The Vent and Rant Thread

[dsvick]

Originally Posted by MacEachaidh

Oooh, gotta love those salespeople!

I ended up getting out of IT because, although I generally loved the job and much about it made the Virgo kitten in my personality purr, I finally decided it wasn't worth the stress. What got me in the end was working for managers whose only real goal was to *be* the manager, to be in control and tell people what to do, often with no understanding of the consequences of their decisions and no willingness to consult or collaborate in case it eroded the perception of their power and authority. I got tired of enabling people who were accountable only to their own ego, and working untenable hours - much of which was never remunerated - and have them take the credit and the rewards. What kind of life is that?!

It was terrifying. But what's been fabulous about it is that, since I screwed my courage to my own particular sticking-place and took the step, my interests and abilities have blossomed in all sorts of other areas I never imagined they might. It may seem an odd thing to say on a rant thread, but I'm so much happier !!

Originally Posted by kennyc

Good for you!

Yes, congrats. That must have taken a lot of courage!! What did you end up going into? Was it something you already had training in? If you say "management", I'm leaving

[MacEachaidh]

Originally Posted by dsvick

If you say "management", I'm leaving

!!

Well, in some ways it was made easy for me, in the sense that I had a nasty accident that took the decisions out of my hands. I lost my footing on a marble staircase that had been mopped and left puddled and slippery, fell over the handrail and down the stairwell, landed on a marble floor, smashed my spine and lost my job. I was laid up for a while and even had to learn to walk again, so the severing was kinda done for me. (No, I meant the job, not my vertebrae ...) And then ... it was pretty easy, once I had some distance from the day-to-day, to realise I just didn't want to wade back into that particular swamp.

I got a job sub-editing a couple of magazines (yeah, OK, they're computer magazines, but I had to leverage my skillset somehow!) - it only barely pays the bills, and often not even that, but it's a start - and I put some time into improving my Gaelic, which I hadn't used for a long time. I now sing traditional music in a semi-professional quartet of which I'm the musical director, and teach the language at university. All things that I never had time to even think about before.

And it's much better than crawling around under computer desks!!

[kennyc]

Originally Posted by MacEachaidh

!!

Well, in some ways it was made easy for me, in the sense that I had a nasty accident that took the decisions out of my hands. I lost my footing on a marble staircase that had been mopped and left puddled and slippery, fell over the handrail and down the stairwell, landed on a marble floor, smashed my spine and lost my job. I was laid up for a while and even had to learn to walk again, so the severing was kinda done for me. (No, I meant the job, not my vertebrae ...) And then ... it was pretty easy, once I had some distance from the day-to-day, to realise I just didn't want to wade back into that particular swamp.

I got a job sub-editing a couple of magazines (yeah, OK, they're computer magazines, but I had to leverage my skillset somehow!) - it only barely pays the bills, and often not even that, but it's a start - and I put some time into improving my Gaelic, which I hadn't used for a long time. I now sing traditional music in a semi-professional quartet of which I'm the musical director, and teach the language at university. All things that I never had time to even think about before.

And it's much better than crawling around under computer desks!!

Wow!!

[dsvick]

Originally Posted by MacEachaidh

Well, in some ways it was made easy for me, in the sense that I had a nasty accident that took the decisions out of my hands. I lost my footing on a marble staircase that had been mopped and left puddled and slippery, fell over the handrail and down the stairwell, landed on a marble floor, smashed my spine and lost my job. I was laid up for a while and even had to learn to walk again, so the severing was kinda done for me. (No, I meant the job, not my vertebrae ...)

Wow is right!! That sounds painful just thinking about it. Good thing you don't live in Seattle or that KK doesn't live in near you - or you would have landed on her

[kindlekitten]

Originally Posted by dsvick

Wow is right!! That sounds painful just thinking about it. Good thing you don't live in Seattle or that KK doesn't live in near you - or you would have landed on her

*snort cackle*

[kennyc]

Originally Posted by dsvick

Wow is right!! That sounds painful just thinking about it. Good thing you don't live in Seattle or that KK doesn't live in near you - or you would have landed on her

[nohmi2]

Originally Posted by MacEachaidh

!!

Well, in some ways it was made easy for me, in the sense that I had a nasty accident that took the decisions out of my hands. I lost my footing on a marble staircase that had been mopped and left puddled and slippery, fell over the handrail and down the stairwell, landed on a marble floor, smashed my spine and lost my job. I was laid up for a while and even had to learn to walk again, so the severing was kinda done for me. (No, I meant the job, not my vertebrae ...) And then ... it was pretty easy, once I had some distance from the day-to-day, to realise I just didn't want to wade back into that particular swamp.

I got a job sub-editing a couple of magazines (yeah, OK, they're computer magazines, but I had to leverage my skillset somehow!) - it only barely pays the bills, and often not even that, but it's a start - and I put some time into improving my Gaelic, which I hadn't used for a long time. I now sing traditional music in a semi-professional quartet of which I'm the musical director, and teach the language at university. All things that I never had time to even think about before.

And it's much better than crawling around under computer desks!!

I am impressed.

Karma

Cheers

[phenomshel]

Wondering if I should be concerned about my growing tendency to NOT sit on my hands and say nothing to provocations. Twice today (just today, mind you), I've posted messages that could be construed as "inflammatory" if you were in that kind of mood. This is highly unusual for me, as most of y'all can attest to. I'll usually walk away from any sort of argument rather than engaging.

[Williamlk]

Originally Posted by phenomshel

Wondering if I should be concerned about my growing tendency to NOT sit on my hands and say nothing to provocations. Twice today (just today, mind you), I've posted messages that could be construed as "inflammatory" if you were in that kind of mood. This is highly unusual for me, as most of y'all can attest to. I'll usually walk away from any sort of argument rather than engaging.

