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Old 09-15-2011, 03:31 PM   #315
phenomshel
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Stitchawl View Post
Can't one please both themselves and their significant others? I would think that best. No argument that we need to please ourselves, but aren't there times when we want do things to please others?


Stitchawl
Only quoting one thing here, because I'm lazy. Chris and I have an "understanding" about lingerie. I love the stuff, but only if it's comfortable and makes me feel sexy - I don't like the costume type, and neither does he. Chris's favorite thing to see me in, oddly enough, is the plain old gray sweatpants and one of his old gray t-shirts or sweatshirts. I switch out between the two, according to my mood.

That being said, I think Chris and I naturally fell into the understanding that if you feel good you look good. I don't think it works that way for everyone, though. I see a lot of guys complain that their wife/ gf never dresses up for them; or doesn't wear lingerie. And I see a lot of women complain that their guy expects them to be uncomfortable for the sake of looking sexy.

There are definitely times that we want to please others. I just don't think it should always be one party trying to please, which I think is what Betty was getting at. For some reason, in lots of cultures, it always seems to be the woman's job to please the man. Of course, then there's the point that men just look stupid in lingerie....
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