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Old 04-12-2017, 08:26 AM   #1
Dr. Drib
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Nose damages Oasis screen - Amazon to blame for designing faulty cover

First, I had a cover on my ebook, and the cover failed to protect the screen. True, it was folded back, otherwise I wouldn't have been able to read the ebook, "Reanimators," by Pete Rawlik. But that's no excuse for the cover failing to protect my Kindle Oasis.

All I was doing was lying in bed on my back, the Oasis held about 1 foot above me. I momentarily fell asleep - not because Rawlik's book was boring; on the contrary, it's quite exciting - and the Oasis crashed into my nose.

The problem may have been that the Oasis is too light. Imagine (if you will) that you are holding your hands in the air above your head. Wouldn't you fall asleep, thinking that you're holding nothing and that there's no reason to hold your arms up in the first place?!

Needless to say, I'm extremely disappointed in Amazon. If they had engineered this device properly, there wouldn't have been a problem in the first place.

Amazon should have designed a cover to protect it from nose drops, and they should have made it no lighter than an Ipad, but heavier than a feather.

Photos to follow, as soon as my nose heals sufficiently so that I no longer have to breathe through my mouth.

This is a true story. Otherwise, it would be false.

(Photos actually WILL follow, but only after I see who is in sympathy with Amazon. I want to know my enemies.)
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Old 04-12-2017, 08:50 AM   #2
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I couldn't agree more! That cover needs folding legs, so you can prop it up above you!
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Old 04-12-2017, 09:02 AM   #3
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You have learned one thing: Your face is not repulsive.
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Old 04-12-2017, 09:18 AM   #4
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Perhaps your lawsuit will finally prompt Amazon to develop an aerial drone cover that holds itself above your head.
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Old 04-12-2017, 09:39 AM   #5
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You are 12 days late with your post. Today is not April 1st. But why hasn't Amazon made a reader with a titanium eink screen? Terrible lack of foresight on their part.
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Old 04-12-2017, 10:51 AM   #6
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The Oasis did not fall on your nose. Your nose started it by being somewhere it didn't belong. It was supposed to move out of the way when the Oasis decided it wanted to go to bed.
So will the Oasis be pressing charges because your nose damaged it out of spite.

I know the nose said the Oasis started the fight.
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Old 04-12-2017, 10:52 AM   #7
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I guess now Amazon will have to put a warning: falling Oasis can cause injury or possibly be damaged.
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Old 04-12-2017, 10:56 AM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by booklover6 View Post
You are 12 days late with your post. Today is not April 1st. But why hasn't Amazon made a reader with a titanium eink screen? Terrible lack of foresight on their part.
Wait 'til I post the photos, my friend.
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Old 04-12-2017, 11:16 AM   #9
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Wait 'til I post the photos, my friend.
We need nose pics.

(That sounds so wrong. )
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Old 04-12-2017, 11:18 AM   #10
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Here are two images. Note the two vertical lines, one of which is outside the margin where reading occurs.

I noticed this a day or two after the nose job.



Most unfortunate.
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Old 04-12-2017, 12:14 PM   #11
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Originally Posted by Dr. Drib View Post
Here are two images. Note the two vertical lines, one of which is outside the margin where reading occurs.

I noticed this a day or two after the nose job.



Most unfortunate.
That is a funny looking nose.
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Old 04-12-2017, 12:17 PM   #12
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Oh and dearest Don, I think but I am not sure that the cover has to actually be over the screen to protect it from evil noses. I could be wrong though. It might need to be beside it. Or under it. Oh wait, the cover needed to be in the kitchen.
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Old 04-12-2017, 12:43 PM   #13
Dr. Drib
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Oh and dearest Don, I think but I am not sure that the cover has to actually be over the screen to protect it from evil noses. I could be wrong though. It might need to be beside it. Or under it. Oh wait, the cover needed to be in the kitchen.

I think a cover should completely cover an ebook reader, even when reading. One's roof doesn't fold back when going to bed, does it? The roof completely covers a house, if I'm not mistaken.

However, I'll await some thoughts from Jon on covers, as he's the expert, before succumbing to an emotional outburst.
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Old 04-12-2017, 01:05 PM   #14
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I think a cover should completely cover an ebook reader, even when reading. One's roof doesn't fold back when going to bed, does it? The roof completely covers a house, if I'm not mistaken.

However, I'll await some thoughts from Jon on covers, as he's the expert, before succumbing to an emotional outburst.
You are so right. We must have the expert opinion before getting emotional.
So until you hear from Jon, keep all ereaders away from noses. We can't take any chances on a recurrence.

Now where is he? I actually miss him.
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Old 04-12-2017, 01:36 PM   #15
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Simple. Your nose is just abnormally big, to get in the way of a little reader. You need cosmetic surgery.
(ducking for cover...)
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