The Vent and Rant Thread

[Hitch]

Yup, yup, yup. It's only 11:00 a.m., and today's winner so far:

SUBJ: TRANSLATE MY MANUSCRIPT FROM SWAHILI TO ENGLISH

I want your company to translate my book in English and other languages where the Amazon Kindle Direct Publishing are selling e books.

Say what? Nowhere, positively nowhere on my site do I say bupkus about translation services. I am positively boggled by this one. And SWAHILI? I mean, push comes to shove, we have a range of 2nd/3rd languages here, ranging from the usual for the USA (Spanish/French) to the less-so (Serbian, Russian and a few other bits and pieces of this and that) to babble along, passably, in an email--but translate a book? NO! No, I say.

Every time something really bizarre occurs, like this, I literally go stare at my site. I try to figure out what the hell happened. Where that idea would have come from.

Mind-blowing.

Hitch

[Cinisajoy]

Originally Posted by Hitch

Yup, yup, yup. It's only 11:00 a.m., and today's winner so far:



Say what? Nowhere, positively nowhere on my site do I say bupkus about translation services. I am positively boggled by this one. And SWAHILI? I mean, push comes to shove, we have a range of 2nd/3rd languages here, ranging from the usual for the USA (Spanish/French) to the less-so (Serbian, Russian and a few other bits and pieces of this and that) to babble along, passably, in an email--but translate a book? NO! No, I say.

Every time something really bizarre occurs, like this, I literally go stare at my site. I try to figure out what the hell happened. Where that idea would have come from.

Mind-blowing.

Hitch

You Make books ok you make book English.

I resisted the urge to tap the green button on your site.

[Rumpelteazer]

Originally Posted by Hitch

Yup, yup, yup. It's only 11:00 a.m., and today's winner so far:



Say what? Nowhere, positively nowhere on my site do I say bupkus about translation services. I am positively boggled by this one. And SWAHILI? I mean, push comes to shove, we have a range of 2nd/3rd languages here, ranging from the usual for the USA (Spanish/French) to the less-so (Serbian, Russian and a few other bits and pieces of this and that) to babble along, passably, in an email--but translate a book? NO! No, I say.

Every time something really bizarre occurs, like this, I literally go stare at my site. I try to figure out what the hell happened. Where that idea would have come from.

Mind-blowing.

Hitch

LOL, that's so recognizable!
You don't want to know how often we get people in our store asking if we sell for instance: toilet seats, shower heads, knobs for the radiator, gas things, birdhouses, car and boat parts (not lightbulbs), etc. When you walk into our store you see: lightbulbs, parts to put together or repair your own light fixture, wall socket and switched, extension cords, cables and plugs. Seriously, toilet seats? When people ask for water or gas things I just say that gas and water don't play well with electricity.

Most of the time you can see that people know we don't sell those items, but they don't know where to get them and don't want to ask us directly if we know where they can buy it.

[Cinisajoy]

Originally Posted by Rumpelteazer

LOL, that's so recognizable!
You don't want to know how often we get people in our store asking if we sell for instance: toilet seats, shower heads, knobs for the radiator, gas things, birdhouses, car and boat parts (not lightbulbs), etc. When you walk into our store you see: lightbulbs, parts to put together or repair your own light fixture, wall socket and switched, extension cords, cables and plugs. Seriously, toilet seats? When people ask for water or gas things I just say that gas and water don't play well with electricity.

Most of the time you can see that people know we don't sell those items, but they don't know where to get them and don't want to ask us directly if we know where they can buy it.

What you don't sell this?
http://www.us.kohler.com/us/Cachet-N...ts/1126452.htm

It has a light.

[Rumpelteazer]

I'm so glad I only worked this morning, by 2pm I was ready to beat the next customer for just looking wrong at me.

First I had a Russian customer completely flipping out because I dared to put her €100 note through the money-checker. Didn't we trust her, I only did it because she was Russian, blah blah blah. Actually we check every note, whether it's €5 or or €100. First of all, so we don't have to think with each note whether to check it or not. Second, I've heard that they are now making fake €5 and €10 notes, because they are often not checked and a lot of our customer are stores, cafés and restaurants.

Then, just after 11am I had a customer getting upset that we wouldn't repair her light fixture. On Thursday we do have consulting hour, but that's from 10am until 11am. My father was away (he is the "lamp doctor") and I am very strict with times. She insisted that she was told it was between 11am and noon.

Finally, I had a customer trying to intimidate us when we wouldn't exchange his €85 flashlight under warranty. He had put Ikea batteries in, which had leaked (tip: never buy Ikea batteries, they leak very very quickly) and damaged the flashlight beyond repair. Sorry, being cheap doesn't fall under warranty. Professional Duracell batteries cost €1 a piece or €8 for a pack of ten, if they leak and damage the item they are in Duracell pays for the damage.

[Rumpelteazer]

Originally Posted by Cinisajoy

What you don't sell this?
http://www.us.kohler.com/us/Cachet-N...ts/1126452.htm

It has a light.

LOL, I don't even know if you can get in from a Dutch supplier, and although I have one supplier which also sells some bathroom fittings, and probably a couple of toilet seats, because we don't do anything in that segment we don't get a good discount and can't price it competitively. Also, toilet seats are huge, we already have a space problem as it is.

If it was cheaper I might be interested, I hate turning on the light when I go use the toilet at night.

