Are we escapists?

[LauraLynn]

Escape from my real life? Not me - I've been on safari deep into the Amazon jungle twice, drag raced, been a hot rod photographer, pet photographer, am now a teddy bear artist full time which I LOVE doing!

Reading books is a way to have a little vacation every day!

I have to say, I just got my eBookwise 14 days ago and found I am reading MUCH more often!

[RickyMaveety]

Originally Posted by LauraLynn

Escape from my real life? Not me - I've been on safari deep into the Amazon jungle twice, drag raced, been a hot rod photographer, pet photographer, am now a teddy bear artist full time which I LOVE doing!

Reading books is a way to have a little vacation every day!

I have to say, I just got my eBookwise 14 days ago and found I am reading MUCH more often!

And, what, pray tell, do you need a vacation from?? I mean .... most people take a vacation to have a little escape. So, why would you need or want a mini-vacation every day ... considering that your real life is so perfect.

Just curious.

[Alphapheemail]

Originally Posted by RickyMaveety

We disagree there. I've never found a living person who has really come to terms with the fact that, their next thirty minutes could be their last.

The only reason we function is not because people have come to terms with mortality, it's because they've learned to escape reality when it's too much to deal with.

The only people who have truly come to terms with life .... well, they're staring in their own personal version of the Dead Parrot Sketch.

O0o0o0o0ops, I mean that I have come to terms with mortality... but with the fact that I am not in control of my life and that it is ok. I don't think any one has comes to term with mortality as a whole. No species can grip with it, or else the strive to survive will not be there and that doesnt go hand in hand with natural selection.

[Alphapheemail]

Originally Posted by phenomshel

My ex in-laws used to gripe all the time because I took a book everywhere. I wasn't reading to escape them (at least not at that point), I was reading because that's what I enjoyed doing. Unfortunately, they took it as that I enjoyed doing that more than talking and interacting with them...which was partially true.

Yea i agree in this case it is litterally escapisim... lol

[pshrynk]

Originally Posted by RickyMaveety

And, what, pray tell, do you need a vacation from?? I mean .... most people take a vacation to have a little escape. So, why would you need or want a mini-vacation every day ... considering that your real life is so perfect.

Just curious.

She probably takes a vacation sitting in a cubicle, mindlessly moving pieces of paper from one basket to another.

[LauraLynn]

Originally Posted by RickyMaveety

And, what, pray tell, do you need a vacation from?? .............. ... considering that your real life is so perfect.

Just curious.

Nope, it's not perfect, but I am VERY lucky. My "previous life" (w/ ex husband) was NOT that great... we just won't go there.

My mind flits from one thing to another... I have to watch myself to be sure I keep on task. Working for yourself at home takes a lot of discipline and I have a little trouble with that.

Reading books allows my mind to "flit" for a little while, but I am able to get back to work after my lunch, etc. (I used to get involved in entirely new projects - particularly online... and then get nothing done!)

Edited to add: I guess it appeared to me that the friend was putting down all people who love to read and that they have boring lives... and that irked me.... so I posted.

[Tattncat]

Originally Posted by Alphapheemail

I was talking to a friend of mine and I was telling him how ever since I had the pleasure of welcoming my e-reader into my life I am devouring books ( I just started the Ender saga by Orson Scott) and I could never be happier!
He stated how he never really could understand how people read so much and he could never do it unless it was DIY books. He ended the convo by saying that he felt that people who had their noses so much in other worlds and lives were just trying to escape from their own realities.

Now, it did sound weird and somewhat true to an extent, but I still felt a bit apprehensive because I do not feel that's my main reason for reading so much.

I wanted to get the general opinion on this subject from the lovely gals and gents in this forum.

Thnx

Michelle

I was in an accident when I was eight and spent sometime confined indoors recuperating. I turned to books out of boredom and discovered another world. I could satisfy my curiosity and escape in one fell swoop. I was hooked and never having been much of a TV watcher, I have plenty of time for reading.

[LauraLynn]

Originally Posted by pshrynk

She probably takes a vacation sitting in a cubicle, mindlessly moving pieces of paper from one basket to another.

