Silliness Terrible Jokes - Page 51

ownedbycats · 12-05-2025, 11:14 AM

A famous chocolate company developed a new product with 50% less moisture.

It was called Dryer Lindt.

DNSB · 12-05-2025, 02:28 PM

Good one!

Did you hear about the guy who ate six cans of alphabet soup? He had the biggest vowel movement ever.

DNSB · 12-05-2025, 08:25 PM

I before e, except when a weird but conscientious scientist like Einstein deigns to reimburse the concierge for the counterfeit eiderdown pillow or you run a feisty heist on a weird beige foreign neighbour!

DNSB · 12-08-2025, 09:02 PM

Silence is golden... Unless you have a toddler, in which case silence is very, very suspicious.

Something which my granddaughters make me very aware of.

Sirtel · 12-11-2025, 08:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DNSB

Silence is golden... Unless you have a toddler, in which case silence is very, very suspicious.

Something which my granddaughters make me very aware of.

A cozy evening in the family home. Comfort. Peace. Quiet.

The mother tells the daughter, "Go see what the little Johnny is doing there and tell him to stop."

DNSB · 12-11-2025, 07:26 PM

Did you hear about the group of boats which crushed each other against their mooring structure? Yet more casualties of pier pressure.

JSWolf · 12-11-2025, 07:29 PM

I'm so good at sleeping, I can do it with my eyes shut.

DNSB · 12-11-2025, 07:31 PM

Scientists have finally discovered exactly how much sleep a human needs. “Just five minutes more.”

ownedbycats · 12-12-2025, 05:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DNSB

Did you hear about the group of boats which crushed each other against their mooring structure? Yet more casualties of pier pressure.

A ship carrying black paint collided with another ship carrying red paint. Both crews were marooned.

Fbone · 12-12-2025, 09:50 PM

I wonder if the arachnophobia support group has a web site.

ownedbycats · 12-17-2025, 11:29 AM

What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?

"Supplies!"

DNSB · 12-18-2025, 12:59 AM

Today at my local grocery store, they were playing the 80’s “I bless the rains down in Africa” song, which is now ruthlessly stuck in my head. At least they had good bread, so it wasn’t a Toto loss.

BTW, shouldn't it be red and blue for maroon? <snicker>

ownedbycats · 12-18-2025, 05:54 AM

DNSB · 12-19-2025, 06:30 AM

Why did the ghost cross the road? To get to the Other Side

ownedbycats · 12-20-2025, 12:35 PM

My new sweater had too much static electricity, so I returned it. They gave me another one free of charge.

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12-05-2025, 11:14 AM	#751
ownedbycats Custom User Title Posts: 11,595 Karma: 81412473 Join Date: Oct 2018 Location: Canada Device: Kobo Libra H2O, formerly Aura HD	A famous chocolate company developed a new product with 50% less moisture. It was called Dryer Lindt.

12-05-2025, 02:28 PM	#752
DNSB Bibliophagist Posts: 50,691 Karma: 178402706 Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Vancouver Device: Kobo Sage, Libra Colour, Lenovo M8 FHD, Paperwhite 4, Tolino epos	Good one! Did you hear about the guy who ate six cans of alphabet soup? He had the biggest vowel movement ever.

12-05-2025, 08:25 PM	#753
DNSB Bibliophagist Posts: 50,691 Karma: 178402706 Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Vancouver Device: Kobo Sage, Libra Colour, Lenovo M8 FHD, Paperwhite 4, Tolino epos	I before e, except when a weird but conscientious scientist like Einstein deigns to reimburse the concierge for the counterfeit eiderdown pillow or you run a feisty heist on a weird beige foreign neighbour!

12-08-2025, 09:02 PM	#754
DNSB Bibliophagist Posts: 50,691 Karma: 178402706 Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Vancouver Device: Kobo Sage, Libra Colour, Lenovo M8 FHD, Paperwhite 4, Tolino epos	Silence is golden... Unless you have a toddler, in which case silence is very, very suspicious. Something which my granddaughters make me very aware of.

12-11-2025, 07:26 PM	#756
DNSB Bibliophagist Posts: 50,691 Karma: 178402706 Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Vancouver Device: Kobo Sage, Libra Colour, Lenovo M8 FHD, Paperwhite 4, Tolino epos	Did you hear about the group of boats which crushed each other against their mooring structure? Yet more casualties of pier pressure.

12-11-2025, 07:29 PM	#757
JSWolf Resident Curmudgeon Posts: 82,240 Karma: 150871427 Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Roslindale, Massachusetts Device: Kobo Libra 2, Kobo Aura H2O, PRS-650, PRS-T1, nook STR, PW3	I'm so good at sleeping, I can do it with my eyes shut.

12-11-2025, 07:31 PM	#758
DNSB Bibliophagist Posts: 50,691 Karma: 178402706 Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Vancouver Device: Kobo Sage, Libra Colour, Lenovo M8 FHD, Paperwhite 4, Tolino epos	Scientists have finally discovered exactly how much sleep a human needs. “Just five minutes more.”

12-12-2025, 09:50 PM	#760
Fbone Is that a sandwich? Posts: 8,348 Karma: 105529930 Join Date: Jun 2010 Device: Nook Glowlight Plus	I wonder if the arachnophobia support group has a web site.

12-17-2025, 11:29 AM	#761
ownedbycats Custom User Title Posts: 11,595 Karma: 81412473 Join Date: Oct 2018 Location: Canada Device: Kobo Libra H2O, formerly Aura HD	What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? "Supplies!"

12-18-2025, 12:59 AM	#762
DNSB Bibliophagist Posts: 50,691 Karma: 178402706 Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Vancouver Device: Kobo Sage, Libra Colour, Lenovo M8 FHD, Paperwhite 4, Tolino epos	Today at my local grocery store, they were playing the 80’s “I bless the rains down in Africa” song, which is now ruthlessly stuck in my head. At least they had good bread, so it wasn’t a Toto loss. BTW, shouldn't it be red and blue for maroon? <snicker>

12-18-2025, 05:54 AM	#763
ownedbycats Custom User Title Posts: 11,595 Karma: 81412473 Join Date: Oct 2018 Location: Canada Device: Kobo Libra H2O, formerly Aura HD

12-19-2025, 06:30 AM	#764
DNSB Bibliophagist Posts: 50,691 Karma: 178402706 Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Vancouver Device: Kobo Sage, Libra Colour, Lenovo M8 FHD, Paperwhite 4, Tolino epos	Why did the ghost cross the road? To get to the Other Side

12-20-2025, 12:35 PM	#765
ownedbycats Custom User Title Posts: 11,595 Karma: 81412473 Join Date: Oct 2018 Location: Canada Device: Kobo Libra H2O, formerly Aura HD	My new sweater had too much static electricity, so I returned it. They gave me another one free of charge.