Silliness Terrible Jokes - Page 48

ownedbycats · 10-31-2025, 08:19 PM

A man fell into a meat grinder, becoming a sausage. To be frank, that's a dumb way to die.

DNSB · 10-31-2025, 09:08 PM

Does a Parseltongue in the Harry Potter Universe write code in Python?

ownedbycats · 11-01-2025, 10:29 PM

Applied for a job at the blacksmiths, who asked me "Are you any good at shoeing horses?"

I said “No, but I once told a donkey to get lost.”

DNSB · 11-01-2025, 11:11 PM

What do you call a snail that isn’t moving? An escar-stay.

ownedbycats · 11-04-2025, 09:22 AM

I saw an ad listing a radio with a broken volume control for $1. I couldn't turn it down.

DNSB · 11-04-2025, 10:08 PM

Did you hear about the actuary who wouldn’t make whipped cream? She was whisk-averse.

ownedbycats · 11-05-2025, 11:54 PM

I told hilarious joke about chocolate, caramel and peanuts, but nobody laughed. I thought I'd at least get a snicker.

DNSB · 11-06-2025, 12:42 AM

I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.

Fbone · 11-06-2025, 01:10 AM

OK, just so everybody’s clear, I’m going to put my glasses on.

DNSB · 11-06-2025, 01:33 AM

Why do university administrators love asparagus? It’s all stem

LostHisMarbles · 11-06-2025, 06:28 AM

Where do you get all these?

And my thanks for posting them!

JSWolf · 11-06-2025, 08:50 AM

Why can’t you trust an atom? Because they make up literally everything.

JSWolf · 11-06-2025, 08:51 AM

What happens to an illegally parked frog? It gets toad away.

JSWolf · 11-06-2025, 08:55 AM

Two widow friends were chatting about how they lost their husbands.

First widow, "How did your first husband die?"

Second widow, "He died from eating poisonous mushrooms".

"Oh, that's terrible! How did your second husband die?"

"He died from eating poisonous mushrooms too."

"That's terribly bad luck. How did your third husband die?"

"He broke his neck falling down the stairs"

"How did that happen?"

"He wouldn't eat his mushrooms"

ownedbycats · 11-11-2025, 03:16 PM

Scientists got bored after watching the Earth turn for 24 hours, so they called it a day.

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10-31-2025, 08:19 PM	#706
ownedbycats Custom User Title Posts: 11,393 Karma: 80947541 Join Date: Oct 2018 Location: Canada Device: Kobo Libra H2O, formerly Aura HD	A man fell into a meat grinder, becoming a sausage. To be frank, that's a dumb way to die.

10-31-2025, 09:08 PM	#707
DNSB Bibliophagist Posts: 48,812 Karma: 174510638 Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Vancouver Device: Kobo Sage, Libra Colour, Lenovo M8 FHD, Paperwhite 4, Tolino epos	Does a Parseltongue in the Harry Potter Universe write code in Python?

11-01-2025, 10:29 PM	#708
ownedbycats Custom User Title Posts: 11,393 Karma: 80947541 Join Date: Oct 2018 Location: Canada Device: Kobo Libra H2O, formerly Aura HD	Applied for a job at the blacksmiths, who asked me "Are you any good at shoeing horses?" I said “No, but I once told a donkey to get lost.”

11-01-2025, 11:11 PM	#709
DNSB Bibliophagist Posts: 48,812 Karma: 174510638 Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Vancouver Device: Kobo Sage, Libra Colour, Lenovo M8 FHD, Paperwhite 4, Tolino epos	What do you call a snail that isn’t moving? An escar-stay.

11-04-2025, 09:22 AM	#710
ownedbycats Custom User Title Posts: 11,393 Karma: 80947541 Join Date: Oct 2018 Location: Canada Device: Kobo Libra H2O, formerly Aura HD	I saw an ad listing a radio with a broken volume control for $1. I couldn't turn it down.

11-04-2025, 10:08 PM	#711
DNSB Bibliophagist Posts: 48,812 Karma: 174510638 Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Vancouver Device: Kobo Sage, Libra Colour, Lenovo M8 FHD, Paperwhite 4, Tolino epos	Did you hear about the actuary who wouldn’t make whipped cream? She was whisk-averse.

11-05-2025, 11:54 PM	#712
ownedbycats Custom User Title Posts: 11,393 Karma: 80947541 Join Date: Oct 2018 Location: Canada Device: Kobo Libra H2O, formerly Aura HD	I told hilarious joke about chocolate, caramel and peanuts, but nobody laughed. I thought I'd at least get a snicker.

11-06-2025, 12:42 AM	#713
DNSB Bibliophagist Posts: 48,812 Karma: 174510638 Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Vancouver Device: Kobo Sage, Libra Colour, Lenovo M8 FHD, Paperwhite 4, Tolino epos	I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.

11-06-2025, 01:10 AM	#714
Fbone Is that a sandwich? Posts: 8,324 Karma: 103930826 Join Date: Jun 2010 Device: Nook Glowlight Plus	OK, just so everybody’s clear, I’m going to put my glasses on.

11-06-2025, 01:33 AM	#715
DNSB Bibliophagist Posts: 48,812 Karma: 174510638 Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Vancouver Device: Kobo Sage, Libra Colour, Lenovo M8 FHD, Paperwhite 4, Tolino epos	Why do university administrators love asparagus? It’s all stem

11-06-2025, 06:28 AM	#716
LostHisMarbles Enthusiast Posts: 26 Karma: 556044 Join Date: Nov 2024 Device: Macbook	Where do you get all these? And my thanks for posting them!

11-06-2025, 08:50 AM	#717
JSWolf Resident Curmudgeon Posts: 81,083 Karma: 150263703 Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Roslindale, Massachusetts Device: Kobo Libra 2, Kobo Aura H2O, PRS-650, PRS-T1, nook STR, PW3	Why can’t you trust an atom? Because they make up literally everything.

11-06-2025, 08:51 AM	#718
JSWolf Resident Curmudgeon Posts: 81,083 Karma: 150263703 Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Roslindale, Massachusetts Device: Kobo Libra 2, Kobo Aura H2O, PRS-650, PRS-T1, nook STR, PW3	What happens to an illegally parked frog? It gets toad away.

11-06-2025, 08:55 AM	#719
JSWolf Resident Curmudgeon Posts: 81,083 Karma: 150263703 Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Roslindale, Massachusetts Device: Kobo Libra 2, Kobo Aura H2O, PRS-650, PRS-T1, nook STR, PW3	Two widow friends were chatting about how they lost their husbands. First widow, "How did your first husband die?" Second widow, "He died from eating poisonous mushrooms". "Oh, that's terrible! How did your second husband die?" "He died from eating poisonous mushrooms too." "That's terribly bad luck. How did your third husband die?" "He broke his neck falling down the stairs" "How did that happen?" "He wouldn't eat his mushrooms"

11-11-2025, 03:16 PM	#720
ownedbycats Custom User Title Posts: 11,393 Karma: 80947541 Join Date: Oct 2018 Location: Canada Device: Kobo Libra H2O, formerly Aura HD	Scientists got bored after watching the Earth turn for 24 hours, so they called it a day.