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Old 01-21-2017, 10:15 PM   #29491
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Lemon on paper cut! Lemon on paper cut! Oh, God! Call a Dr., STAT! *writhes in agony*
Sympathies.
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Old 01-22-2017, 10:33 AM   #29492
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I did--for about 10 seconds--consider warning you...
I got exactly what I wished for, so I shouldn't complain

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I think you're stuck asking. If you can't read her non-verbals (and perhaps she isn't giving off any!!), then...
I know the reason for the lack of hints and can account for it. Dates are going very well up to this point. Baby steps. After she warms up (each time anew), things start coasting. Slowly

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both parties must be performing the same dance with the same steps. If you're doing the Charleston, and she's doing the Lindy Hop, things just won't work out.
I know. We'll just invent an entirely new dance altogether. Slowly

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Old 01-22-2017, 01:25 PM   #29493
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I agree, they would be hilarious--ClientsfromHell.net-worthy--if they were happening to someone else. I just do NOT understand why he never though to ask me "Hey, do you read Greek?" Hell, if the book had BEEN in Greek, it would have crossed my mind. If he wasn't an expat, ditto. Just...never saw that one coming.
I'd rephrase that as "I just do NOT understand why he never thought.", since actual rational thought seems to have been absent from the start.
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Old 01-22-2017, 03:30 PM   #29494
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Your bill is confusing, but, crap, Blossom, you are paying more than 4x what we're paying. Per KWH. No matter how you do the math. Even more. I just don't understand how the HELL they can charge that, for such a cozy apartment.
It's Ameren. They have just notify us the rates will be going up again. Every summer they jack them up and now they are raising them up more permanently.



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Well...somebody allowed her to be that way in her life. Her parents, her husband (?), or, something. I mean, if you go through life not knowing how to budget, only a few possible scenarios, there. Either you have more than you need to accommodate cavalier spending, or you go bankrupt. Y'know?
She knows how to work the system.

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I don't want it if you're going to constantly tell me what to do with it, what I may do with it, what I can't, how I should use it, etc. That's not a gift. That's a contract with too many conditional clauses."
I agree and I'm sorry you had to deal with it too.



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The really crap part is how it's taken out on YOU. This goes back to the guilt, appeasement, and so forth. Stop listening to both of them.

<Snip≥
You GOTTA put your foot down. And with bipolars, it's crucial. They'll push you and push you and push you, like children, until they find your limit. You need to make that limit line early-before you get upset. I happen to have two bipolars that have married into my family and my husband's BIL's family (so, one married to my side, one to his...), so we see an awful lot of that.

I strongly recommend the loving-but-firm approach. It's worked for me and I hope it will work for you. I see you here, with this sort of emotional duress, often enough to know that this must be very debilitating for you. Try the Puppy Approach. (That's our code for it, in the fam).
This last week was an eye opener. I can say he hadn't eaten which was probably the main cause for the family drama. He gets real loopy when he skips meals. Sometimes weird, sometimes mean. He started throwing around the big D word. I know it's an idle threat. It's all he has left to try and manipulate me. It's a tactic he learned from his mother. I am not rattled easily. I have my Alcoholic bat $$*# crazy father to thank for that. You rant, rave, break things As long as they are not mine I'll just sit there blink, maybe shake my head. It ticks him off even more. He'll go on a verbal tirade for awhile and then get bored. Ten minutes later it's like a switch been flip he'll be laughing at the TV or his game. Talk to me as if nothing crazy just happened.

Thanks for your advice on the training them. I might have to try it.

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Good luck. Oh, and yeah--you need to call your State's Corporation Commission, (or the utilities commission, whoever oversees power and electric) and find out if you are being hosed. Those rates are CRAZY.

Hitch
Seeing the state just approved a rate hike. There likely nothing that can be done.

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Last edited by Blossom; 01-22-2017 at 03:34 PM.
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Old 01-22-2017, 03:44 PM   #29495
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I have many little traditions when staying at a vacation park; getting up early to get fresh bread rolls, reading horror books, watching horror films, going out to a nearby town (if it's easy to get to). I seem to have another tradition: burn my hand. All week I've been using the oven a lot, baking cookies, preparing dinner and tonight, when I took out my pizza I burned my hand against the top of the oven. I've burned myself several times during earlier stays.

