that pic is making my heart pound in fright! Quick, somebody post a LolCat!!!

08-28-2009, 01:43 PM	#7502
DixieGal Hi There! Posts: 7,473 Karma: 2930523 Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Ft Lauderdale Device: iPad	So Zelda, were any of the construction guys hot and juicy? Or just hot and sweaty.

08-28-2009, 01:46 PM	#7504
zelda_pinwheel zeldinha zippy zeldissima Posts: 27,827 Karma: 921169 Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Paris, France Device: eb1150 & is that a nook in her pocket, or she just happy to see you?	i second the request for a lolcat. i'm such a wreck i can't even manage to go find one myself right now. help !

08-28-2009, 01:52 PM	#7506
vivaldirules When's Doughnut Day? Posts: 10,059 Karma: 13675475 Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Houston, TX, US Device: Sony PRS-505, iPad	You know........oh, well, maybe you don't want to hear it. I was thinking of this sure-fire way I had heard to get spiders to go away and never come back. And it doesn't invovle hurting them or getting close to them. Naw, you probably don't want to know.

08-28-2009, 01:56 PM	#7508
vivaldirules When's Doughnut Day? Posts: 10,059 Karma: 13675475 Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Houston, TX, US Device: Sony PRS-505, iPad	Well, okay. But only because you insist. It's pretty easy, actually. You just play "Dancing Queen" as loud as you can on infinite loop. Works every time. (or maybe it's just that the hoomin victims are never heard from again; one or the other)

08-28-2009, 02:06 PM	#7510
vivaldirules When's Doughnut Day? Posts: 10,059 Karma: 13675475 Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Houston, TX, US Device: Sony PRS-505, iPad	Three easy solutions. I'd choose the first one. 1 - If you're reasonably careful, he's really not likely to bite you so just overcome your primeval fear somehow and put him in a bag, box, jar, or other container and take him outside and let him go. 2 - Swat him with something and squish him (or flush him). 3 - Open your window, yell FIRE! FIRE! and when someone shows up, kindly invite them in for a drink and then plead with them to help you. They will then proceed to do either #1 or #2 (or possibly repeat #3). Problem solved. Next crisis, please.

08-28-2009, 02:11 PM	#7511
vivaldirules When's Doughnut Day? Posts: 10,059 Karma: 13675475 Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Houston, TX, US Device: Sony PRS-505, iPad	Oh, and if you go with option #3, be sure not to give them the drink (or play ABBA) until after the job's done. Spider eradication first, then Zany Carters (or Dancing Queen).

08-28-2009, 02:33 PM	#7514
vivaldirules When's Doughnut Day? Posts: 10,059 Karma: 13675475 Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Houston, TX, US Device: Sony PRS-505, iPad	Primeval = not rational. Well, maybe they are sometimes but they can be overcome in a good emergency. So you know that wonderful little song with the finger thing that you were taught when you were a child about the Itsy Bitsy Spider? (I know what you're thinking - "There's nothing itsy bitsy about it!". But never mind that.) So you first calm yourself by sitting back, closing your eyes, and singing that tune a few times while playing the finger game that goes with it. Then, you roll up a newspaper and also find a container with a lid. Do that while you continue to sing the song about the sweet little spider. When you're ready, keeping singing the song and approach the spider and swat him (but not too hard) so that he falls to the floor and is momentarily disabled. Then scoop him up with the newspaper and plop him into the container. Problem solved. Next crisis, please.