Silliness Add/Read a good joke to lighten your day - Page 490

Bilbo1967 · 12-28-2013, 02:44 PM

Does this clown taste funny to you?

orlok · 12-28-2013, 03:20 PM

WT Sharpe · 12-28-2013, 06:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by orlok

I just made you a Facebook star!

Reposted!

Fbone · 12-28-2013, 10:09 PM

Stitchawl · 12-29-2013, 12:03 AM

The Teacher asked young Patrick Murphy: "What do you do at Christmas time?

Patrick addressed the class: "Well Ms. Jones, me and my twelve brothers and sisters go to midnight mass and we sing hymns; then we come home very late and we put mince pies by the back door and hang up our stockings. Then all excited, we go to bed and wait for Father Christmas to come with all our toys.

"Very nice Patrick," she said. "Now Jimmy Brown, what do you do at Christmas?"

Well, Ms. Jones, me and my sister also go to church with Mom and Dad and we sing carols and we get home ever so late. We put cookies and milk by the chimney and we hang up our stockings. We hardly sleep, waiting for Santa Claus to bring our presents.

Realizing there was a Jewish boy in the class and not wanting to leave him out of the discussion, she asked, "Now, Isaac Cohen, what do you do at Christmas?"

Isaac said, "Well, it's the same thing every year.... Dad comes home from the office. We all pile into the Rolls Royce; then we drive to Dad's toy factory. When we get inside, we look at all the empty shelves... And begin to sing: "What A Friend We Have In Jesus." Then we all go to the Bahamas ."

Stitchawl

Kumabjorn · 12-29-2013, 12:48 AM

Good one, has to be told by a Jew though in these pc times.

Stitchawl · 12-29-2013, 02:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kumabjorn

Good one, has to be told by a Jew though in these pc times.

I started as one. Actively for 13 years and two days. Inactively for the following 8 years. Then gave up on it as a religion. Only believe in it as a culture these days. Does that count?

Stitchawl

Kumabjorn · 12-29-2013, 05:03 AM

Good enough for me and all my pc cohorts.

pdurrant · 12-29-2013, 05:20 AM

Three logicians walk into a bar.
The publican asks "Do you three all want a beer?"

The first logician says "I don't know."
The second logician says "I don't know."
The third logician says "Yes."

(I think this is a joke. But perhaps only for logicians. For those who think it's more like a logic puzzle, the explanation is in spoilers:

Spoiler:

)

Stitchawl · 12-29-2013, 05:58 AM

I'd call it a joke. Perhaps not a belly-laugh joke, but it raised a smile...

Stitchawl

orlok · 12-29-2013, 07:23 AM

I needed the explanation, and then yes, I did find it amusing.

yvanleterrible · 12-29-2013, 08:26 AM

One thing sure is that they are not drinking buddies. Nor Canadian.

Stitchawl · 12-29-2013, 10:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stitchawl

I'd call it a joke. Perhaps not a belly-laugh joke, but it raised a smile...

Stitchawl

Quote:

Originally Posted by orlok

I needed the explanation, and then yes, I did find it amusing.

Perhaps it's one of those that, in the old movies, the listener smiles and says;
"how droll!"

Stitchawl

Kumabjorn · 12-29-2013, 10:41 AM

Sounds like it could have been a scene in House M.D.

guanaco · 12-29-2013, 08:14 PM

Another of logicians

A logician's wife is having a baby.
The doctor immediately hands the newborn to the dad. The wife says, "Is it a boy or a girl?"
The logician says, "Yes."

12-29-2013, 05:20 AM	#7344
pdurrant The Grand Mouse 高貴的老鼠 Posts: 71,511 Karma: 306214458 Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Norfolk, England Device: Kindle Voyage	Three logicians walk into a bar. The publican asks "Do you three all want a beer?" The first logician says "I don't know." The second logician says "I don't know." The third logician says "Yes." (I think this is a joke. But perhaps only for logicians. For those who think it's more like a logic puzzle, the explanation is in spoilers: Spoiler: The first one knows he wants a beer, but doesn't know about the other two, so says "I don't know". The second also wants a beer, and knows that the first wants a beer (as otherwise the first one would have said "No"), but doesn't know about the third. The third one also wants a beer, and now knows that the other two also want beers, so says "Yes." )

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12-28-2013, 02:44 PM	#7336
Bilbo1967 Not scared! Posts: 13,424 Karma: 81011643 Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Midlands, UK Device: Kindle Paperwhite 10, Huawei M5 10	Does this clown taste funny to you?