I put my hand under running water for a while and it doesn't seem too bad. Though I thought that last time and it left a scar on my thumb.
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Old 01-22-2017, 03:49 PM   #29496
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I have many little traditions when staying at a vacation park; getting up early to get fresh bread rolls, reading horror books, watching horror films, going out to a nearby town (if it's easy to get to). I seem to have another tradition: burn my hand. All week I've been using the oven a lot, baking cookies, preparing dinner and tonight, when I took out my pizza I burned my hand against the top of the oven. I've burned myself several times during earlier stays.

I put my hand under running water for a while and it doesn't seem too bad. Though I thought that last time and it left a scar on my thumb.
Are using pot holders?

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Old 01-22-2017, 04:10 PM   #29497
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Are using pot holders?

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Yes, I brought my own so I didn't have to use a tea towel. It's stupid I manage to burn myself so often when I'm on vacation. It's not something I do regularly at home.

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Old 01-22-2017, 05:06 PM   #29498
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Old 01-22-2017, 05:20 PM   #29499
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Dat Bear Grills moment...
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Old 01-22-2017, 06:21 PM   #29500
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Old 01-22-2017, 06:42 PM   #29501
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It's Ameren. They have just notify us the rates will be going up again. Every summer they jack them up and now they are raising them up more permanently.





She knows how to work the system.



I agree and I'm sorry you had to deal with it too.





This last week was an eye opener. I can say he hadn't eaten which was probably the main cause for the family drama. He gets real loopy when he skips meals. Sometimes weird, sometimes mean. He started throwing around the big D word. I know it's an idle threat. It's all he has left to try and manipulate me. It's a tactic he learned from his mother. I am not rattled easily. I have my Alcoholic bat $$*# crazy father to thank for that. You rant, rave, break things As long as they are not mine I'll just sit there blink, maybe shake my head. It ticks him off even more. He'll go on a verbal tirade for awhile and then get bored. Ten minutes later it's like a switch been flip he'll be laughing at the TV or his game. Talk to me as if nothing crazy just happened.

Thanks for your advice on the training them. I might have to try it.



Seeing the state just approved a rate hike. There likely nothing that can be done.

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You desperately need to call for an energy assessment. It is obvious from your kw usage and the size of your apartment that you are either paying someone else's bill or you are paying for the entire building. Something is very wrong. Or you are burning incandescent lights and running both heaters and the stove almost non-stop.
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Old 01-23-2017, 07:15 PM   #29502
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Along with "What color is the sky on your planet?"
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Hitch, maybe you need to ask clients "what direction do electrons spin on your planet".
http://www.askamathematician.com/201...-way-is-right/
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Old 01-23-2017, 07:27 PM   #29503
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Hitch, maybe you need to ask clients "what direction do electrons spin on your planet".
http://www.askamathematician.com/201...-way-is-right/


I've had fun with similar concepts in the past, because just about everything is relative to something else. What happens when there is no something else to be relative to?

If you were magically transported to an empty universe, where you were the only thing in it that existed, the question of precisely where you were would be meaningless. So would how fast you were going if if you were in a spacecraft and gunned the engines to move, and the direction in which you were moving. (The fact that you were moving would have to be taken on faith, because there would be no way to measure and prove it.)

But in Hitch's case, I'd stick to color of sky. Electron spin would be rather beyond the client's knowledge.
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Old 01-23-2017, 07:32 PM   #29504
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You desperately need to call for an energy assessment. It is obvious from your kw usage and the size of your apartment that you are either paying someone else's bill or you are paying for the entire building. Something is very wrong.
Agreed, and that was my first thought. The utility should respond to that request. What you pay for the power you use may seem exorbitant, but they are generally fussy about being accurate about the amount you are billed for.

This looks to me like Blossom is paying for usage that she didn't do.
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Old 01-23-2017, 07:47 PM   #29505
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I want to dispute a $2.50 charge on my credit card. WHY do I have to call to do that????
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