LOL!!!!

[bill_mchale]

Originally Posted by RickyMaveety

Well, no .... that wasn't what you said. Maybe that's what you meant. It is not what you said. Go back and read your post.

Actually, maybe you misinterpreted what I wrote. I said that I believed that there were people who had come to terms with their mortality.. and then I went on to (admittedly over generalized) suggest that soldiers who had seen extensive combat would have had to come to terms with it. I certainly believe some have.

All of this is essentially a different way of saying they have come to terms with death.

Of course there are people who have come to terms with death. I suppose there are people who also never have any need to escape from any aspect of the real world, no matter how incredibly awful that real world may be.

So, death and destruction all around them, and they are just fine with that. They've come to terms with that, and they are doing fine, just fine.

Me, I'll take refuge in a book from time to time. I like a bit of escape now and then.

The ironic thing here is that many books have more death and destruction in them than the real world. Certainly no reads 1984 to escape reality. But even many of the books I read to take a break from the day to day world involve wars and battles...

Ultimately, it is hardly my mortality that I need a break from; I know I am going to die at some point. Nothing I can do about it, so I try not to worry about it too much. What I need a break from is the drudgery of every day life. The hour or so I read a day pulls me away from contemplating how much I have left to clean in my basement, the stuff I have to do at work, etc.

--
Bill

[RickyMaveety]

Originally Posted by bill_mchale

Actually, I think there are in fact people who have come to terms with their mortality... I would guess that any man who saw extensive combat during war would need to come to terms with that reality simply to survive the experience.

Ultimately, it is hardly my mortality that I need a break from; I know I am going to die at some point. Nothing I can do about it, so I try not to worry about it too much. What I need a break from is the drudgery of every day life. The hour or so I read a day pulls me away from contemplating how much I have left to clean in my basement, the stuff I have to do at work, etc.

--
Bill

Here's where I think you are wrong. You assume that any person who is faced with extensive death has to "come to terms" with it in order to survive. I would say that's a proper expression of what you said.

Some people come to terms with it .... and they still need to escape. Some people don't so much come to terms with it as become numb to any feeling whatsoever .... and they still need to escape. And, some people snap ... and escape permanently.

If everyone was completely checked into the reality of their lives and those around them, all the time, day in and day out, no escape of any kind (even "safe" violence in a book or movie), I can pretty much guarantee you they would not survive.

And, even you admit that you need an escape from reality. Your reality isn't constantly watching people die (so you have to guess about that one .... I don't); your's is cleaning the garage ... and yet you still need an escape. Shocking.

[larisa0001]

Originally Posted by Alphapheemail

Ok so all points considered...
I see the joy that reading showers the reader with, and the art form, and the significance to one's intelligence, and the plethora of other forms of escapism.

But I still can't shake off this feeling that I can't handle life. That I'm too weak so I need to escape... maybe it's true. And so what! I think I'd rather escape in the tale of a brave 6 y.o. than drugs or the search for Paris' new BFF, both of which will eventually damage my capacity to absorb said tale. So one thing is for sure, if i plunged into drugs/Paris's enthralling life the same way i plunge into books I would certainly not be talking to you guys right now. ( Sorry I am thinking in typing form, and I may have answered my own question, but I'd still like to know what you guys think!)

Then I start thinking of the ancient Greeks and what would be their form of escapism, and I think that was how philosophy and mathematics came about. People trying to find something to do other than thinking about the mundane and boring.

Thoughts?

The ancient Greeks went to the theater and watched plays. That was their form of escapism. Or they listened to the local bard singing stories in iambic hexameter. Every culture has its fiction, its stories. Telling stories is an integral part of being human, and it can only enrich our existence.

I've been thinking about this issue quite a lot, and I do think there is a difference between reading for pleasure and reading for escape - just like there is a difference between eating normally and binge-eating, or between gambling for fun and pathological gambling. If you are performing an activity in order to enrich your life, it's quite different from performing the activity compulsively because your real life is too unpleasant to tolerate.

For me, the two types of reading feel different; when I read for pleasure, I think about the book. When I read for escape, I don't think about anything - I just get caught up in the story and forget everything else.

