Kittenhood: Orientation ~ Must-read for kittens everywhere

Marseille · 11-20-2012, 06:09 PM

Kittenhood: Orientation at Amazon
By Socks McDuff (@SocksMcDuff)

Quote:

Kittens are born into a strange and fascinating environment that can quickly become terrifying without a helping paw. Why is your primate holding a tiny superhero costume in front of you and smiling? What you should do about it? Kittenhood: Orientation should be the first book every kitty reads.

At around 27 pages in length, this tome may stretch the average kitten's attention span to the breaking point, but the treasure trove of intel it contains is worth the trouble. The vast intellectual wasteland before you is known as humanity, and your sojourn in their presence is not a punishment. You are the vanguard of the future. You are the hope of the earth. And you are not alone.

Socks McDuff, spymaster and author, lived a life of espionage before dedicating his life to training you, the next generation of covert operatives. While other cats might spend their retirement resting their harbles in a nice sunspot, Socks will not rest (more than 19 hours a day) until his task is complete.

kennyc · 11-21-2012, 07:03 AM

Looks interesting David. And interestingly I just ran across this yesterday and thought it hilarious (poems by cats): http://www.amazon.com/Could-Pee-This...ref=pd_sim_b_6

Marseille · 11-21-2012, 03:52 PM

Thanks Kenny. I've noticed you post regularly in the poetry thread, so I'm not surprised that ebook appeals to you. He definitely nailed the title.

[promotion deleted - MODERAT0R]

Marseille · 12-08-2012, 05:19 PM

Kittenhood is free today.

http://www.amazon.com/Kittenhood-Ori...dp/B00AA6CPZW/

Byrdie · 12-08-2012, 06:07 PM

Seeing a price tag here, did I miss it already?

kennyc · 12-08-2012, 06:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Byrdie

Seeing a price tag here, did I miss it already?

Showing $0 here. Colorado, usa

Marseille · 12-08-2012, 08:18 PM

I just did a quick survey of world amazon sites, it shows free everywhere I checked except Canada. I haven't the vaguest idea why. AFAIK, Amazon doesn't even let you localize promotions.

nookkatz · 12-09-2012, 12:24 AM

Tuxedo cat #3 (too new to be in my avatar) thanks you for the freebie!

Marseille · 12-09-2012, 12:39 AM

Awww

Gotta love that new tux smell

Marseille · 12-27-2012, 04:23 PM

Kittenhood is free again today:

http://www.amazon.com/Kittenhood-Ori...dp/B00AA6CPZW/

poohbear_nc · 12-27-2012, 07:46 PM

Having been (willingly) owned by cats all my life, I eagerly opened this tome to learn the secrets hidden from me all these years .... and found my head nodding as I turned the pages ....

[I MUST hide this from my cats .... they can't know that I have learned about their deepest secrets]

Well done!

shakeitsalome · 12-27-2012, 10:27 PM

Oh my goodness this was one of the funniest things I've read in a long time!

Sheamus, our newest, sends his thanks for the vital information. I now tremble in fear of what he has learned.

Marseille · 12-28-2012, 12:13 AM

I've been both a willing and unwilling ward of kitties, and I've decided it's better to just embrace it. Resistance is futile.

Thank you both (and Sheamus too!) for the kind words.

Marseille · 02-13-2013, 09:36 AM

Kittenhood is free today:

http://www.amazon.com/Kittenhood-Ori.../dp/B00AA6CPZW

Marseille · 02-26-2013, 12:23 PM

Kittenhood is free today:

http://www.amazon.com/Kittenhood-Ori.../dp/B00AA6CPZW

Quote:

Originally Posted by excerpt

The life of a kitten hangs on a precipice between the heights of catness, with all the imperial power that implies, and your bottomless desire for snuggles. In time you'll understand there's no true conflict between the two. Your subjects owe you snuggles and you owe them nothing in return. Until your emotions mature sufficiently to support the enormous ego you will one day carry, your knowledge of this truth may stand in conflict with your feelings. This is a just stage of your existence and is nothing to be too ashamed of, but you must take care not to let it interfere with your ultimate lot in life.

