The Vent and Rant Thread

[nekokami]

My condolences! Please accept some Lindt dark chocolate with chili and cherry filling. (Hey, you don't have to be female for chocolate to help!)

Regarding the diversion of the thread to discussions of chocolate, I remind you all that this was a bribe to me NOT to rant about something absolutely NONE of you want to hear about.

I consider myself sufficiently bribed. You may return to your ranting and venting.

My contribution:

I've been wanting to change the visual theme of the website I administer (for a public university) for about a year (more or less since I was hired into this job). For all that time, I was told that the "Technology Committee" needed to meet to discuss the website before I could make changes. So I waited. And waited. Members were elected to the committee. I waited. The interim dean didn't seem inclined to appoint the needed additional members to the committee. I waited. The new Dean came in last July, and was busy with other things. I waited. The Dean eventually appointed the missing members. Oddly enough, I wasn't included (why should the tech people be on a technology committee, after all?) Everyone else was busy with semester stuff. I waited some more. (Actually, at this point, I started to plot a coup, but I was asked quite nicely by my manager to hold off a bit while he tried to talk the Dean into nudging things along.) Eventually I was told, after the committee had met three times, that I would be invited to the next meeting. (You can imagine what happened next. No? I waited, of course.) It's been months. There has been no "next meeting."

Meanwhile, the graduate program office has been complaining more or less constantly about the website, with me reminding them that I can't do anything until the tech committee meets. Finally, I tried to get the member of the tech committee who's in the graduate office to get involved in a pilot of a new theme specifically to meet grad office complaints. No, she didn't want to do that, because the grad office was about to get a new director, and one of the candidates was also on the tech committee, so she thought that would be a bad political move, I guess. Fine. A week later, the director was chosen, and it wasn't the person on the tech committee. Fine. She still didn't want to give input.

At this point I went to the Dean, asked for 30 seconds of his time, showed him the new theme, and got the green light to proceed without involving the tech committee (on the grounds that I wasn't changing functionality, only doing "a little clean-up.") I sent the tech committee members a courtesy note explaining that I planned to make changes within the next week and asking them to review the new visual theme on the test server. I got one response back (not from the graduate office). A week later, I made the switch.

That was all two weeks ago. Yesterday the woman from the graduate office told me that the site still didn't look good in her opinion. I suggested that it would have been nice to receive that input before I'd made the theme change, but I still offered to have a focus session with the graduate office to collect their requirements and try to arrange things to meet their needs. She had all kinds of reasons why she couldn't do that right now.

I think some people would rather complain than actually fix things.

Not me, though. I've been considering sending a plague of locusts. Any other suggestions?

[pshrynk]

In those circumstances, I usually have an informal discussion with one of the not really key players, asking for "input" and then do whatever it is that is needed to be done. Then, when someone raises questions, I tell them that I "talked with some people" and that they gave input. Then act as if there were no real reason to be upset, since the project worked.

It is easier to ask forgiveness than for permission.

[GeoffC]

Originally Posted by zelda_pinwheel

hee ! i like you.

Thanks you (doh - you didn't mean me!!)

Originally Posted by zelda_pinwheel

i may kill myself : if it keeps raining all the way into JUNE.

Please don't.... Send the rain to me, we've had very little this last month and all my plants are wilting.

Originally Posted by badgoodDeb

I know. I HATE that test too. It's just a jet of air --- but my eyeball isn't made to have ANYTHING shot at it, thank you very much.

Looking at your avatar I thought you had 20/20 vision...

Originally Posted by zelda_pinwheel

i showed him though, i turned stark white and almost fainted, and had to lie down with my feet up and eat some sugar. "hm, you're very sensitive, aren't you," he said to me. as if it were *surprising* that i would react badly to things being shot at my eyeballs, with no warning whatsoever. sheesh.

Originally Posted by yvanleterrible

Prostate check? Hah! that's nothing! Just you wait for the annual colonoscopy. Now that's a gas!Especially the flushing part.

Try a sigmoidoscopy, especially when the monitor for the camera is close at hand...

Originally Posted by yvanleterrible

Wait till you see the probe they use! It's 4 feet long and 1 inch in diameter, then you'll also be stricken with heart problems. There's a good part though, they have to administer an opiate of some kind. Cool buzz. Of course no driving allowed.

No opiate or other inducements given, see above...

Originally Posted by nekokami

You people. (You MALE people, I mean.) Until you have had your uterus "sounded" you don't know what discomfort is. I am so glad I decided to opt out of having babies.

No, I will not provide further details.

On second thought, maybe I WILL. You can prevent this by sending large quantities of chocolate my way. 70% cocoa or don't waste my time.

Chocolate given...

Originally Posted by zelda_pinwheel

i know, right ??
y'all, i would take that very seriously. you should be organising a freighter-load of 70% chocolate by tomorrow morning, if you know what's good for you. and i say that as a woman.