12-28-2013, 03:20 PM	#7337
orlok Close to the Edit! Posts: 9,797 Karma: 267994408 Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: UK Device: Kindle Oasis, Amazon Fire 8", Kindle 6"

12-28-2013, 10:09 PM	#7339
Fbone Is that a sandwich? Posts: 8,189 Karma: 100500000 Join Date: Jun 2010 Device: Nook Glowlight Plus

12-29-2013, 12:03 AM	#7340
Stitchawl Opsimath Posts: 12,344 Karma: 187123287 Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Chiang Mai, Northern Thailand Device: Sony PRS-650, iPhone 5, Kobo Glo, Sony PRS-350, iPad, Samsung Galaxy	The Teacher asked young Patrick Murphy: "What do you do at Christmas time? Patrick addressed the class: "Well Ms. Jones, me and my twelve brothers and sisters go to midnight mass and we sing hymns; then we come home very late and we put mince pies by the back door and hang up our stockings. Then all excited, we go to bed and wait for Father Christmas to come with all our toys. "Very nice Patrick," she said. "Now Jimmy Brown, what do you do at Christmas?" Well, Ms. Jones, me and my sister also go to church with Mom and Dad and we sing carols and we get home ever so late. We put cookies and milk by the chimney and we hang up our stockings. We hardly sleep, waiting for Santa Claus to bring our presents. Realizing there was a Jewish boy in the class and not wanting to leave him out of the discussion, she asked, "Now, Isaac Cohen, what do you do at Christmas?" Isaac said, "Well, it's the same thing every year.... Dad comes home from the office. We all pile into the Rolls Royce; then we drive to Dad's toy factory. When we get inside, we look at all the empty shelves... And begin to sing: "What A Friend We Have In Jesus." Then we all go to the Bahamas ." Stitchawl

12-29-2013, 12:48 AM	#7341
Kumabjorn Basculocolpic Posts: 4,356 Karma: 20181319 Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Sweden Device: Kindle 3 WiFi, Kindle 4SO, Kindle for Android, Sony PRS-350 and PRS-T1	Good one, has to be told by a Jew though in these pc times.

12-29-2013, 05:03 AM	#7343
Kumabjorn Basculocolpic Posts: 4,356 Karma: 20181319 Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Sweden Device: Kindle 3 WiFi, Kindle 4SO, Kindle for Android, Sony PRS-350 and PRS-T1	Good enough for me and all my pc cohorts.

12-29-2013, 05:58 AM	#7345
Stitchawl Opsimath Posts: 12,344 Karma: 187123287 Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Chiang Mai, Northern Thailand Device: Sony PRS-650, iPhone 5, Kobo Glo, Sony PRS-350, iPad, Samsung Galaxy	I'd call it a joke. Perhaps not a belly-laugh joke, but it raised a smile... Stitchawl

12-29-2013, 07:23 AM	#7346
orlok Close to the Edit! Posts: 9,797 Karma: 267994408 Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: UK Device: Kindle Oasis, Amazon Fire 8", Kindle 6"	I needed the explanation, and then yes, I did find it amusing.

12-29-2013, 08:26 AM	#7347
yvanleterrible Reborn Paper User Posts: 8,616 Karma: 15446734 Join Date: May 2006 Location: Que Nada Device: iPhone8, iPad Air	One thing sure is that they are not drinking buddies. Nor Canadian.

12-29-2013, 10:41 AM	#7349
Kumabjorn Basculocolpic Posts: 4,356 Karma: 20181319 Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Sweden Device: Kindle 3 WiFi, Kindle 4SO, Kindle for Android, Sony PRS-350 and PRS-T1	Sounds like it could have been a scene in House M.D.

12-29-2013, 08:14 PM	#7350
guanaco Recovering reader Posts: 222 Karma: 8008008 Join Date: Jun 2012 Location: México Device: iPad	Another of logicians A logician's wife is having a baby. The doctor immediately hands the newborn to the dad. The wife says, "Is it a boy or a girl?" The logician says, "Yes."