[naql]

For me reading is definitely escapism. I like to put my headphones on and just get into the book.

Being in the Coast Guard and having to get underway a bit all I have to escape from the boredom is either games, TV, or books. Now that I have my Kindle making sure that I have enough books to survive a trip is going to be much easier.

[RickyMaveety]

Originally Posted by LauraLynn

Nope, it's not perfect, but I am VERY lucky. My "previous life" (w/ ex husband) was NOT that great... we just won't go there.

My mind flits from one thing to another... I have to watch myself to be sure I keep on task. Working for yourself at home takes a lot of discipline and I have a little trouble with that.

Reading books allows my mind to "flit" for a little while, but I am able to get back to work after my lunch, etc. (I used to get involved in entirely new projects - particularly online... and then get nothing done!)

Edited to add: I guess it appeared to me that the friend was putting down all people who love to read and that they have boring lives... and that irked me.... so I posted.

Hmmm .... well, if that's what the original poster's friend meant, he and I should have a loooong sit down. Let's see:

1. Had been around the world by the time I was 17. Even learned how to dig a hole with a paintbrush at Akrotiri.

2. Was frozen to an outhouse seat in Bergen, Norway, in the middle of the freaking summer and had to sit there all night because no one could hear me yelling.

3. Helped a Lapp family bring in their herd and saw the Northern Lights.

4. Got dumped in Kowloon because my mother had a nervous breakdown. They thought my uncle would take care of me .... I don't actually remember seeing him the whole time I was there. I was 2.

5. One of my other uncles was made a KBE. He got me when I was 5.

6. Got stuck staying in a whorehouse one night when I was supposed to be staying in a convent (loose furniture works wonders to block doors).

7. Went on a road trip with a friend who supposedly had the plague. Ended up having an APB put out on us throughout the State of California.

8. Have worked as a doctor and an attorney. Graduated in the top five percent of my class both times.

9. Have 18 cats and 2 wolf-mix dogs.

10. Missed most of second grade sitting in an over sized oxygen tent with a zillion vaporizers in the room. Damn place looked like Dr. Frankenstein's lab;

11. In the last five weeks, I have:

a. Been trapped (well, OK .... they got me out pretty quick) in the flaming wreck of my munched car when a stupid truck did a U-turn in front of me on the highway;

b. Lost a beloved cat to cancer;

c. Flown 1400 miles to get a new car;

d. Drove back with no pain medication (hallucinated dancing bananas);

e. Reconnected with a man I dated in my 20s who is now a major player in social media and schmoozed with a zillion people at South by Southwest;

f. Got either stomach flu or food poisoning; and

g. Had my new car beaten to death by humongous hail stones.

I love to read, but anyone who thinks I've had a boring life is simply and utterly barking mad. Quite crackers. It's not even a working theory. Conversely, I believe that most people are bored (and lead boring lives) because they didn't develop a good reading habit. If they read, they would see that there are whole worlds out there to be explored, both in reality and in the imagination. Books and reading are still the only effective means of time travel out there, and they are an incredibly inexpensive, and generally immensely portable, means of entertainment and escape. They are certainly one of the best ways I see for attaining a good education. Screw teachers, just shovel in the reading material and come back later to test me.

Self-taught for most of the second grade, and when we moved to California (to be near the ocean so I could breathe -- that was the idea anyway), they wanted to skip me several grades because I was reading at such an advanced level.

Eh .... the OP's friend will probably lapse into early senility as a result of allowing his brain to atrophy .... prevention of that is another good result of lots of READING.

[badgoodDeb]

Perhaps some people (the aforementioned friend) are less of a loss, when they lapse into senility.....

Oh, did I say that outloud?

[pshrynk]

Originally Posted by RickyMaveety

Hmmm .... well, if that's what the original poster's friend meant, he and I should have a loooong sit down. Let's see:

6. Got stuck staying in a whorehouse one night when I was supposed to be staying in a convent (loose furniture works wonders to block doors).

Even with my anti-religion bias, I'm having a hard time seeing how that confusion could have been made...