Booked for delivery..

Originally Posted by montsnmags

While tactfully avoiding the ARRGHHNOTHESCREAMINGHORRORMAKEITSTOPMAKEITSTOP! subject, the times that news or documentary programs have shown a mammogram in action, I've thought to myself, "No...that can't be right...surely...". It made me wonder if, when they said "screening" they meant "screen printing").

I've chartered a tanker.

Cheers,
Marc

Mine said repeatedly, never again and can I go home....

You can't charter the tanker - I had the last one in port...

Originally Posted by RWood

I have found that white chocolate does not relieve the cravings of women. It is no substitute for the REAL chocolate at the 70% cocoa level. Marc, make that a supertanker, a PANMAX tanker may not be enough.

not what I read...

[QUOTE]

Originally Posted by nekokami

Yes. Exactly.

I'm one of the few people I know who will actually eat the 99% stuff straight, though. (I admit I do generally prefer it as the base for my hot cocoa.)

Virtual tankers of chocolate are acceptable, so long as they are described enthusiastically enough. Extra points for organic fair-trade chocolate. I also accept single-estate organic Darjeeling tea, preferably first flush rather than autumnal.

Originally Posted by zelda_pinwheel

hmm, all this talk of chocoate has sent me to the kitchen... now i am savouring some "sélection NOIR 72% cacao aux éclats de fèves de cacao caramélisés" : 72% black chocolat with caramelised fragments of cacao beans. miam... here neko-chan, have some. the chocolate has a full rich flavor and is agreeably creamy as it melts on your tongue, and the fragments lend interesting texture as they are slightly crunchy and chewy between your teeth, with a rather smoky taste...

Originally Posted by pshrynk

And.... this is a rant in what way?

Originally Posted by Patricia

Wood hasn't any chocolate because he isn't a woman. It is women who need chocolate. And, on reading the last few posts I now have a serious envie de chocolat...

Originally Posted by yvanleterrible

I just found an other rant. Sexism.
I love dark chocolate!!! Now where is it written that it's a women only thing?

Originally Posted by zelda_pinwheel

oh, men may *love* chocolate ; but only women *need* chocolate.

Now this is getting very serious... all...

patricia, i've saved you some of mine. you know i'll always share chocoalte with you. i might even have enough for the rest of you lot, if you play your cards right. if not, Geoff is the resident chocolate fairy in these parts...

Thank you - NOW I BEG to ask, please leave the Chocolate giving to the expert..... or no-one will get any. The over bookiing of tankers, big, large super-size or what-ever is seriously depleting my treasure troves...

Originally Posted by RWood

What is this a karma for chocolate ransom?

You may be lucky one day...

Originally Posted by zelda_pinwheel

why, would that work ?

Try it and see..

Originally Posted by pshrynk

In those circumstances, I usually have an informal discussion with one of the not really key players, asking for "input" and then do whatever it is that is needed to be done. Then, when someone raises questions, I tell them that I "talked with some people" and that they gave input. Then act as if there were no real reason to be upset, since the project worked.

It is easier to ask forgiveness than for permission.

Amen....

Better not stay away too long next time - you lot are capable of doing a lot of damage on your own... As they say, "when the cats away the mice (and squirrels) will play" ...

[zelda_pinwheel]

neko-chan chérie, you let me know how that plaque of locusts works ; i can think of several clients it might be appropriate for.

[badgoodDeb]

The plague of locusts worked pretty well the first time it was tried .......

[GeoffC]

Originally Posted by nekokami

Not me, though. I've been considering sending a plague of locusts. Any other suggestions?

The Scottish Midge population is soaring, we can send you a few million...

[cftall]

If I chose too be a small minded ignoramus I could use a thinly veiled argument in a blog as an excuse to bash a country.Being a patriot of the U.S.A. AND A VETwho has traveled to 30 different countries in my life finding common ground with their people and wonderful memories. I am tired of those people who leave no stone unturned in their relentless search for ways to bash my country.So to all those folks I say KISS MY AMERICAN A.. . I FEEL SOOOOO MUCH BETTER. C.F.Tall

[GeoffC]

Originally Posted by cftall

If I chose too be a small minded ignoramus I could use a thinly veiled argument in a blog as an excuse to bash a country.Being a patriot of the U.S.A. AND A VETwho has traveled to 30 different countries in my life finding common ground with their people and wonderful memories. I am tired of those people who leave no stone unturned in their relentless search for ways to bash my country.So to all those folks I say KISS MY AMERICAN A.. . I FEEL SOOOOO MUCH BETTER. C.F.Tall

Wow!!

Where'd that come from?

