Unutterably Silly Volunteer! Your Adrian Needs You!

[LazyScot]

Those of you following the Tales from Adrian's will possibly have noted the slight buildup of what might be misconstrued as defensive items. And then there was the brief appearance of the squirrels and their departure with the Christmas Tree.

Anyhow, I think it would now be good to found AAAA&A: Adrian's Array of Amazing Adventurers and Alcoholics. The goals of this group of fearless fellows and fellowettes (of whatever sex (including multiple and/or none at all), species, lifeform, entity, sapience or non-sapience, imaginary, or even one of those mythical real thingies) is to help defend Adrian's should it ever come under threat. Well, more threat than it normally poses to itself. Some of you may, given Adrian's habit of playing fast and loose with cause and effect, have received commissions in AAAA&A in the name of His Imprudent Majesty Adrian (or have been drafted, possibly via the pumps [I prefer the blue ones, myself] at the bar). Either way, I would greatly appreciate "volunteers", and if you can indicate the skillset you bring (e.g. BadGoodDebs might say "wielding and throwing of sharp pointy ouchy things")

Some of you may feel ill-suited to the more aggressive sides of defense. For those of you, several specialist divisions will be formed to cover catering, first aid, entertainment and morale support, committees and negotiations and last but definitely not least (and my own personal favourite) the hiding futilely in a place where you will be humorously found division.

Badges of office, as well as uniforms, can doubtless be purchased from Montsmags Enterprises, at a suitable premium at some non-specific, non-constant, Heisenberg-uncertainty-principle-style point in time.

[Greg Anos]

Well, I can pack my .22 if needed, but Adrian needs to stock Pearl at the bar....

Red

[DixieGal]

It's the holidays, so I think that I will

sit this one out and watch you puny

humans trample each other for a change.


Tis the season of giving, so I'm giving

the denizens of Adrian's place an

opportunity to obliterate each other.


THAT is my present to ME!


Ahhh, don't you just love this time of year?

[zelda_pinwheel]

i have been having a rather difficult month (in fact 2009 overall has been pretty mitigated, i'll be glad to see the back of it, and roll on 2010) so depending on the date of the offensive and my mood at the time i could possibly provide a nuclear-level black scowl and negative tolerance-level for any sort of guff (and i wouldn't bet much on a squirrel's chances in the face of it, depending on my mood, which should tell you something about the intensity). if i'm not in a bad mood at the time however i should probably volunteer for the "hiding futilely in a place where you will be humorously found" division. i suspect i'd be really good at that. then again, it's quite possible that any sort of squirrelesque offensive against my home-from-home, my haven, my adrian's bar would *put* me in a bad mood, in which case the fearful scowl would be at your disposal. i'll add that i am on something of a hair trigger these days so it probably wouldn't take much.

[montsnmags]

Originally Posted by LazyScot

...
Anyhow, I think it would now be good to found AAAA&A: Adrian's Array of Amazing Adventurers and Alcoholics.
...

Can it be AAAA&AA: Adrian's Array of Amazing Adventurers and Alcoholics Anonymous? Might get more of your Join-The-French-Foreign-Legion-To-Avoid-A-Sordid-Or-Tragic-Past types.

"G'day, my name is...umm, Magsnmonts, and I'm an Amazing Adventurer and Alcoholic. I bring piece...a piece of Will Ferrell's thigh, nicely slow-roasted in ZCD-concentrate and barely chewed by me at all. Want some?"

Originally Posted by Ralph Sir Edward

Well, I can pack my .22 if needed, but Adrian needs to stock Pearl at the bar....

Red

Red! Pull up your favourite bar-stool, my friend, comfortably worn into the shape of your buttocks after millenium of use (these may be future millenium...you know how Adrian's Bar works that timeline stuff). If you'll just check that .22 at the door, that'll be a white wine spritzer, in a cocktail glass with a little umbrella, right? Haha, I kid, I kid! We'd never disarm the disarming charm of our Red, even if we could. Here's your Pearl, served in your one-and-only, subtly-scintillating silicon skull of a pre-Cenozoic ur-squirrel, as you like it (or as you'll come to like it).

Cheers,
Marc

[Greg Anos]

Originally Posted by montsnmags

Can it be AAAA&AA: Adrian's Array of Amazing Adventurers and Alcoholics Anonymous? Might get more of your Join-The-French-Foreign-Legion-To-Avoid-A-Sordid-Or-Tragic-Past types.

"G'day, my name is...umm, Magsnmonts, and I'm an Amazing Adventurer and Alcoholic. I bring piece...a piece of Will Ferrell's thigh, nicely slow-roasted in ZCD-concentrate and barely chewed by me at all. Want some?"



Red! Pull up your favourite bar-stool, my friend, comfortably worn into the shape of your buttocks after millenium of use (these may be future millenium...you know how Adrian's Bar works that timeline stuff). If you'll just check that .22 at the door, that'll be a white wine spritzer, in a cocktail glass with a little umbrella, right? Haha, I kid, I kid! We'd never disarm the disarming charm of our Red, even if we could. Here's your Pearl, served in your one-and-only, subtly-scintillating silicon skull of a pre-Cenozoic ur-squirrel, as you like it (or as you'll come to like it).

Cheers,
Marc

Just as long as it's not served with an armadillo attached (that's Lone Star beer)....

[LazyScot]

Originally Posted by Ralph Sir Edward

Well, I can pack my .22 if needed, but Adrian needs to stock Pearl at the bar....

