Worst narrator ever?

[pidgeon92]

I've heard a few bad ones, but Donna Tartt, reading her book The Secret History, has committed a crime against humanity. I plodded through an hour, and I had to give up. Why a woman with a Southern accent would read a first-person narrative of a man from California boggles the mind. One of the other reviewers who managed to plod all the way through claims she even yawns during the performance (the book is 22+ hours).

Thankfully a professional was hired to narrate The Goldfinch, and he was one of the best narrators I've listened to.

Who else do we need to avoid?

[Catlady]

I've made it a point to avoid authors narrating their own books. I made an exception for Peter S. Beagle reading The Last Unicorn, and while he was OK, I wish a professional narrator would redo it.

Some of the LibriVox narrators are ... not good, shall we say, but they're volunteers, so I'm not going to dump on them.

[Synamon]

William Dufris reading Holmes on the Range was painful, I gave up after an hour. Slow with an awful fake cowboy twang, it twanged on my nerves. I've sampled some of his other readings, they were slow too, so he's on my avoid list.

I'm also not fond of Dick Hill. His gravelly monotone voice works for '50 PI stuff, but nothing else.

[FizzyWater]

You know, it may be - for at least some of them - it's going to be pretty subjective. I happen to know that a couple of the narrators that drive me crazy are favorites of at least one of the regular posters over on the Free/Bargain Romance thread.

I actually recently posted a bad narrator review on Audible's page for the book The Hot Zone by Jayne Castle. I listed to at least part of another book (The Nazi Officer's Wife) by the same narrator and for that book she was fine, but she butchered this one! To me, she sounded like she was doing a William Shatner impression. On top of that, she sounds to be an older woman who probably smokes (I can picture her with a rocks glass and a cigarette) - and the main character is in her 20s. It's just too, too distracting.

[tubemonkey]

When I have multiple choices for the same book, I generally avoid females and anyone with pronounced accents. It's not a sexist thing, but I frequently find females to be too soft spoken or the wrong gender to be narrating a male dominated action-adventure. But for some titles, female narrators are preferred.

[FizzyWater]

Originally Posted by tubemonkey

When I have multiple choices for the same book, I generally avoid females and anyone with pronounced accents. It's not a sexist thing, but I frequently find females to be too soft spoken or the wrong gender to be narrating a male dominated action-adventure. But for some titles, female narrators are preferred.

I can see why this would be true - I know I prefer women narrators for romance and urban fantasy novels. For genres like urban fantasy or romantic suspense or even just female-centric suspense, I do prefer women with generally deeper voices - like Susan Ericksen, who narrates the JD Robb In Death mysteries. I think it makes their male voices more believable.

[Catlady]

I'm not a fan of Scott Brick narrating thrillers. I also didn't much care for David Suchet narrating Mysterious Affair at Styles.

[jgaiser]

Originally Posted by tubemonkey

When I have multiple choices for the same book, I generally avoid females and anyone with pronounced accents.

Ahh... But you *cannot* listen to a Patrick O'Brian novel (Aubrey/Maturin series) with anything but an British accent. Just doesn't work.

[tubemonkey]

Originally Posted by jgaiser

Ahh... But you *cannot* listen to a Patrick O'Brian novel (Aubrey/Maturin series) with anything but an British accent. Just doesn't work.

Totally agree with you on that. But a British accent for Zane Grey or a southern accent for Doctor Who are both out of the question.

[AnemicOak]

Some of the worst books I've listened to were ones narrated by the author. It's not always the case but often I find them horrible.

[Loosheesh]

Originally Posted by Catlady

I also didn't much care for David Suchet narrating Mysterious Affair at Styles.

Same here. I'd previously watched a few episodes of the Poirot TV series and his reading of the book reminded me too much of his role in the series, which I try to keep, in my mind, quite distinct from the books. It was simply too distracting and I had to eventually give it up in favor of actually reading the book.

Originally Posted by AnemicOak

Some of the worst books I've listened to were ones narrated by the author. It's not always the case but often I find them horrible.

I agree heartily. The majority of them should just write the book and leave it that

[rxmom03]

Originally Posted by Catlady

I've made it a point to avoid authors narrating their own books. I made an exception for Peter S. Beagle reading The Last Unicorn, and while he was OK, I wish a professional narrator would redo it.

I will also make an exception if they are reading their autobiography. I bought John McCain's book "Faith of My Fathers" on Audible. And while he shouldn't quit his day job, it was interesting to hear him tell his story.

Mary

[Rich_D]

I don't remember the book but the narrator had, for lack of a better term, a very wet mouth. It sounded like he was slurping half his words. I also try and stay away from books narrated by the author.

[Laurablue]

Interesting thread, I just listened to True Grit narrated by Donna Tartt, and thought it was a wonderful performance. (I see it has some poor reviews on Audible, but the complaints I read were about intermittent swallowing and non-verbal mouth sounds - I could hear those when I used a good pair of headphones but not with regular earbuds). She did an amazing job of bringing Mattie Ross to life in this story.

I almost couldn't finish an audiobook narrated by William Dufris. I don't think it was just his narration, because I found the protagonist of the book annoying, and didn't like the way the plot was handled, but his reading style didn't make the book easier to follow or more enjoyable. In contrast, I'm listening to the Rho Agenda series narrated by McLeod Andrews, and his reading makes it easier to overlook some of the annoying features of the book.

[Hampshire Nanny]

Originally Posted by Catlady

I've made it a point to avoid authors narrating their own books. I made an exception for Peter S. Beagle reading The Last Unicorn, and while he was OK, I wish a professional narrator would redo it.

Originally Posted by AnemicOak

Some of the worst books I've listened to were ones narrated by the author. It's not always the case but often I find them horrible.

Originally Posted by Loosheesh

I agree heartily. The majority of them should just write the book and leave it that

I'll endorse two exceptions: Simon Winchester and Jack Weatherford. Their books are non-fiction and both authors have experience as public speakers. Winchester is a former broadcaster and Weatherford is a professor. So the audiobooks are delightful to listen to.

The worst narrator I've listened to was Kathleen Turner reading Elizabeth Peters' <b><i>Night Train to Memphis</i></b>, 5th in her Vicky Bliss mystery series. I never finished the first cassette (yes, this was a while ago).