CSI SPOILERS - Why I have trouble watching certain shows

[RickyMaveety]

Originally Posted by Nate the great

Unfortunately, NCIS is horrible with DC area geography. Every time they mention a location by name, it doesn't exist nor does anything similar exist in that location. For instance, in season 3 someone is kidnapped at Braddock Mall. I froze the DVD when they had the map up on their plasma. They placed Braddock Mall at the corner of Braddock and Ox Rd (Rt 123), right on top of George Mason University! What's really funny is that I could still read the names of the roads on the GMU campus. What's even funnier is that they had Ox Rd stop in a residential community in southern Fairfax county.

As good as that show is, I hate it when they screw up like this.

I enjoy NCIS, but even they get the lab work screwed up a fair amount of the time. That, and I used to date the guy that the character of Gibbs is based on (not Mark Harmon ... he was a friend from college ... but an NCIS team leader who the folks in LA based the character on).

Of course, why they decided to move the setting to DC is beyond me ....

[RickyMaveety]

Originally Posted by zelda_pinwheel

i watch ncis because it's almost like a parody of this type of show and hilariously well-done. i've no clue about DC area geography so that never bothers me.

(actually i've no clue about medicine or forensics either, so they could just be making stuff up and i would still be entertained.)

And about half the time they are making this stuff up .... and that's what makes me CRAZY!!!

[RickyMaveety]

Originally Posted by pshrynk

Don't get me started on pshrynks as protrayed by Holywood!

Oh, well, since you insist...

1 - i don't spend hours on end with neurotic, whiney patients. I spend a lot of time with severely suicidal, nearly immobilized patients and severely psychotic patients.

2 - I don't have a corner office in a high rise on Manhattan where I do (1) above, and nothing else.

3 - I don't have an office filled with books and busts of Freud in the hospital where I do nothing but psychotherapy with said, neurotic, whiney patients. I see them at bedside for about fifteen minutes a day.

4 - I don't keep patients in hospital for looooooong stays. My average length of stay is about 4.5 days. Infact, no where do you find patients in a hospital who have been there since the Truman Administration unless they are severely psychotic and totally refractory to meds.

5 - If someone is refractory, I do not allow them to wander around the unit being crazy at the world in general. We have meds that can help, even if they are not totally effective.

6 - I am not unethical, so I do not a) sleep with my patients, b) sleep with my patients' relatives, c) sleep with the nurses or therapists who work for me (other than my wife, but that's okay.) d) give massive doses of tranquilizing medications to neurotic, whiney patients who are having a bad day, or e) misdiagnose and treat just because I'm a pompous choom.

7 - I am not crazier than my patients. I am not psychotic. I especially do not eat my patients.

and 8 - I cannot read your farking mind and do NOT do free psychotherapy at parties.

But that's just my opinion, I could be wrong.

Yup ... I hear you. And, don't even get me started on the portrayal of most attorneys. Good lord!

Back to medical for a moment .... so in "Eleventh Hour" which I watched (while working on some additional building projects), the FBI actually bursts into an operating room, guns drawn, with the patient open on the table, no masks ... nothing .... and the surgeon takes off his mask, and everyone is yapping at each other (with the OR door wide open) for several minutes.

No other hospital personnel anywhere to be seen. Oh, right ... like that ever happens. Apparently we mustn't let good drama get in the way of reality.

[pshrynk]

And last night on gray's Anatomy, which was on while I was reading Sourcery...

They had a bunch of pigs in a surgey lab that the residents were tasked with keeping alive after receiving stab wounds. No veterinarian or vet techs anywhere to be seen, just residents bonding with pigs. Animal lab is so warming with vets and VA's that you can hardly step to the side without stepping on one of them. And they are the ones who do the euthanasia, and the wounds, not the doctors. Sheesh!

[RickyMaveety]

Originally Posted by pshrynk

And last night on gray's Anatomy, which was on while I was reading Sourcery...

They had a bunch of pigs in a surgey lab that the residents were tasked with keeping alive after receiving stab wounds. No veterinarian or vet techs anywhere to be seen, just residents bonding with pigs. Animal lab is so warming with vets and VA's that you can hardly step to the side without stepping on one of them. And they are the ones who do the euthanasia, and the wounds, not the doctors. Sheesh!

OMG!! That is exactly the kind of thing I'm talking about!! Too funny. I don't think many of the interns or residents ever even ventured into the animal labs at UCLA Medical Center. I doubt most even knew where they were. Frankly, I positively hated going up there. It just depressed me too much. (And, the only reason I ever went up there was to pick up pathology materials when I was an undergrad and working at the Med Center as an accessions clerk.)

