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Old 11-13-2009, 02:33 PM   #61
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ralph Sir Edward View Post
Is everybody being entertained , so far? If so, look forward to the next episode of The Case of The Drowning Baptists, when you will get to read wire transcript of Red's conversation with the Secretary of State.

Coming soon to a thread near you.....
:tapsfootimpatiently: SO entertained !
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Old 11-13-2009, 02:38 PM   #62
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Originally Posted by zelda_pinwheel View Post
:tapsfootimpatiently: SO entertained !

Well, you just have to wait a little while. I have to clean the shower stall before the plumber is called Monday....

Life in Texas suburbia isn't all picking roses....
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Old 11-13-2009, 02:40 PM   #63
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Well, you just have to wait a little while. I have to clean the shower stall before the plumber is called Monday....

Life in Texas suburbia isn't all picking roses....
i can't believe red doesn't take precedence over cleaning the shower. where are your priorities, man ????
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Old 11-13-2009, 02:44 PM   #64
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i can't believe red doesn't take precedence over cleaning the shower. where are your priorities, man ????

Fixing a steady drip takes prioriity over adding to an occasional one....
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Old 11-13-2009, 02:48 PM   #65
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Fixing a steady drip takes prioriity over adding to an occasional one....
if it's dripping, are you sure you should really be wasting even more water by cleaning it ? (especially since it will probably need it even more after the plumber leaves !)
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Old 11-13-2009, 03:42 PM   #66
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Quote:
Originally Posted by zelda_pinwheel View Post
(wow, regular text looks minuscule after reading one of these chapters. you're playing with my mind here, sir.)
I agree.. I had to blink a few times, stare a little, blink a few more times and the regular type was in focus again.

Quote:
Originally Posted by badgoodDeb View Post
"Ten Hut!" (giggle....)
That one made me laugh out loud as I pictured it actually happening.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ralph Sir Edward View Post
Is everybody being entertained , so far? If so, look forward to the next episode of The Case of The Drowning Baptists, when you will get to read wire transcript of Red's conversation with the Secretary of State.

Coming soon to a thread near you.....
Definitely entertained and waiting for the story to continue...
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Old 11-13-2009, 08:05 PM   #67
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ralph Sir Edward View Post
Is everybody being entertained , so far? If so, look forward to the next episode of The Case of The Drowning Baptists, when you will get to read wire transcript of Red's conversation with the Secretary of State.

Coming soon to a thread near you.....
definitely being entertained - thank you
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Old 11-13-2009, 10:24 PM   #68
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<Taken from the security hidden

wire recordings of the conversation

between Red Edwards and the

Secretary of State. Not admissable

in a court of law. As this was not

a wiretap, only Red's side of the

conversation was recorded, along

with other comments in the room.

Gaps denoting the response from

the other end of the line are

denoted by matching double

arrows.>




<Red> I call this number, and I get

Kaitempi Kate?


<Jake> Well, this is the number I call

when I need to speak with her.

You should get a communication

officer who will patch you through

to her. And her name is not

Kaitempi Kate.

<Red> You're right, I shouldn't insult the

Kaitempi.


<Jake> Are you usually this respectful.


<Red> Naw, I prefer to call her somethin'

else, but I got enough anti-defamation

organizations on my back as it is. Did

you know there's a slime mold defense

league?


Strangled sound in the background,

turning into guffaws. Source not

identified...



<Jake> Just get on with it, before I find a

window to jump out of.



Sound of telephone number being

punched.



<>


<Red> I need to speak with the Secretary

of State.


<>


<Red> No this isn't Jake ------. This is

Red Edwards.


<>


<Red> This is an authorized call. I have

been authorized by Jake -----

to provide certain pertinent

information concerning the hostage

situation in San Antonio.

I need to provide it to the Secretary

of State personally.


<>


<Red> No, he's out reviewing the

situation right now. This is of critical

security importance. Can you scramble

the line when I get through?


<>


<Red> Good. I'll ask at this end.


<Red> Major, how do I scramble the line?


<Major Ruiz> You push that button there.


<Red> Thanks, Major. <To the line>

Ready at this end.


<>


<Red> On at this end.


<>


<Red> Receiving 5 by 5.



Short gap of no particular information.




<>


<Red> Howdy, Ms. ------. I need to

discuss this deal down here in San

Antonio.


<>


<Red> No, this isn't Jake -----. This

is Red Edwards.


<>


<Red> He had his reasons for delegating,

ma'am.


<>


<Red> That's awful drastic, ma'am.

Couldn't we settle for keelhauling?


<>


<Red> I agree this is serious business

and your time is important. Can I pass

on my information necessary for your

decision making process?