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11-21-2012, 07:03 AM	#2
kennyc The Dank Side of the Moon Posts: 35,872 Karma: 118716293 Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Denver, CO Device: Kindle2; Kindle Fire	Looks interesting David. And interestingly I just ran across this yesterday and thought it hilarious (poems by cats): http://www.amazon.com/Could-Pee-This...ref=pd_sim_b_6

11-21-2012, 03:52 PM	#3
Marseille Guru Posts: 687 Karma: 5700000 Join Date: Dec 2009 Device: kindle	Thanks Kenny. I've noticed you post regularly in the poetry thread, so I'm not surprised that ebook appeals to you. He definitely nailed the title. [promotion deleted - MODERAT0R] Last edited by Dr. Drib; 11-21-2012 at 04:17 PM.

12-08-2012, 05:19 PM	#4
Marseille Guru Posts: 687 Karma: 5700000 Join Date: Dec 2009 Device: kindle	Kittenhood is free today. http://www.amazon.com/Kittenhood-Ori...dp/B00AA6CPZW/

12-08-2012, 06:07 PM	#5
Byrdie Walking Library Posts: 234 Karma: 3869938 Join Date: Sep 2012 Location: Canada Device: Kobo Libra H20, Kindle Paperwhite 5, 16 gb version	Seeing a price tag here, did I miss it already?

12-08-2012, 08:18 PM	#7
Marseille Guru Posts: 687 Karma: 5700000 Join Date: Dec 2009 Device: kindle	I just did a quick survey of world amazon sites, it shows free everywhere I checked except Canada. I haven't the vaguest idea why. AFAIK, Amazon doesn't even let you localize promotions.

12-09-2012, 12:24 AM	#8
nookkatz Tuxedo Cats! Posts: 210 Karma: 1033575 Join Date: Aug 2010 Device: Nooks and iThings	Tuxedo cat #3 (too new to be in my avatar) thanks you for the freebie!

12-09-2012, 12:39 AM	#9
Marseille Guru Posts: 687 Karma: 5700000 Join Date: Dec 2009 Device: kindle	Awww Gotta love that new tux smell

12-27-2012, 04:23 PM	#10
Marseille Guru Posts: 687 Karma: 5700000 Join Date: Dec 2009 Device: kindle	Kittenhood is free again today: http://www.amazon.com/Kittenhood-Ori...dp/B00AA6CPZW/

12-27-2012, 07:46 PM	#11
poohbear_nc Now what? Posts: 58,772 Karma: 135181808 Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Durham, NC Device: Every Kindle Ever Made & To Be Made!	Having been (willingly) owned by cats all my life, I eagerly opened this tome to learn the secrets hidden from me all these years .... and found my head nodding as I turned the pages .... [I MUST hide this from my cats .... they can't know that I have learned about their deepest secrets] Well done!

12-27-2012, 10:27 PM	#12
shakeitsalome Member Posts: 11 Karma: 510000 Join Date: Nov 2012 Device: K4NT(Black)	Oh my goodness this was one of the funniest things I've read in a long time! Sheamus, our newest, sends his thanks for the vital information. I now tremble in fear of what he has learned.

12-28-2012, 12:13 AM	#13
Marseille Guru Posts: 687 Karma: 5700000 Join Date: Dec 2009 Device: kindle	I've been both a willing and unwilling ward of kitties, and I've decided it's better to just embrace it. Resistance is futile. Thank you both (and Sheamus too!) for the kind words.

02-13-2013, 09:36 AM	#14
Marseille Guru Posts: 687 Karma: 5700000 Join Date: Dec 2009 Device: kindle	Kittenhood is free today: http://www.amazon.com/Kittenhood-Ori.../dp/B00AA6CPZW