11-28-2012, 12:08 PM | #5686 |
Nameless Being
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11-28-2012, 12:18 PM | #5687 |
Illiterate
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Location: The Sandwich Isles
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11-28-2012, 12:23 PM | #5688 |
FUBAR!
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Location: Woodstock, IL
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11-28-2012, 01:46 PM | #5689 |
Is that a sandwich?
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Device: Nook Glowlight Plus
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A mama mole, a papa mole, and a baby mole all live in a little mole hole.
One day the papa mole sticks his head out of the hole, sniffs the air and says,"Yum! I smell maple syrup!" The mama mole sticks her head out of the hole, sniffs the air and says "Yum! I smell honey!" The baby mole tries to stick his head out of the hole to sniff the air, but can't because the bigger moles are in the way so he says, "Geez, all I can smell is MOLASSES!" |
11-28-2012, 03:36 PM | #5690 |
binomial: homo legentem
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Location: Alabama, USA
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11-28-2012, 03:52 PM | #5691 |
Member Retired
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11-28-2012, 04:57 PM | #5692 |
Guru
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Location: Sweden
Device: Iriver Story
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11-28-2012, 06:45 PM | #5693 |
Opsimath
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Location: Chiang Mai, Northern Thailand
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11-28-2012, 09:18 PM | #5694 |
Opsimath
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A friend asked me; "At your ripe old age, what would you prefer to get - Parkinson's or Alzheimer's?"
I answered, "Definitely Parkinson's. Better to spill half an ounce of whisky than to forget where you keep the bottle!" Stitchawl |
11-29-2012, 06:48 AM | #5695 |
Guru
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It reminds me a joke I knew about Heaven...
But it can wait, I suppose. |
11-29-2012, 06:03 PM | #5696 |
Is that a sandwich?
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Karma: 100500000
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Device: Nook Glowlight Plus
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A father asks his 10-year-old son if he knows about the birds and the bees.
"I don't want to know!" the child says, bursting into tears. "Promise me you won't tell me!" Confused, the father asks what's wrong. "Oh, dad," the boy sobs. "When I was six, I got the 'There's no Santa speech'. At seven, I got the 'There's no Easter Bunny' speech. When I was eight, you hit me with the 'There's no tooth fairy' speech. "If you're going to tell me that grown ups don't really get laid, I'll have nothing left to live for!" |
11-29-2012, 11:37 PM | #5697 |
Reading and reading
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Device: Infibeam Pi, iPod Touch 4G, iPad Air 2, iPad mini 2, Oneplus One
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"Give it to me!" She yelled.
"I'm so wet, give it to me now!" She could scream all she wanted. I was keeping the umbrella. |
11-30-2012, 04:19 AM | #5698 |
Close to the Edit!
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Location: UK
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"I'm going out to scrape the car" said my wife this morning.
"Against what?" I asked. |
11-30-2012, 05:15 AM | #5699 |
Opsimath
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11-30-2012, 08:22 AM | #5700 |
Reading and reading
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From the car joke I remembered computer-generated joke. ("Computational humor" on Wikipedia)
Q: What is different between leaves and car? A: One you brush and rake, the other you rush and brake. |
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