<>


<Red> I'm the negotiator down here for

the situation, workin' through the FBI.

I -


<>


<Red> I repectfully disagre-


<>


<Red> I know who you are, ma'am. Do

you know who I am.


<>


<Red> Can't we leave dead rats out of

this.


<>


<Red> SHUT UP, BIGMOUTH! ... I'm here

to save your backside, not fry it.

And I'm not Bill, I don't have to put

up with your <expletive deleted>.


<>


<Red> I dare real easily. I'm reportin'

straight The Prez on this one. He isn't

gonna take too kindly to your kibitzing

when I tell him.


<>


<Red> This ain't Mena. The Chicago

mob will step on your boys like Cartiff

on a toad. They threw you a bone to

shut you up as long as you behaved.

You know that and I do. They don't

take kindly to freelancing in Chi-Town.


<>


<Red> Yes, this is a secure line. I saw to

that right off.


<>


<Red> Obviously you're not a lady. I'm

only doing this a favor for Bubba.


<>


<Red> Yep, that Bubba. The one who

introduced you to the commodity broker,

and Lord knows who else.


<>


<Red> We're old buddies. We were out

fishin' when the Prez's call

came though. He might take

offense if I showed up missin'.


<>


<Red> That wasn't a threat, just an

observation, ma'am.


<>


<Red> Look, ma'am, you've got a busted

flush. Can't we just put this to sleep

without anybody getting hurt. It's

easier on everybody.


<>


<Red> I know you don't like them, but

another Wacko, and you can kiss

2016 bye-bye. You know how the

Republican would play it. Vote for

----- and die. It'll make Willie Horton

looks like Mother Theresa. And you

know they'll do it.


<>


<Red> I'm happy with not callin' the Prez

about this as long as you pull your

hands out of this deal. And that includes

any other A-teams you've got assigned

on this project.


<>


<Red> I'll need to see the faxed

stand-down orders.


<>


<Red> In a word, no.


<>


<Red> I'm don't think highly of any

ambitious politician, anywhere.


<>


<Red> 5 minutes, fine. And ma'am, try

and have a nice day, anyways.


<>


<Red> Look at the bright side, ma'am.

I leave here and my prize is

back to negotitation with religious

zealots. And it's my backside if it

doesn't work. The buck stomps here.


<>


<Red> Goodbye, Madame Secretary.



Phone hung up.




<Red> I hope I don't have to do that

one again soon. Anybody got a

Pearl? I need one after that.


<Apparently looks at watch>


<Red> OMG, it's 6 PM. I gotta get

back and feed the clowns and hostages.

Jake, here's the FBI phone number.

Call 'em when you get the stand-down

fax. If you or the Major want to come

by as observers, feel free to drop in.

I'm outta here...


Transcript ends here.

Last edited by Greg Anos; 12-09-2009 at 09:36 AM.
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Old 11-16-2009, 02:28 PM   #69
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Well, things are certainly getting hot on this case!
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Old 11-16-2009, 04:23 PM   #70
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Well, things are certainly getting hot on this case!

And there's more to come.... More twists and turns that the route to a politician's wallet...

So stay turned for the next episode of The Case Of the Drowning Baptists, coming evenutally to a thread near you...
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Old 11-17-2009, 04:16 PM   #71
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paaaahahaha !!!!

Quote:
<Red> That's awful drastic, ma'am.

Couldn't we settle for keelhauling?
meta-joke alert !!! meta-joke alert !!! bonus points for working in that totally unrelated reference. (not that any of them are technically related. still though...)

so when exactly is "eventually" ? i'd like a firm date, please.


ps i hope you'll make a concordance for this story too. did you know that this thread is actually the 4th result in google when you search for "kaitempi" ?
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Old 11-17-2009, 06:45 PM   #72
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paaaahahaha !!!!



meta-joke alert !!! meta-joke alert !!! bonus points for working in that totally unrelated reference. (not that any of them are technically related. still though...)
That's why I did it! I wanted to let the readers fill in their own angry politician cracks for Red to respond to. And I didn't want to get into any libel suits.....


Quote:
Originally Posted by zelda_pinwheel View Post
so when exactly is "eventually" ? i'd like a firm date, please.
So would I , but this is a public forum....


Quote:
Originally Posted by zelda_pinwheel View Post
ps i hope you'll make a concordance for this story too. did you know that this thread is actually the 4th result in google when you search for "kaitempi" ?
It's now 5th.... And yes, the word Kaitempi is the term for the Sirian Secret Police from the book Wasp by Eric Frank Russell. A really, really recommended read.... Think of it as Red as James Bond. (EFR worked with Ian Fleming during WWII in the British "dirty tricks" department, Fleming in the Europe branch and Russell in the Japan branch.)