[cftall]

actually I was readin a blog at feedbooks that was translated in english and took exception to "Oliver 2 ".I read a lot of blogs and run in to this way too much ergo my response in vent and rant C.F.Tall

[cftall]

Did I really write that? How churlish of me. Bein an old biker we are crabby,opinionated,dont spell very well,outspoken,and yes we fart in public. How bout dem bears- I mean ebooks. Charlie "Crackers" Tall

[GeoffC]

Originally Posted by cftall

Did I really write that? How churlish of me. Bein an old biker we are crabby,opinionated,dont spell very well,outspoken,and yes we fart in public. How bout dem bears- I mean ebooks. Charlie "Crackers" Tall

[badgoodDeb]

Originally Posted by cftall

Did I really write that? How churlish of me. Bein an old biker we are crabby,opinionated,dont spell very well,outspoken,and yes we fart in public. How bout dem bears- I mean ebooks. Charlie "Crackers" Tall

Bears .... does that mean you are from Chicago-land? Hiya! Stick with the ebooks -- they have a better track record. (not that I pay attention to sports ... I only remember Michael Jordan, and the Frig and McMann.)

[RWood]

Originally Posted by pshrynk

In those circumstances, I usually have an informal discussion with one of the not really key players, asking for "input" and then do whatever it is that is needed to be done. Then, when someone raises questions, I tell them that I "talked with some people" and that they gave input. Then act as if there were no real reason to be upset, since the project worked.

It is easier to ask forgiveness than for permission.

I always interviewed as many of the people involved (stakeholders they called themselves) so that everyone felt that I had listened to them. I then developed the system I felt they needed. When it worked they always said that it was just as they had asked for.

[zelda_pinwheel]

the key is convincing them it was their idea.

[zelda_pinwheel]

bad keyboards !!!

my last keyboard was a cheap affair, the most basic one you can buy, and it served me faithfully for several years. it was i don't know the how many-th keyboard of its kind i have bought, replacing them with a twin when necessary. incredibly ugly (beige, in fact, like a *really* old mac), but thoroughly functional. it had nice supple keys, quite responsive, which made a satisfying click when you hit them. there was a separate numerical keypad (essential), the F keys were divided into groups which made finding the F5 and F6 keys easy without looking at them, the arrow keys were in their own little mini-cluster along with the home, screen print, end and delete key (and a couple of others i never use), and the enter key was a large, unmissable L shaped block. i could navigate the entire thing blindfolded.

but it was very old and probably had absorbed more dust (and cat hair... infernal cats...) than i can imagine, and the keys had become quite hard to depress, so that lately half of the letters i typed would not appear. infuriating, when you type very quickly without looking at the keyboard (as i do). so yesterday i bought a new one.

i asked for the cheapest one they had (15€), expecting it to be yet again the same beige basic model i always ended up with.

alas.

it is black and stylie, but who cares. it is an "enhanced" media keyboard, with a whole row of completely superfluous keys at the top, to launch my browser / email client / music player from the keyboard ! (if i install the driver, of course). i have a very nice dock at the top of my screen, and i am quite handy with a mouse, so i really don't need this.

it is a compact model, and the keys are shallow so the topography is not so pronounced, and my fingers never seem to know where they are. i still have a numerical keypad, but all the keys from the arrow block have been integrated into the main block, and the F keys are all run together immediately above the top number keys, to make room for the screen print, "arrêt défil", "pause attn" and delete keys at the end of the row, and this row is only about half the height of the regular keys. no more ctrl+F5 or F6 (insert new keyframe) without looking. and since the backspace key is no longer the top corner key, i will have to pay attention to find it instead of the home key, the "arrêt défil", "pause attn" or delete keys which now surround it.

the enter key is only a double width key instead of an L, and above it (not to the left of it), where the riser of the L should be, is where they stuck the asterisk / mu key !!! which means i have to lift my hand completely from the keyboard to type an asterisk. since i *like* to use asterisks (as i have just demonstrated, completely spontaneously), this is a problem. incomprehensibly, there is also a *duplicate* of this key between the left alt key and the (ridiculously truncated) spacebar. why ???

but the *worst* feature of this keyboard is that the keys have a spongy, evasive touch to them, which means that, once again, half the letters i type do not appear... including, frequently, the letter F, which being directly under my index finger is not likely to be a key i can miss or hit too lightly.

it is driving me crazy. CRAZY. CRAZY !!!

if i cannot adapt to it in 2 or 3 days (why should i need to adapt to a KEYBOARD ??? normally i can use one almost without any conscious thought or attention, and that is exactly how it should be.) i will have to buy another one, and in the meantime i can see my typing will be more like typo-ing, and i will spend my time constantly irritated by the poor ergonomics of this infuriatingly bad design.

if i could find the incompetent buffoon who has inflicted this upon me, i would hit him over the head with his own useless keyboard. if *you* find him, please do it for me, and also tell him where he can stick his stupid, defective "f" key (and what it stands for).