Silliness Puns and groaners - Page 5

vivaldirules · 09-05-2009, 09:15 AM

zelda_pinwheel · 09-05-2009, 09:16 AM

aaarrg !!

derrell · 09-05-2009, 09:55 AM

I was going to start an Apathy Anonymous group, but why bother.

zelda_pinwheel · 09-05-2009, 01:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by derrell

I was going to start an Apathy Anonymous group, but why bother.

ShortNCuddlyAm · 09-05-2009, 01:58 PM

I'm sure these must have been posted before...

How does Bob Marley like his doughnuts?
Wi' jam in

What did Bob Marley say to the band when he got back to the studio with a box of doughnuts?
I hope you like jam in too.

WT Sharpe · 09-06-2009, 09:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sparrow

"I have lost all my Hungarian sheet music," said Tom listlessly.

I loved that one!

Just shows everybody how sick I am.

WT Sharpe · 09-06-2009, 09:51 AM

From the old Boy's Life magazine of my childhood:

Sign on a music store door: "Gone Chopin. Be Bach in a minuet."

ShortNCuddlyAm · 09-06-2009, 10:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WT Sharpe

From the Old Boy's Life magazine of my childhood:

Sign on a music store door: "Gone Chopin. Be Bach in a minuet."

I wonder if they had written down what they needed to buy, and if so, if that note was headed Chopin Liszt?

griffonwing · 09-06-2009, 11:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ShortNCuddlyAm

I wonder if they had written down what they needed to buy, and if so, if that note was headed Chopin Liszt?

hehe. If he and his wife split the Liszt up, they both have half-notes!

GeoffC · 09-06-2009, 11:53 AM

The dueller took the second sword from his second and then took a second to get his bearings before he took the second door out into the yard....

RWood · 09-06-2009, 01:03 PM

1. How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit?

Unique Up On It.

2. How Do You Catch a Tame Rabbit?

Tame Way.

3. How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest?

They Take The Psycho Path

4. How Do You Get Holy Water?

You Boil The Hell Out Of It!

5. What Do Fish Say When They Hit a Concrete Wall?

Dam!

6. What Do Eskimos Get From Sitting On The Ice too Long?

Polaroid's

7. What Do You Call a Boomerang That Doesn't work?

A Stick.

8. What Do You Call Cheese That Isn't Yours?

Nacho Cheese.

9. What Do You Call Santa's Helpers?

Subordinate Clauses.

10. What Do You Call Four Bullfighters In Quicksand?

Quattro Sinko.

11. What Do You Get From a Pampered Cow?

Spoiled Milk.

12. What Do You Get When You Cross a Snowman With a Vampire?

Frostbite.

13. What Lie s At The Bottom Of The Ocean And Twitches?

A Nervous Wreck.

14. What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup?

Anyone Can Roast Beef.

15. Where Do You Find a Dog With No Legs?

Right Where You Left Him.

16. Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils?

Because They Have Big Fingers.

17. Why Don't Blind People Like To Sky Dive?

Because It Scares The Dog.

18. What Kind Of Coffee Was Served On The Titanic?

Sanka.

19. What Is The Difference Between a Harley And a Hoover ?!

The Location Of The Dirt Bag.

20. Why Did Pilgrims' Pants Always Fall Down?

Because They Wore Their Belt Buckle On Their Hat.

21. What's The Difference Between a Bad Golfer And a Bad Skydiver?

A Bad Golfer Goes, Whack , Dang!
A Bad Skydiver Goes Dang! Whack .

22. How Are a Texas Tornado And a Tennessee Divorce The Same?

Somebody's Gonna Lose A Trailer

Slite · 09-07-2009, 10:08 AM

there is a rumour that J.K. Rowling is working on a new series, this one suposedly is about a really good golf-player.

Harry Putter i think his name was.

Sparrow · 09-07-2009, 10:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Slite

there is a rumour that J.K. Rowling is working on a new series, this one suposedly is about a really good golf-player.

Harry Putter i think his name was.

I've a sudden urge to use a mashie niblick myself after reading that!!

griffonwing · 09-07-2009, 10:49 AM

I think it was character-based on Bill Bailey.. Hairy Putter.