I always make a concordance for each story, it's part of writing the story for me. That way you can see all the fun (or at least most of it) that I'm having writing the story.

There will be no work on Red until Saturday at the earliest. I have an interview Friday at lunch, must study for the tech interview. As a fellow It'er, you understand the needs.....
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Old 11-17-2009, 07:05 PM   #73
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<Jake> Just get on with it, before I find a
window to jump out of.
Another in-joke!! I saw it too, but didn't think to call Dibs on it!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ralph Sir Edward View Post
The buck stomps here.
Plus a great "taking responsibility" line!
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Old 11-17-2009, 07:52 PM   #74
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Another in-joke!! I saw it too, but didn't think to call Dibs on it!



Plus a great "taking responsibility" line!

Thank you, thank you, stomps is what usually happens when you take responsibility....
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Old 12-09-2009, 09:16 AM   #75
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I raced back to HQ. Even as I was running

from the car, I was punching Micah's

number.




"Temple Of God Annex. The sun is setting

but Christ is rising."


Panting, "Red here, pantin'. Is Micah

available?"


"Micah speaking. You're late, Red."


"I was dealin' with some Breckenridge

Elkin idiots. Just got back."


"I took the liberty to pitching over the

food list. Did you solve the

sniper problem?"


"Yep. Just some crossed jurisdictional

wires. I'm confirmed to be runnin'

the show at this end. And I don't

use snipers."


"When is the food?"


" Gimme a minute to check it out at

this end. I'll call you back in 5

minutes."



I thundered through the door.


The Hoover Doll sneered, "The

thundering herd..." At least

I think that was what he said.


"Never mind my showing up in

the Richter Scale. Is the

food here?"


“Over in the corner. The tele-

evangelist wants to talk

to you. He's out back.”


I wandered out back. The tele-

evangelist was talking to

skinny young guy I didn't

know.


"Who'se the new guy?"


"His name is Nate the Great. I asked

him to come along with me so that

he could take over the trolley work

later. I have sermons to write."


There was something vaguely familiar

with his appearance, but I couldn't

put a finger on it.


"Well, let me call Micah as clear it

with him."


I gave Micah a ring. Lo and behold

he actually answered. I guess food

was a motivator.


"What now, Red?"


"The tele-evagelist wants to bring along

an assistant. He's complaining that

he doesn't have enough time to

write Godly missives for his flock."


"Yes, he discussed it with me over lunch.

He can bring over one unarmed

assistant."


"Well. he won't have any weapons. God

granted him with a couple of arms

at birth."


"God doesn't like bad jokes."


"Just didn't want any misunderstandings.

Chow's coming in a couple of minutes."


I hung up and gave the tele-evangelist

the high sign. They loaded up the

trolley and pushed it over to the

brewery.



I filled in the Hoover doll about the sniper

hoo-rah.


"You didn't really tell the Secretary of

State to buzz off." He looked

concerned.


"Sure did. 'Bout time somebody did. No

wonder Bill was always cattin' around.

Y'all got a Pearl around here?"


Having taken care of the beverage

department, I looked out at where

the sniper was. I saw him backing

out, slowly There's something uplifting

about watching a competent

professional at work.


My thoughts were interrupted by a shout.


"Hey Red!, there's a Major Ruiz her at the

door to see you. "


"Let him in!"


Major Ruiz walked over and handed me a

fax. "Here's your official stand-down

orders."


"Thanks, Major. Want a Pearl?"


"How about a soda instead?"


"Sure", and I got him a soda (I'm not

getting paid any advertising money,

so no plug.) "That was a nice job,

watching the sergeant back out

from his position. Real smooth and

professional. I hope he doesn't

get marked down for my

spottin' him."


"He won't, Red. Will you need us around?"


"Major, I really hate to say no. These

things are so unpredictable. Have

you worked with the FBI before?:


"No."


"Hmmm. Major, let's use this as a joint

training exercise for both sides." I

waved over the Hoover Doll.


"Gentlemen, I'd like for you to pair up

your men for the rest of the

stand-off. I know it's not

normal, but I think both sides

can learn from each other. And

that'll be good for both groups.

However, we're gonna get the

T.O. straight from the get go.

The FBI has the legal authority,

and the Marines are just being

observers. Anything else would be

unconstitutional. Agreed?"


They both agreed. The hoover doll said,

"It's nice to see somebody trying

to follow the law around here."


"Easy, the Major was following order he

didn't particularly like." The Major

nodded. "Now, it's getting late and

I'm gettin' hungry. Does the FBI

budget extend to some more Sea

Island carry-out? And Major, would

you care to join us?"

Last edited by Greg Anos; 12-09-2009 at 09:35 AM.
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