I am going to bed! [unutterable silliness] - Page 6

NatCh · 05-06-2008, 08:39 AM

Yeah, see, that's big and all, but it lacks the sheer evil that reeks from the Texas Cockroach. Among other things, these bastards fly, and they will chase you. Some of the more ... impressive specimens reach 2" (~5cm) in length. They attack in the night, feasting on the sleeping (leave nasty welts too). They're always waiting to pounce when you least expect it. They're pure e-vil I tell you ... wonder if they're related to Hastur ....

montsnmags · 05-06-2008, 08:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NatCh

...They attack in the night, feasting on the sleeping (leave nasty welts too). They're always waiting to pounce when you least expect it. They're pure e-vil I tell you ...

Ahh, I see. Like horses then, but smaller.

What, you didn't know that about horses?

...jumping their fences at the full moon ("sleep standing up", my big, fat hairy clacker!), sucking out your lifeforce, feasting on human flesh, kicking small children out windows, voting Conservative...

I urge you, keep your doors shut, and leave sugar cubes on your neighbour's lawn.

Cheers,
Marc

vivaldirules · 05-06-2008, 08:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by zelda_pinwheel

vr do you really go to bed at 9:15 ???

Yes, 4:30 comes early. I'm glad I went to bed when I did last night because I did not dream about cockroaches. Or of Marc's dinner party. I haven't a thing to wear and I'm afraid that won't matter much. Intestine anyone? How about a nice spleen?

montsnmags · 05-06-2008, 08:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vivaldirules

Yes, 4:30 comes early. I'm glad I went to bed when I did last night because I did not dream about cockroaches. Or of Marc's dinner party. I haven't a thing to wear and I'm afraid that won't matter much. Intestine anyone? How about a nice spleen?

"NatCh's spleen" - now not just an expression of humour, but of good taste.

Cheers,
Marc (You don't need that spleen, do you, NatCh?)

zelda_pinwheel · 05-06-2008, 09:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vivaldirules

Yes, 4:30 comes early.

in the name of all things holy, tell me you don't really get up at 4.30 ????? that's just not human. it's barbaric. it's like some kind of highly refined torture. seriously, rebell, revolt, protest by any means necessary ; no-one should have to endure that. my god, that's not even daytime !! for me, that would mean getting up before i actually went to bed, some nights. last night, for example. no, really, that's too much to bear.

(i'm practising real-life time-shifting. I'm planning to shift myself further and further ahead until I finally make a full turn around the clockface and end up reaching tomorrow. it will be like living in australia. i'll find everything out 1 day in advance, but i'm not sure i'll be able to get the message back to you lot stranded in yesterday. i'll have to ask marc how it works.)

Quote:

I'm glad I went to bed when I did last night because I did not dream about cockroaches. Or of Marc's dinner party.

you and me both, brotha.

i may have to stop frequenting this thread, the bugs are getting out of control.

Taylor514ce · 05-06-2008, 09:11 AM

Maybe we can induce the squirrels and the cockroaches into a battle?

Steven Lyle Jordan · 05-06-2008, 09:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NatCh

Yeah, see, that's big and all, but it lacks the sheer evil that reeks from the Texas Cockroach. Among other things, these bastards fly, and they will chase you.

Happened to me in Tuskegee, Alabama. No lie.

First day at school, and I'm approaching the dorm where I'll be staying. One of those was on the brick wall outside. As I approached the door, he detached, and with a sickly drone that sounded like the playing cards you attach to your bicycle wheel to get that loud snapping sound, he dive-bombed me and pulled up just before strafing my head.

That was the day I formally met the Roaches from Hell. (Looking for Hell? Just visit Tuskegee in September.) I still have the marks on my arms where I dived headfirst into the brush to get away from it.

montsnmags · 05-06-2008, 09:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by zelda_pinwheel

... i'll find everything out 1 day in advance, but i'm not sure i'll be able to get the message back to you lot stranded in yesterday. i'll have to ask marc how it works.)

Let me give you some tips...

Never put off until Yesterday what you could do on the 13th of July, the 30th of February, or the twelfth of never, unless you can do it Monday fortnight in which case can you bring some milk for coffee?

Also, dance. Dance like no-one's pointing their finger at you giggling up a lung. And spin. Spin SPIN SPIN! Spin like no-one's coming at you with a large hypodermic and those funny pyjamas that tie up by their sleeves at the back.

Then, you will be in the world of tomorrow (or, at least, a different world, with more wavy lines and bright colours).

Quote:

i may have to stop frequenting this thread, the bugs are getting out of control.

ToMAYto; toMARto. PoTAYto; poTARto. Bugs; canapés. It's all just regional differences.

Cheers,
Marc (with a silent pee)

montsnmags · 05-06-2008, 10:05 AM

Alas, once again, it is well-past my bedtime and I must love you and leave you. I can tell by the heavy silence that you are all stunned with grief, but I shall return, less tired, and with a more-fully-working left-brain directing the show.

So, it being the time of departure, I once again offer my now traditional (if you do it twice, it's a tradition), potentially deathbed, egressional confessional...

I once broke into the tucker shop of the East Sale RAAF Base footy club and stole a whole box of jelly (Americans, think "jello") crystals, and then ate them all, straight, on the way home.

I never got sick, and neither did my urine or faeces turn green (or perhaps I should say "lime"). I totally got away with it. It was like the perfect murder, but without all the mess you have to clean up when committing that...umm, so I'm told.