GeoffC · 09-07-2009, 11:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Slite

there is a rumour that J.K. Rowling is working on a new series, this one suposedly is about a really good golf-player.

Harry Putter i think his name was.

I refuse to react to the possibilities on that post .....

09-06-2009, 09:51 AM	#67
WT Sharpe Bah, humbug! Posts: 39,073 Karma: 157049943 Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Chesapeake, VA, USA Device: Kindle Oasis, iPad Pro, & a Samsung Galaxy S9.	From the old Boy's Life magazine of my childhood: Sign on a music store door: "Gone Chopin. Be Bach in a minuet." Last edited by WT Sharpe; 09-21-2009 at 03:22 AM.

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ShortNCuddlyAm WWHALD Posts: 7,879 Karma: 337114 Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Mitcham, Surrey, UK Device: iPad. Selling my silver 505 here	I'm sure these must have been posted before... How does Bob Marley like his doughnuts? Wi' jam in What did Bob Marley say to the band when he got back to the studio with a box of doughnuts? I hope you like jam in too.

09-06-2009, 11:53 AM	#70
GeoffC Chocolate Grasshopper ... Posts: 27,600 Karma: 20821184 Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Scotland Device: Muse HD , Cybook Gen3 , Pocketbook 302 (Black) , Nexus 10: wife has PW	The dueller took the second sword from his second and then took a second to get his bearings before he took the second door out into the yard....

09-06-2009, 01:03 PM	#71
RWood Technogeezer Posts: 7,233 Karma: 1601464 Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Virginia, USA Device: Sony PRS-500	1. How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit? Unique Up On It. 2. How Do You Catch a Tame Rabbit? Tame Way. 3. How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest? They Take The Psycho Path 4. How Do You Get Holy Water? You Boil The Hell Out Of It! 5. What Do Fish Say When They Hit a Concrete Wall? Dam! 6. What Do Eskimos Get From Sitting On The Ice too Long? Polaroid's 7. What Do You Call a Boomerang That Doesn't work? A Stick. 8. What Do You Call Cheese That Isn't Yours? Nacho Cheese. 9. What Do You Call Santa's Helpers? Subordinate Clauses. 10. What Do You Call Four Bullfighters In Quicksand? Quattro Sinko. 11. What Do You Get From a Pampered Cow? Spoiled Milk. 12. What Do You Get When You Cross a Snowman With a Vampire? Frostbite. 13. What Lie s At The Bottom Of The Ocean And Twitches? A Nervous Wreck. 14. What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup? Anyone Can Roast Beef. 15. Where Do You Find a Dog With No Legs? Right Where You Left Him. 16. Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils? Because They Have Big Fingers. 17. Why Don't Blind People Like To Sky Dive? Because It Scares The Dog. 18. What Kind Of Coffee Was Served On The Titanic? Sanka. 19. What Is The Difference Between a Harley And a Hoover ?! The Location Of The Dirt Bag. 20. Why Did Pilgrims' Pants Always Fall Down? Because They Wore Their Belt Buckle On Their Hat. 21. What's The Difference Between a Bad Golfer And a Bad Skydiver? A Bad Golfer Goes, Whack , Dang! A Bad Skydiver Goes Dang! Whack . 22. How Are a Texas Tornado And a Tennessee Divorce The Same? Somebody's Gonna Lose A Trailer

09-07-2009, 10:08 AM	#72
Slite Icanhasdonuts? Posts: 2,837 Karma: 532407 Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: Mölnbo, Sweden Device: Kobo Aura 2nd edition, Kobo Clara HD	there is a rumour that J.K. Rowling is working on a new series, this one suposedly is about a really good golf-player. Harry Putter i think his name was.

09-07-2009, 10:49 AM	#74
griffonwing Suave Swabby, Savvy? Posts: 1,602 Karma: 520350 Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: Harrison, ARrrr, USA - southern Ozark mountains Device: Slate Blue PEZ (Astak Pocket Pro), CVSCX-9300 Quad-band watch phone	I think it was character-based on Bill Bailey.. Hairy Putter.

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