Silliness Add/Read a good joke to lighten your day - Page 727

doubleshuffle · 03-31-2020, 04:40 AM

A joke for the Spud who is keeping this thread going:

There was a royal potato family. You had King Potato, Queen Potato and Princess Potato. And Princess Potato wanted to get married to Dan Rather. And so she walked over to King Potato and asked him, "Father, I wanna get married to Dan Rather." And King Potato said, "You can't get married to Dan Rather; he's a commentator."

Reportedly told to drummer Matt Chamberlain by Bob Dylan once:

drjd · 04-01-2020, 01:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by doubleshuffle

A joke for the Spud who is keeping this thread going:

There was a royal potato family. You had King Potato, Queen Potato and Princess Potato. And Princess Potato wanted to get married to Dan Rather. And so she walked over to King Potato and asked him, "Father, I wanna get married to Dan Rather." And King Potato said, "You can't get married to Dan Rather; he's a commentator."

Many thanks from the entire Potatohood!

That certainly deserves a karma which I am unable to give now!

drjd · 04-01-2020, 01:26 PM

Due to the quarantine...
I’ll only be telling inside jokes.

wodin · 04-01-2020, 09:14 PM

Last week I tried out ten new puns to see if they'd make people laugh.

Spoiler:

drjd · 04-02-2020, 07:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wodin

Last week I tried out ten new puns to see if they'd make people laugh.

Spoiler:

Groan!

drjd · 04-02-2020, 07:24 AM

A blonde walks into a doctor's office and says, "Doc, I'm horribly sick!"

The doctor looks at her and asks, "Flu?"

"No, I drove here."

drjd · 04-03-2020, 08:32 AM

A man visits his doctor and complains that he feels like he has 5 legs.

The doctor asks him how do his pants fit?

The man replies, "Like a glove!"

drjd · 04-04-2020, 06:46 AM

Despite his immense success as a coffee seller he remained a grounded person.

doubleshuffle · 04-06-2020, 07:09 AM

Click image for larger version

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DMcCunney · 04-06-2020, 02:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by doubleshuffle

Attachment 178140

There is at least one known coyote in New York City's Central Park. It apparently got to Manhattan across one of the connecting bridges.

No reports of Wile E. behavior though.
______
Dennis

drjd · 04-07-2020, 08:08 AM

Where do Squirrels go during Hurricanes?

Pretty Much anywhere depending on how fast the wind is blowing.

drjd · 04-09-2020, 07:46 AM

A woman goes into a butcher's...

"I'd like an oxtail please".

"Certainly", replies the butcher, "Once upon a time there was an ox..."

drjd · 04-11-2020, 07:41 AM

I trained my dog to fetch me beer...
It may not sound too impressive, but he gets them from the neighbors fridge!

Bookpossum · 04-11-2020, 05:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by drjd

I trained my dog to fetch me beer...
It may not sound too impressive, but he gets them from the neighbors fridge!

drjd · 04-12-2020, 06:21 AM

Self isolation is getting so bad I’m starting to crush on my roommate...

And we’ve been married for more than 30 years.

04-01-2020, 09:14 PM	#10894
wodin Illiterate Posts: 10,279 Karma: 37848716 Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: The Sandwich Isles Device: Samsung Galaxy S10+, Microsoft Surface Pro	Last week I tried out ten new puns to see if they'd make people laugh. Spoiler: But no pun in ten did.

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03-31-2020, 04:40 AM	#10891
doubleshuffle Unicycle Daredevil Posts: 13,923 Karma: 185041098 Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: Planet of the Pudding Brains Device: Aura HD (R.I.P. After six years the USB socket died.) tolino shine 3	A joke for the Spud who is keeping this thread going: There was a royal potato family. You had King Potato, Queen Potato and Princess Potato. And Princess Potato wanted to get married to Dan Rather. And so she walked over to King Potato and asked him, "Father, I wanna get married to Dan Rather." And King Potato said, "You can't get married to Dan Rather; he's a commentator." Reportedly told to drummer Matt Chamberlain by Bob Dylan once:

04-01-2020, 01:26 PM	#10893
drjd The Couch Potato Posts: 34,509 Karma: 230999999 Join Date: Aug 2015 Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta	Due to the quarantine... I’ll only be telling inside jokes.

04-02-2020, 07:24 AM	#10896
drjd The Couch Potato Posts: 34,509 Karma: 230999999 Join Date: Aug 2015 Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta	A blonde walks into a doctor's office and says, "Doc, I'm horribly sick!" The doctor looks at her and asks, "Flu?" "No, I drove here."

04-03-2020, 08:32 AM	#10897
drjd The Couch Potato Posts: 34,509 Karma: 230999999 Join Date: Aug 2015 Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta	A man visits his doctor and complains that he feels like he has 5 legs. The doctor asks him how do his pants fit? The man replies, "Like a glove!"

04-04-2020, 06:46 AM	#10898
drjd The Couch Potato Posts: 34,509 Karma: 230999999 Join Date: Aug 2015 Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta	Despite his immense success as a coffee seller he remained a grounded person.

04-06-2020, 07:09 AM	#10899
doubleshuffle Unicycle Daredevil Posts: 13,923 Karma: 185041098 Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: Planet of the Pudding Brains Device: Aura HD (R.I.P. After six years the USB socket died.) tolino shine 3

04-07-2020, 08:08 AM	#10901
drjd The Couch Potato Posts: 34,509 Karma: 230999999 Join Date: Aug 2015 Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta	Where do Squirrels go during Hurricanes? Pretty Much anywhere depending on how fast the wind is blowing.

04-09-2020, 07:46 AM	#10902
drjd The Couch Potato Posts: 34,509 Karma: 230999999 Join Date: Aug 2015 Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta	A woman goes into a butcher's... "I'd like an oxtail please". "Certainly", replies the butcher, "Once upon a time there was an ox..."

04-11-2020, 07:41 AM	#10903
drjd The Couch Potato Posts: 34,509 Karma: 230999999 Join Date: Aug 2015 Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta	I trained my dog to fetch me beer... It may not sound too impressive, but he gets them from the neighbors fridge!

04-12-2020, 06:21 AM	#10905
drjd The Couch Potato Posts: 34,509 Karma: 230999999 Join Date: Aug 2015 Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta	Self isolation is getting so bad I’m starting to crush on my roommate... And we’ve been married for more than 30 years.