[badgoodDeb]

Originally Posted by Rumpelteazer

LOL, I don't even know if you can get in from a Dutch supplier, and although I have one supplier which also sells some bathroom fittings, and probably a couple of toilet seats, because we don't do anything in that segment we don't get a good discount and can't price it competitively. Also, toilet seats are huge, we already have a space problem as it is.

If it was cheaper I might be interested, I hate turning on the light when I go use the toilet at night.

Just put an LED clock in the bathroom, and you'll have no problem. I never turn on the light, as I have an LED clock in both the bedroom and the bathroom. Just the right amount of light for dark-attuned eyes.

[Rumpelteazer]

Originally Posted by badgoodDeb

Just put an LED clock in the bathroom, and you'll have no problem. I never turn on the light, as I have an LED clock in both the bedroom and the bathroom. Just the right amount of light for dark-attuned eyes.

I have one of those old fashioned orange, neon nightlights next to the toilet door so I can find it without turning on the light. To get from my bedroom to the toilet I have to go through my computer/craft room. I recently put a 0.3 watt led bulb (comparable to a 10 watt incandescent light bulb) in a light fixture I had laying around (I collect light fixtures like some women collect shoes or handbags), connected it to a wireless switch and stuck the remote switch next to my bed. Now I don't walk into things or step on things on my way.

[Cinisajoy]

Originally Posted by Rumpelteazer

LOL, I don't even know if you can get in from a Dutch supplier, and although I have one supplier which also sells some bathroom fittings, and probably a couple of toilet seats, because we don't do anything in that segment we don't get a good discount and can't price it competitively. Also, toilet seats are huge, we already have a space problem as it is.

If it was cheaper I might be interested, I hate turning on the light when I go use the toilet at night.

Seriously here you go.
A light for your toilet. $10USD.
https://www.amazon.com/WEBSUN-Motion...dp/B01MZ3RRDR/

[Greg Anos]

Originally Posted by Hitch

Yup, yup, yup. It's only 11:00 a.m., and today's winner so far:



Say what? Nowhere, positively nowhere on my site do I say bupkus about translation services. I am positively boggled by this one. And SWAHILI? I mean, push comes to shove, we have a range of 2nd/3rd languages here, ranging from the usual for the USA (Spanish/French) to the less-so (Serbian, Russian and a few other bits and pieces of this and that) to babble along, passably, in an email--but translate a book? NO! No, I say.

Every time something really bizarre occurs, like this, I literally go stare at my site. I try to figure out what the hell happened. Where that idea would have come from.

Mind-blowing.

Hitch

Hitch, I'm waiting for a phone with a "white list" of acceptable numbers, and all others go to a message that says - "if you really know me and want to get reach me on a continuing basis, please leave your name and number., and I'll add it to my list. If you press 1 my phone will ring, but if you are telemarketing, you will be shown no mercy."

RSE

[Rumpelteazer]

Originally Posted by Cinisajoy

Seriously here you go.
A light for your toilet. $10USD.
https://www.amazon.com/WEBSUN-Motion...dp/B01MZ3RRDR/

Now, that I would sell in the store as a one time novelty item. We once had a shipment of fiber optic fake flower bouquet. They were sold out within two weeks. People found them so ugly they just had to buy one. We had one in the shop window and people walking by often did double takes when they walked past. The toilet night light at least has a practical function.

[CRussel]

Originally Posted by Hitch

Yup, yup, yup. It's only 11:00 a.m., and today's winner so far:



Say what? Nowhere, positively nowhere on my site do I say bupkus about translation services. I am positively boggled by this one. And SWAHILI? I mean, push comes to shove, we have a range of 2nd/3rd languages here, ranging from the usual for the USA (Spanish/French) to the less-so (Serbian, Russian and a few other bits and pieces of this and that) to babble along, passably, in an email--but translate a book? NO! No, I say.

Every time something really bizarre occurs, like this, I literally go stare at my site. I try to figure out what the hell happened. Where that idea would have come from.

Mind-blowing.

Hitch

Now see, you're missing a business opportunity here, Hitch.

Look up translation services, find the one with the best reputation and highest costs in the business, and quote their price plus 30 or 40% for the annoyance factor.

Or, if you're really annoyed, a flat 200% of their quote.

[badgoodDeb]

Sure, 200%, since you'll be outsourcing to them and you have to add your own profit on top.

[Hitch]

Originally Posted by Ralph Sir Edward

Hitch, I'm waiting for a phone with a "white list" of acceptable numbers, and all others go to a message that says - "if you really know me and want to get reach me on a continuing basis, please leave your name and number., and I'll add it to my list. If you press 1 my phone will ring, but if you are telemarketing, you will be shown no mercy."

RSE

I like that idea--the problem with it is, how do you track down those spammers in outer Slobbovia, or wherever, and beat the holy crap out of them? :-)

Originally Posted by CRussel

Now see, you're missing a business opportunity here, Hitch.

snippage

Or, if you're really annoyed, a flat 200% of their quote.

Originally Posted by badgoodDeb

Sure, 200%, since you'll be outsourcing to them and you have to add your own profit on top.

You guys are simply better evil geniuses than I am. I'm obviously just a mediocre evil genius. Or worse, a severely-lacking evil genius....

Hitch

[CRussel]

Originally Posted by Hitch

You guys are simply better evil geniuses than I am. I'm obviously just a mediocre evil genius. Or worse, a severely-lacking evil genius....

Hitch

Why thank you, Hitch.