Silliness Add/Read a good joke to lighten your day - Page 446

Fbone · 06-25-2013, 05:32 PM

The mother was furious. “Paul!” – she yelled. “Why are you making such awful faces at your bulldog?”

“Well, Mom, he started it!”

Freeshadow · 06-26-2013, 07:17 AM

Extra for pooh: (attached)

wannabee · 06-26-2013, 08:49 AM

What d'ya mean bad eyesight? There's nothin' wrong with my eyesight I tell ya'.
Look over there. That cat commin' in the door has only got one eye.

That cat, dear sir, is going out the door!

steven522 · 06-26-2013, 08:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by orlok

It doesn't matter how old you are, you know you haven't grown up yet when a duck quacks at you and you quack back.

Or you find yourself standing at a fence line yelling "Mooooo!" at a herd of cattle.

Fbone · 06-26-2013, 08:24 PM

A small boy ridiculed the talk about a painless dentist in his neighborhood. “He’s not painless at all.” – said the boy.

“He put his finger in my mouth and I bit it and he yelled just like anybody would."

steven522 · 06-27-2013, 11:19 AM

"...the truth will set you free."

Free from your contract at Food Network; free from your contract at Smithfield Hams; free from your contract at Wal-Mart...

Fbone · 06-27-2013, 01:29 PM

After the two turtles collided, the policeman asked the snail what he saw.

The snail said, "I don't know officer. It all happened so fast."

orlok · 06-27-2013, 02:00 PM

I've been trying to buy a train ticket online for over an hour now and I'm getting really annoyed.

It keeps asking me, 'Where do you want to go?'

So I click on the icon that says 'Home' and then it makes me start again.

yvanleterrible · 06-28-2013, 06:19 AM

Sometimes a good groan will get you karma. Because that groan can be the spark that wakes one up to a good start in the day...

Thanks to all who write here BTW.

wodin · 06-28-2013, 01:54 PM

A good groan!

Spoiler:

Fbone · 06-28-2013, 02:37 PM

To smash the atom,
all mankind was intent.
But someday,
the atom just may
return the compliment.

Fbone · 06-29-2013, 03:15 PM

A guy calls the hospital. He says, "You gotta send help! My wife's going into labor!"

The nurse says, "Calm down. Is this her first child?"

He says, "No! This is her husband!"

Fbone · 06-30-2013, 04:47 PM

A backwards poet writes inverse.

Bilbo1967 · 06-30-2013, 05:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fbone

A backwards poet writes inverse.

Does a writer who passes off prose as poetry to gullible readers write converse?

pilotbob · 07-01-2013, 12:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bilbo1967

Does a writer who passes off prose as poetry to gullible readers write converse?

I don't know... but...

If the opposite of con is pro, then is the opposite of congress, progress?

BOb

06-26-2013, 07:17 AM	#6677
Freeshadow temp. out of service Posts: 2,791 Karma: 24285242 Join Date: May 2010 Location: Duisburg (DE) Device: PB 623	Extra for pooh: (attached) Attached Thumbnails

06-28-2013, 01:54 PM	#6685
wodin Illiterate Posts: 10,279 Karma: 37848716 Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: The Sandwich Isles Device: Samsung Galaxy S10+, Microsoft Surface Pro	A good groan! Spoiler: Do I get my Karma?

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06-25-2013, 05:32 PM	#6676
Fbone Is that a sandwich? Posts: 8,189 Karma: 100500000 Join Date: Jun 2010 Device: Nook Glowlight Plus	The mother was furious. “Paul!” – she yelled. “Why are you making such awful faces at your bulldog?” “Well, Mom, he started it!”

06-26-2013, 08:49 AM	#6678
wannabee Media Bloke Posts: 2,381 Karma: 113956855 Join Date: Sep 2010 Location: NSW - Australia Device: iOS	What d'ya mean bad eyesight? There's nothin' wrong with my eyesight I tell ya'. Look over there. That cat commin' in the door has only got one eye. That cat, dear sir, is going out the door!

06-26-2013, 08:24 PM	#6680
Fbone Is that a sandwich? Posts: 8,189 Karma: 100500000 Join Date: Jun 2010 Device: Nook Glowlight Plus	A small boy ridiculed the talk about a painless dentist in his neighborhood. “He’s not painless at all.” – said the boy. “He put his finger in my mouth and I bit it and he yelled just like anybody would."

06-27-2013, 11:19 AM	#6681
steven522 binomial: homo legentem Posts: 1,061 Karma: 25222222 Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Alabama, USA Device: iriver Story HD; Archos 80 G9	"...the truth will set you free." Free from your contract at Food Network; free from your contract at Smithfield Hams; free from your contract at Wal-Mart...

06-27-2013, 01:29 PM	#6682
Fbone Is that a sandwich? Posts: 8,189 Karma: 100500000 Join Date: Jun 2010 Device: Nook Glowlight Plus	After the two turtles collided, the policeman asked the snail what he saw. The snail said, "I don't know officer. It all happened so fast."

06-27-2013, 02:00 PM	#6683
orlok Close to the Edit! Posts: 9,797 Karma: 267994408 Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: UK Device: Kindle Oasis, Amazon Fire 8", Kindle 6"	I've been trying to buy a train ticket online for over an hour now and I'm getting really annoyed. It keeps asking me, 'Where do you want to go?' So I click on the icon that says 'Home' and then it makes me start again.

06-28-2013, 06:19 AM	#6684
yvanleterrible Reborn Paper User Posts: 8,616 Karma: 15446734 Join Date: May 2006 Location: Que Nada Device: iPhone8, iPad Air	Sometimes a good groan will get you karma. Because that groan can be the spark that wakes one up to a good start in the day... Thanks to all who write here BTW.

06-28-2013, 02:37 PM	#6686
Fbone Is that a sandwich? Posts: 8,189 Karma: 100500000 Join Date: Jun 2010 Device: Nook Glowlight Plus	To smash the atom, all mankind was intent. But someday, the atom just may return the compliment.

06-29-2013, 03:15 PM	#6687
Fbone Is that a sandwich? Posts: 8,189 Karma: 100500000 Join Date: Jun 2010 Device: Nook Glowlight Plus	A guy calls the hospital. He says, "You gotta send help! My wife's going into labor!" The nurse says, "Calm down. Is this her first child?" He says, "No! This is her husband!"

06-30-2013, 04:47 PM	#6688
Fbone Is that a sandwich? Posts: 8,189 Karma: 100500000 Join Date: Jun 2010 Device: Nook Glowlight Plus	A backwards poet writes inverse.