Books We Lie About Having Read

[Barty]

Originally Posted by FlorenceArt

Did you also read the part where Moses orders the massacre of women and children? Numbers 31:17.

Well, they probably had it coming.

Also, he didn't say kill all the women and children. Just the boys, the women, and the girls who'd had sex. The virginal girls, "keep alive for yourselves."

I guess if you were into boys, virginal or otherwise, you were out of luck.

[miguel1626]

A quick FYI: The Brick Testament reenacts several biblical passages using Lego. It's a delightful way to learn the Bible

For instance, did you know that God Wants Part of Penis Cut Off? Or did you hear about the time when Abram impregnated a slave-girl? They even recount the Burning Bush episode.

[tvuongpham]

Originally Posted by kennyc

I'm proud to say I've not read the listed books in the article, though I did just recently move "The Great Gatsby" up a notch or two on the TBR list.

Great Gatsby wasn't too terrible a read.. required reading in high school.
As well as A Tale of Two Cities in the 9th grade.

I have a long list of classics that were required reading.. few I have found time to re-read, but none the less, reading and discussing as a class is helpful.

Wuthering Heights was ok too.. ;-)
Heart of Darkness pretty grim...

[tvuongpham]

What is more funny is when someone says they have read something.. then goes to wax and wane about the book, but in truth is quoting the movie version.. haha :-)

[QuantumIguana]

Originally Posted by tvuongpham

What is more funny is when someone says they have read something.. then goes to wax and wane about the book, but in truth is quoting the movie version.. haha :-)

One must be cautious about such things. I did a book review of Frankenstein in high school. I didn't get far in the book, I just went with what I knew from movies. The real danger of that is if you include something from the movie that is not from the book, then you can get in trouble. I did go back and actually read it many years later.

I do find that since I got an e-reader, I'm finishing more books. With paper books, the book gets set down, it gets buried or you forget where it is. With a e-books, the book is always right there, waiting to be finished, looking at you with disapproval.

[miguel1626]

Originally Posted by tvuongpham

What is more funny is when someone says they have read something.. then goes to wax and wane about the book, but in truth is quoting the movie version.. haha :-)

Even worse when people start complaining about how awful Book X is, when they only watched the movie. I see it happen all the time with Stephen King books.

[FlorenceArt]

Originally Posted by QuantumIguana

I do find that since I got an e-reader, I'm finishing more books. With paper books, the book gets set down, it gets buried or you forget where it is. With a e-books, the book is always right there, waiting to be finished, looking at you with disapproval.

It's the opposite for me. With the abundance of free ebooks, I sometimes start books that I am not very motivated to finish. Plus, always having several books at my disposal at any time makes it easier to just give up if one is boring me, and start another. With paper books I at least had to wait until I got home to another book. Though I remember two books that were so bad, I just stopped reading in the middle of my metro ride. One of them I even left on the seat.

[ebusinesstutor]

Originally Posted by FlorenceArt

Did you also read the part where Moses orders the massacre of women and children? Numbers 31:17.

Yes, the same Moses that brought the Ten Commandments including "Thou shalt not kill."

This is why the Bible is so much fun...

[applesauce]

Originally Posted by miguel1626

Even worse when people start complaining about how awful Book X is, when they only watched the movie. I see it happen all the time with Stephen King books.

So agree the most horrid movies ever made but the books are a good read.

applesauce

[yoho]

Originally Posted by wyndslash

it's quite common here; i mean, when it comes to high school book reports and such, most students here usually just read the summary from the internet and talk about that. the lazier ones just outright copy the summary.

i ever did this too.

[LovesMacs]

Yup, I'm guilty of this too. I had to read The Great Gatsby when I was maybe 15 or so. I did actually read the book, as in reading words and turning pages, but I retained almost none of it in my memory. I wasn't half the reader I am now.

Now I'm interested in reading it, with the new movie coming out and all. It'll still have to wait with all the other books I have on my TBR list.

[Joykins]

Originally Posted by Anabana

I found the perfect solution to all those should-have-reads or 'want to say I've read'. It's called ShrinkLits - "Seventy of the world's towering classics cut down to size." By Maurice Sagoff

So in rhyme (and 111 pages), from Lysistrata to Catcher in the Rye, Moll Flanders to Portnoy's Complaint, Beowulf to Lolita, etc.. Here's The Pilgrim's Progress, John Bunyan:

Christian slogs
Weary miles.
God's apostle,
Orbi, urbi.

Through bogs,
Over stiles.
A colossal
Bunyan Derby.

So can I now say I've read them all?

Richard Armour's _American Lit Relit_ and _The Classics Reclassified_ are old favorites of mine (funny, but not, alas, in rhyme--nor in ebook).

[Jasja]

Hmmmm, I don't understand why anyone would pretend to have read a book that they didn't actually (completely) read... The other way around, maybe... but what I am really wondering now is what is wrong with dinner parties?

[Rob Lister]

Originally Posted by Jasja

Hmmmm, I don't understand why anyone would pretend to have read a book that they didn't actually (completely) read... The other way around, maybe... but what I am really wondering now is what is wrong with dinner parties?

The hostess can't cook worth a damn. Worse, she 'experimented' with new recipes and haphazardly substituted ingredients. The pork was undercooked, the bread overcooked. The asparagus was raw because that's the newest fad. Worse still, the butter unclarified, the dinnerware chipped, the silver unmatching. The tablecloth had stains, the chairs were rickety, the room hot. The wine was utterly unpalatable; it is unlikely it ever met a real grape. Her husband's a bore; dominates every topic of conversation, only reads the classics, actually believes the NYT reviews, and thinks eReaders are for illiterates.

[jtdolphins]

Originally Posted by ebusinesstutor

Actually I read that one cover to cover. It lets me have great fun pointing out to some people that what they believe isn't really what's in the bible.

I am a bit stunned at the number of Christians who have never actually read the bible. I just don't understand it.

The only other book that someone has lied to me about reading is Lord of The Rings. We were coming out of the movie and this guy starts talking about the books and Tolkien. It was obvious that he was making things up to a number of people.

Everyone looked at me, since they knew it was my favorite book. I had written about the books and Tolkien on a couple of occasions. I didn't say anything at first, because my future wife didn't want me to.

He wouldn't listen to the others that he might not want to lie about it. He insisted that he was telling the truth, so I stepped in. He ended up admitting he had never read Tolkien. It was sad, but the guy was always a know it all type and a jerk.