[ShortNCuddlyAm]

Thankfully I never seem to see too many IT professionals portrayed on TV or film

Which might purely be because I watch so little of either...

[RickyMaveety]

Originally Posted by ShortNCuddlyAm

Thankfully I never seem to see too many IT professionals portrayed on TV or film

Which might purely be because I watch so little of either...

Yes, but ... how many times have you seen a computer do a ginormous database search with several hundred variables in like 5 seconds?? On a regular computer no less.

[ShortNCuddlyAm]

Originally Posted by RickyMaveety

Yes, but ... how many times have you seen a computer do a ginormous database search with several hundred variables in like 5 seconds?? On a regular computer no less.

Not to mention the incredible resolution and detail when zooming pictures to 100000% or whatever.

[zelda_pinwheel]

Originally Posted by ShortNCuddlyAm

Not to mention the incredible resolution and detail when zooming pictures to 100000% or whatever.

oh, that one is my personal favorite !! especially when they get footage from something like a security camera, and there's a vague smudge off in the distance (down at the other end of the alley) that *might* be the bad guy, running across the extreme edge of the camera's field, and they say "let me just clean that up for you" and the image is somehow transformed into a high-res perfectly focussed photo with no motion blur and not a single compression artifact. man, if only the photoshop "unsharp mask" worked like that !

[RickyMaveety]

Originally Posted by zelda_pinwheel

oh, that one is my personal favorite !! especially when they get footage from something like a security camera, and there's a vague smudge off in the distance (down at the other end of the alley) that *might* be the bad guy, running across the extreme edge of the camera's field, and they say "let me just clean that up for you" and the image is somehow transformed into a high-res perfectly focussed photo with no motion blur and not a single compression artifact. man, if only the photoshop "unsharp mask" worked like that !

Oh AMEN!! That is one that just give me the giggles. Or the one pixel blip that is someone's license plate .... and "just let me zoom in on that" and the numbers come up clear as day.

Riiiiiight!!!

[zelda_pinwheel]

oh, yeah, the licence plate zoom !!! classic.

[RCR]

Originally Posted by Slite

2) Most female CSI's are NOT that hot! (was that a sexist remark?)

And all that hair swishing over the evidence. Contamination anyone?

One scene that remains burned into my memory was of a female CSI, (the blonde one with the grating whiny nasal accent, I think), crawling up the corridor of a house, gun drawn, after the bad guy. She sees a handgun on the floor so she scoops it up, stuffs it down the front of her jeans, and carries on crawling. Ouch - there goes the evidence. And no checking if the gun is safe! I imagined the damn thing going off and remodeling her lady parts.

[nohmi2]

Originally Posted by ShortNCuddlyAm

Not to mention the incredible resolution and detail when zooming pictures to 100000% or whatever.

This might give you a giggle about Tv or movie shows. It's from eTales.

It is always possible to park directly outside any building you are visiting.

A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.

If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps.

Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communication systems of any alien civilization.

It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts - your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predessers.

When a person is knocked unconscious by a blow to the head, they will never suffer concussion or brain damage.

No one involved in a car chase, hijacking, explosion volcanic eruption or alien invasion will ever go into shock.

Police Departments give their officers personality test to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite.

When they are alone foreigners prefer to speak English to to each other.

You can always find a chainsaw when you need one.

Any lock can be picked by a credit card or a paper clip in seconds, unless it's a door to a burning building with a child trapped inside.

An Electric fence powerful enough to kill a dinosaur will cause no lasting damage to an eight-year old-child.

[Patricia]

And (on television) police officers never seem to lock their cars.

[RickyMaveety]

Originally Posted by nohmi2

This might give you a giggle about Tv or movie shows. It's from eTales.

It is always possible to park directly outside any building you are visiting.

A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.

If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps.

Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communication systems of any alien civilization.

It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts - your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predessers.

When a person is knocked unconscious by a blow to the head, they will never suffer concussion or brain damage.

No one involved in a car chase, hijacking, explosion volcanic eruption or alien invasion will ever go into shock.

Police Departments give their officers personality test to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite.

When they are alone foreigners prefer to speak English to to each other.

You can always find a chainsaw when you need one.

Any lock can be picked by a credit card or a paper clip in seconds, unless it's a door to a burning building with a child trapped inside.

An Electric fence powerful enough to kill a dinosaur will cause no lasting damage to an eight-year old-child.

Add to that the fact that:

Your clunker of a car will run perfectly for 40 years, until you are being followed on foot by a lunatic in a hockey mask wielding an axe. In which case, it will, of course, fail to start.