Thank-you, and good night,
Marc (Master Criminal and Sweets-lover)

vivaldirules · 05-06-2008, 10:05 AM

ZP, I'm not sure which frightens you most - the bugs, Marc's dinner party, or the thought of getting up before dawn. As to time-shifting, my goal is to get up so early that it will actually be yesterday when I crawl out of bed. That way I can repair whatever damage I did in the past before anybody finds out. It'll be a lot like living in Australia, I'm sure. I should ask Marc. Uh, on second thought, maybe I should start going to bed at a more reasonable time like everyone else.

badgoodDeb · 05-06-2008, 02:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vivaldirules

ZP, I'm not sure which frightens you most - the bugs, Marc's dinner party, or the thought of getting up before dawn.

For me, it's definitely the getting up before dawn. I prefer days when I don't have to get up before NOON, let alone dawn. It does make it hard to work, but they don't seem to mind if I keep a later shift. ZP, I'll meet you in tomorrow. Left turn at the first star, is it?

nekokami · 05-06-2008, 06:14 PM

With these blasted allergies (due to some of the tiniest of our insectoid alien invaders), I'm beginning to have trouble distinguishing between being awake and being asleep. So I guess I can post in this thread anytime. Not that I can think of anything suitably entertaining to add....

RWood · 05-06-2008, 06:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NatCh

Yeah, see, that's big and all, but it lacks the sheer evil that reeks from the Texas Cockroach. Among other things, these bastards fly, and they will chase you. Some of the more ... impressive specimens reach 2" (~5cm) in length. They attack in the night, feasting on the sleeping (leave nasty welts too). They're always waiting to pounce when you least expect it. They're pure e-vil I tell you ... wonder if they're related to Hastur ....

In San Antonio (part of Texas and site of the Alamo) when I was a wee lad the cockroaches were large enough that a gang of six could steal a baby. Seems that while they could carry it, it was too large to eat on the spot. So it seems that even cockroaches have fast food to go.

zelda_pinwheel · 05-06-2008, 06:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RWood

In San Antonio (part of Texas and site of the Alamo) when I was a wee lad the cockroaches were large enough that a gang of six could steal a baby. Seems that while they could carry it, it was too large to eat on the spot. So it seems that even cockroaches have fast food to go.

hmm. "cockroaches stole my baby" ? infinitely icky, but somehow lacking the dramatic ring that comes with a dingo-based tragedy.

nekokami · 05-06-2008, 06:55 PM

How about "acariens stole my baby"? No? "Acariens stole my health and sanity"?

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05-06-2008, 08:39 AM	#76
NatCh Gizmologist Posts: 11,615 Karma: 929550 Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Republic of Texas Embassy at Jackson, TN Device: Pocketbook Touch HD3	Yeah, see, that's big and all, but it lacks the sheer evil that reeks from the Texas Cockroach. Among other things, these bastards fly, and they will chase you. Some of the more ... impressive specimens reach 2" (~5cm) in length. They attack in the night, feasting on the sleeping (leave nasty welts too). They're always waiting to pounce when you least expect it. They're pure e-vil I tell you ... wonder if they're related to Hastur ....

05-06-2008, 09:11 AM	#81
Taylor514ce Actively passive. Posts: 2,042 Karma: 478376 Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: US Device: Sony PRS-505/LC	Maybe we can induce the squirrels and the cockroaches into a battle?

05-06-2008, 10:05 AM	#84
montsnmags Grand Sorcerer Posts: 10,155 Karma: 4632658 Join Date: Nov 2007 Device: none	Alas, once again, it is well-past my bedtime and I must love you and leave you. I can tell by the heavy silence that you are all stunned with grief, but I shall return, less tired, and with a more-fully-working left-brain directing the show. So, it being the time of departure, I once again offer my now traditional (if you do it twice, it's a tradition), potentially deathbed, egressional confessional... I once broke into the tucker shop of the East Sale RAAF Base footy club and stole a whole box of jelly (Americans, think "jello") crystals, and then ate them all, straight, on the way home. I never got sick, and neither did my urine or faeces turn green (or perhaps I should say "lime"). I totally got away with it. It was like the perfect murder, but without all the mess you have to clean up when committing that...umm, so I'm told. Thank-you, and good night, Marc (Master Criminal and Sweets-lover)

05-06-2008, 10:05 AM	#85
vivaldirules When's Doughnut Day? Posts: 10,059 Karma: 13675475 Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Houston, TX, US Device: Sony PRS-505, iPad	ZP, I'm not sure which frightens you most - the bugs, Marc's dinner party, or the thought of getting up before dawn. As to time-shifting, my goal is to get up so early that it will actually be yesterday when I crawl out of bed. That way I can repair whatever damage I did in the past before anybody finds out. It'll be a lot like living in Australia, I'm sure. I should ask Marc. Uh, on second thought, maybe I should start going to bed at a more reasonable time like everyone else.

05-06-2008, 06:14 PM	#87
nekokami fruminous edugeek Posts: 6,745 Karma: 551260 Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Northeast US Device: iPad, eBw 1150	With these blasted allergies (due to some of the tiniest of our insectoid alien invaders), I'm beginning to have trouble distinguishing between being awake and being asleep. So I guess I can post in this thread anytime. Not that I can think of anything suitably entertaining to add....

05-06-2008, 06:55 PM	#90
nekokami fruminous edugeek Posts: 6,745 Karma: 551260 Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Northeast US Device: iPad, eBw 1150	How about "acariens stole my baby"? No? "Acariens stole my health and sanity"?