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Dear world scientists,
I need a cheap mattermitter. NOW. Cos I really, really, really hate moving. I didn't last week, but I do now.
Love,
Naomi
Dear Real Estate Agent,
If I broke the tenancy agreement in the first week, you'd be all ripping my head off and breathing fire. So don't you dare make the slightest complaint - not even a sigh - when I point out the 5 different breaches and how two of them are major fire dangers. You need a sign on the wall of your inner sanctum, "Remember, team - remove head from arse, THEN do your job!"
Regards,
Naomi
*mutter*
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