02-12-2021, 04:56 AM | #11311 |
The Couch Potato
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I was lonely until I glued a coffee cup on top of my car.
Now everyone waves at me. |
02-16-2021, 05:42 AM | #11312 |
The Couch Potato
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extraterrestaurant, noun:
An eating place where you feel you've been abducted and experimented on. Also known as ETry. |
02-17-2021, 07:11 AM | #11313 |
Handy Elephant
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Sure enough, there were some conversational additives listed on the label for lemon juice concentrate. So then we had a long talk about possibly buying fresh lemons instead.
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02-18-2021, 05:05 AM | #11314 |
The Couch Potato
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intaxication, noun:
Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with. |
02-18-2021, 12:46 PM | #11315 |
Bibliophagist
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abscond, v.i.
To "move in a mysterious way," commonly with the property of another. |
02-18-2021, 03:58 PM | #11316 |
The Grand Mouse 高貴的老鼠
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Economist, n. Inexpensive fog.
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02-18-2021, 07:03 PM | #11317 |
Now what?
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02-19-2021, 05:29 AM | #11318 |
The Couch Potato
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cashtration, noun:
The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period. |
02-20-2021, 05:14 AM | #11319 |
The Couch Potato
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium? HeHe!
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02-20-2021, 04:13 PM | #11320 |
Bibliophagist
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Marriage is like a walk in the park... Jurassic Park.
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02-21-2021, 11:33 AM | #11321 |
The Couch Potato
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caterpallor, noun:
The color you turn after finding half a grub in the fruit you're eating. |
02-24-2021, 04:41 AM | #11322 |
The Couch Potato
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Did you hear about the suicidal homeopath?
He took 1/50th of the recommended dose! |
02-24-2021, 10:25 AM | #11323 |
Handy Elephant
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02-24-2021, 02:36 PM | #11324 |
Surfin the alpha waves ~~
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What do you get when you drop a piano on a small child?
Spoiler:
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02-25-2021, 04:37 AM | #11325 |
The Couch Potato
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Why is an 11-foot concert grand better than a studio upright?
Answer: Because it makes a much bigger boom when pushed off a cliff. |
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