Red

I guess that might be a problem. Last time we tried to stock her at the bar she complained bitterly that the small fridge was not the best place to show off her, errr, ummm, unique selling points.

What?

Oh.

Well, I guess Adrian can pop over to one year or another and pick up a few hundred barrells -- do you have a particular year that it was brewing particularly well.

Originally Posted by DixieGal

It's the holidays, so I think that I will

sit this one out and watch you puny

humans trample each other for a change.


Tis the season of giving, so I'm giving

the denizens of Adrian's place an

opportunity to obliterate each other.


THAT is my present to ME!


Ahhh, don't you just love this time of year?

Excellent! I'll put you down for the Moral Support division (let's face it, with you behind us we'll never retreat....)

Originally Posted by zelda_pinwheel

i have been having a rather difficult month (in fact 2009 overall has been pretty mitigated, i'll be glad to see the back of it, and roll on 2010) so depending on the date of the offensive and my mood at the time i could possibly provide a nuclear-level black scowl and negative tolerance-level for any sort of guff (and i wouldn't bet much on a squirrel's chances in the face of it, depending on my mood, which should tell you something about the intensity). if i'm not in a bad mood at the time however i should probably volunteer for the "hiding futilely in a place where you will be humorously found" division. i suspect i'd be really good at that. then again, it's quite possible that any sort of squirrelesque offensive against my home-from-home, my haven, my adrian's bar would *put* me in a bad mood, in which case the fearful scowl would be at your disposal. i'll add that i am on something of a hair trigger these days so it probably wouldn't take much.

Brilliant. I shall add the "Scowl of Instant Roast Squirrell" to our list of defensive armaments. I am sure SIRS will be be most helpful. Though I'm a little worried about confusiong with RSE, but I'm sure we can manage that. And I'll have Sam on standby with Abba's greatest hits, just in case you're in a good mood.

Originally Posted by montsnmags

Can it be AAAA&AA: Adrian's Array of Amazing Adventurers and Alcoholics Anonymous? Might get more of your Join-The-French-Foreign-Legion-To-Avoid-A-Sordid-Or-Tragic-Past types.

"G'day, my name is...umm, Magsnmonts, and I'm an Amazing Adventurer and Alcoholic. I bring piece...a piece of Will Ferrell's thigh, nicely slow-roasted in ZCD-concentrate and barely chewed by me at all. Want some?"

For you, good Marc, we will create an anonymous division, and you will be known as Anonymous Marc, or Am. Clearly this may cause a little confusion with ShortNCuddly, but I don't doubt we can handle this. I'm a bit unclear whether you should be in the psychological incapacitation or the bio-chemical warfare wings of the anonymous division? Or perhaps we should just make you Major of the Anonymous Division....

Originally Posted by montsnmags

Red! Pull up your favourite bar-stool, my friend, comfortably worn into the shape of your buttocks after millenium of use (these may be future millenium...you know how Adrian's Bar works that timeline stuff). If you'll just check that .22 at the door, that'll be a white wine spritzer, in a cocktail glass with a little umbrella, right? Haha, I kid, I kid! We'd never disarm the disarming charm of our Red, even if we could. Here's your Pearl, served in your one-and-only, subtly-scintillating silicon skull of a pre-Cenozoic ur-squirrel, as you like it (or as you'll come to like it).

Cheers,
Marc

Are you sure that ur-squirrel has been round to reclaim its skull?

Originally Posted by Ralph Sir Edward

Just as long as it's not served with an armadillo attached (that's Lone Star beer)....

That's okay. Armadillos are not served with Pearl, but by Trebuchet...

[pshrynk]

Harv and Vivaldi are offering air support with the Goose. As long as the M.A.R.V.I.N. isn't in a mood.

Of course, Vera will serve as Intel Officer. She and Red could trade a few war stories while they're at it. Of course, she'd have to bring Biggles along to keep him out of mischief. I hope you've got a ball bin for him to play in.

[FlorenceArt]

I believe I still have a good supply of Self-Destructive Implosive Devices. Just put them in a corner and throw random innocuous remarks at them. I'll take care of the imploding, you'll never know what hit you. Oh, wait, did you mean the squirrels? Oops.

[kindlekitten]

sorry, been traveling and missed this...

anyway true xmas tree annihilation story!!!;

back in College, I was in ROTC. for me as many others, it became an alternate sorority/frat. these were the people we partied with, hung out with, got into trouble with and so on. we did also party with/at other frat houses. one wintry semester, one of the Squids (Navy ROTC) who was a DELTA member invited us (Army ROTC) for a Christmas party. it got VERY drunk. there were the way more than typical bras on the chandelier, panties on the elkhead, lampshades on the Marines sort of deal. I have some memories of that night including stopping one guy from sawing the legs off the piano as the piano bench was missing and his girlfriend was trying to play it sitting on the ground. things got really out of hand when those of us in the Ranger platoon decided to launch an offensive at the fireplace... Christmas tree ornaments were plucked from the tree, held in the perfect grenade position, the top pulled off while shouting "GRENADE!" and tossed into the fireplace. the lights were pulled off and the strings used to restrain Air Force Cadets and "other civilians" for their safety. when the tree was denuded as much as was possible (or clear to us in our rather altered state), it was then shoved into the fireplace, as far up the chimney as we could make it go (with a fire going in the fireplace). we were banned from that frat house after that

[pshrynk]

I think that that was rather harsh to get banned for something like that.

[kindlekitten]

I know!