WOW, you have a lot of Karma. I should be happy for you, but I need to vent about that! You must be a much better person than I.

[phenomshel]

Originally Posted by Williamlk

WOW, you have a lot of Karma. I should be happy for you, but I need to vent about that! You must be a much better person than I.

ROFLMAO!! Honey, look at the join dates. I've had a lot longer to accumulate that Karma...

[Williamlk]

Originally Posted by phenomshel

ROFLMAO!! Honey, look at the join dates. I've had a lot longer to accumulate that Karma...

I'm mad anyway! My sales stink this month, I'm just taking it out on you.

[DMcCunney]

Originally Posted by phenomshel

Wondering if I should be concerned about my growing tendency to NOT sit on my hands and say nothing to provocations. Twice today (just today, mind you), I've posted messages that could be construed as "inflammatory" if you were in that kind of mood. This is highly unusual for me, as most of y'all can attest to. I'll usually walk away from any sort of argument rather than engaging.

It can be a challenge.

The practice I've followed for decades is "Pretend the person you're talking to is standing in front of you, and they're 6" taller, 50lbs heavier, and inclined to rebut strongly phrased arguments with a straight right to the jaw. Then ask yourself if you really want to phrase your stinging rebuttal in exactly those terms?"

I used to moderate ten message areas back when when you participated in forums like this by calling a BBS over a modem. BBSes aggregated into networks, who passed message traffic around, and I found myself a moderator on the second largest at the time. Part of my task was to maintain order and prevent flame wars, and the best way to do that was present an example by my own behavior of how one behaved in the message areas.

It worked fairly well. My areas largely ran themselves, my participants were likely to pounce on offensive behavior with "We don't do that here!" before I even saw it, and if I did have lay down the law, I could usually find a way to present it as an informational message to all reminding them of network rules without singling out individuals. I did try to be scrupulously fair, and if a conflict arose, I was careful to let both sides have a say before stepping in with a virtual bucket of cold water. That way, they could back off without losing face or feeling discriminated against. I was also helped by the fact that my network required people to post under their real names, so you couldn't hide behind an alias.

There was a channel users could use to complain to network management if they felt a moderator was unfair to them, but I never got a complaint. I did get some "We're in good hands" private compliments.

It was fun, but it was a lot of work, and looking back, I'm not sure how I managed it.

MobileRead is a place where habits acquired years ago come in handy. It's a lovely community, and I very seldom have to actually wear my moderator hat, but I have a good notion of what to do if I have to. A good bit of that is simply having patience and not stepping in too quickly. I expect disagreements to occur, and consider some level of conflict healthy. I also expect those participating to be adults and behave like it. If people don't know how to behave in public and hold their tongue, I can and will hold it for them, but thus far, I haven't had to.

It's made a little easier by the fact that little really upsets me. I don't have a lot of emotional capital invested various religious, philosophical, or political positions, and won't squawk with outrage if I'm disagreed with.

But I've gotten karma for a few posts where all I could say was "Thank you, but if I'd responded as they deserved, we'd call the paramedics because they were crispy around the edges..."
______
Dennis

[GeoffC]

i wish some pc in china would stop attacking my wifi !

[phenomshel]

Originally Posted by DMcCunney

It can be a challenge.

The practice I've followed for decades is "Pretend the person you're talking to is standing in front of you, and they're 6" taller, 50lbs heavier, and inclined to rebut strongly phrased arguments with a straight right to the jaw. Then ask yourself if you really want to phrase your stinging rebuttal in exactly those terms?"

I used to moderate ten message areas back when when you participated in forums like this by calling a BBS over a modem. BBSes aggregated into networks, who passed message traffic around, and I found myself a moderator on the second largest at the time. Part of my task was to maintain order and prevent flame wars, and the best way to do that was present an example by my own behavior of how one behaved in the message areas.

It worked fairly well. My areas largely ran themselves, my participants were likely to pounce on offensive behavior with "We don't do that here!" before I even saw it, and if I did have lay down the law, I could usually find a way to present it as an informational message to all reminding them of network rules without singling out individuals. I did try to be scrupulously fair, and if a conflict arose, I was careful to let both sides have a say before stepping in with a virtual bucket of cold water. That way, they could back off without losing face or feeling discriminated against. I was also helped by the fact that my network required people to post under their real names, so you couldn't hide behind an alias.

There was a channel users could use to complain to network management if they felt a moderator was unfair to them, but I never got a complaint. I did get some "We're in good hands" private compliments.

It was fun, but it was a lot of work, and looking back, I'm not sure how I managed it.

MobileRead is a place where habits acquired years ago come in handy. It's a lovely community, and I very seldom have to actually wear my moderator hat, but I have a good notion of what to do if I have to. A good bit of that is simply having patience and not stepping in too quickly. I expect disagreements to occur, and consider some level of conflict healthy. I also expect those participating to be adults and behave like it. If people don't know how to behave in public and hold their tongue, I can and will hold it for them, but thus far, I haven't had to.

It's made a little easier by the fact that little really upsets me. I don't have a lot of emotional capital invested various religious, philosophical, or political positions, and won't squawk with outrage if I'm disagreed with.

But I've gotten karma for a few posts where all I could say was "Thank you, but if I'd responded as they deserved, we'd call the paramedics because they were crispy around the edges..."
______
Dennis

What do you do when everyone is six inches taller and outweighs you by 50 lbs?

[GeoffC]

if they are taller ! that brings their vulnerable bits closer to your fist