[desertgrandma]

Originally Posted by wvcherrybomb

I hope you don't mind if I throw something out there in this thread.

Would those of you who are married or in a commited relationship consider it cheating if your significant other developed a very personal relationship online?

A few people have posted here about meeting their spouse online. But what if the relationship in question was in addition to a marriage/commitment?

That is what I've been trying to say.....not that online relationships in themselves are bad, but if they are being pursured in addition to marriage.....

Originally Posted by Exer

I'm not saying that everyone of their age is like that, of course not. I'd never make such a sweeping generalization. Cute.But I can see how someone of that age might think differently about a technology like the internet. I can easily see how one might feel it was "unreal", and should have no impact on "real life".

I can see how someone like that could think of the internet as more of a quaint diversion. Something to be hopped into briefly and then set aside when done.

I grew up in a different era.

My first real job was as a freelance web-designer. All my contacts were online. All my clients found me through the internet. My entire portfolio was virtual. I had no office you could come visit. My projects usually went from start to finish without me ever meeting my employer face to face. My efforts on the internet provided the down payment on my house, and completely paid for my first car. So I see the "real" aspects of what the internet can help provide all around me.

(Not to mention the one I wake up next to daily )

I think the internet can provide real jobs, real support and real relationships. I think it can provide friendship and love. I think it is a door to people and places that you would never otherwise get to know.

But we aren't talking jobs, or casual friendships. We're talking, at least I am talking married people pursuing something a bit closer.

Originally Posted by Pookeysgirl

Agreed! If my husband feels the need to get personal with another woman on/offline i would simply tell him "There's the door, don't let it hit you in the ass on the way out".

Originally Posted by wvcherrybomb

Not in a physical sense since I am talking about an online only relationship. But, I still consider it cheating if a certain amount of intimacy is involved.

I only asked this because reading through the posts it becomes clear that the OP is married. I was just wondering if he were trying to justify or find "moral support" for an online affair. Even if I am completely wrong in my reasoning, this question still adds to the discussion, in my opinion.

Thats exactly my opinion on the original post.

Originally Posted by badgoodDeb

As a first try at an answer: if you would object to your spouse reading it over your shoulder, then it's too personal of a relationship.

Perfectly put.

Originally Posted by beppe

A personal question. I find your comment a bit too close. If you want to know more about me personally, why don't you use private messages?
In any case, here it is (it is my duty to please posters on my thread):

Yes, I am married. I can certainly add the happily that is expected in these cases. Although it is really none of your businesses
No, I am not justifying an online affair, or finding "moral support" for it. And this also is truly none of your businesses, or not? Not ordinarily, but you put the question out there, Beppe.

I started this thread because I am interested in Internet relations, not necessarily nor primarily romantic. This site has a potential for quality Internet relations. I am fascinated by them. I am fascinated by the quality of the people here, by the passion and intensity that pop up from the posts on this site. By the desires to please, to be liked, appreciated, admired, listened to, that I see. By the humanity that is revealed. I like people, I would not mind to have a deep personal relation with a number of distinguished members on this site, none particularly romantic mind you. Ah, my destiny is to desire ... and to dream. My curse is to have chosen the role of jester. I like it anyhow. Better that than other ones, more serious and more boring maybe.

I rather go back to more serious topics than my personal affairs.

But, you can't have it both ways. You are asking for approval of persuring and having "deep personal relationships" with some here, but don't want anyone to butt into your personal affairs.

How about having your wife join MR and letting us know her opinion?

Like 'Shel and Devils Advocate?

We could use more couples here.