What does it mean to "befriend" someone here?

[GA Russell]

If I go to someone's User Page and befriend him, what happens that doesn't already happen anyway?

[dreams]

Originally Posted by GA Russell

If I go to someone's User Page and befriend him, what happens that doesn't already happen anyway?

You get a picture of their avatar on your profile page under friends..

Good question, K to you.
I was going to try and answer this, but MR's FAQ's has a better explaination than I could give.
Check it out here..

[GA Russell]

Thanks for that link, dreams, but it still doesn't explain what happens. Why would anyone want to befriend someone?

[dreams]

I find that it is a quick way to find out who is online when I am by using the "open contacts popup", under quick links.
I sometimes need information for help posts or threads that I am making and I can send a quick message.

[GA Russell]

Originally Posted by dreams

I can send a quick message.

OK, that makes sense!

Thanks dreams. Judging from the number of views this thread got so quickly, it looks like I wasn't the only one who wanted to know!

[pshrynk]

If you are a friend or a contact, you can also go to the friend's home page by clicking on their avatar. It's a short cut to post a message on the page or to post a private message.

[beppe]

Originally Posted by GA Russell

If I go to someone's User Page and befriend him, what happens that doesn't already happen anyway?

I have a similar question. The answer that was given was essentially it is easier/ faster to send messages.

But I am further asking: is there a special meaning to befriend a member, is there an unwritten code of behavior?

Someone asks me to become friend. I accept. But a part from the exanges of the offer and acceptance there are no further easier/faster messages. Obviously there must something beside the easier/faster messages. Then I reason like this: I was asked to be friend because I did something that was appreciated, something like a moral super karma and the avatar in the profile page is like a medal. It is more than that as it shows the affinities.

More questions:
I think that it is reasonable to oblige the status as indicated by the posts/karma counters. Like in real life, it is to the senior to offer to the junior the first name calling convention, a form of intimacy, not the way around. This leads right to my last question.The one that motivated my posting.

Is there a sense of real life friendship in the befriend process. Does it imply a desire to become friends? Or it just a super karma, or a communication improvement. How do members behave on this? Everyone for himself and what happens happens. Is it just a door that opens among two members and then it is up to them to do what they want with it?

Bear patience and please try to answer.

[dreams]

beppee, I've never really given it too much thought.

It does make it easier to just click on the person that is on your list of friends on your profile page and send a message.

You can also use the Quick Links to open a dropdown menu and choose "Open Contacts Popup". A window opens that lists all your Contacts (friends) and lets you know if they are online now.

Anyone can ask anyone else to be a "friend" (you don't have to accept or even ask anyone). I've had new members ask me and I've asked more senior members.

Personal belief determines whether you consider that person a true "friend" or not. I have many "friends" in my life outside MR, but they are only called that because I know them better than others. I would classify most of them as an "acquaintance" (Knowledge of a person acquired by a relationship less intimate than friendship.) Others, I classify as true friends, as we have known each other for years and been supportive of each other through the various ups and downs in our respective lives. We can call and/ or come visit whatever the time of the day or night if we need help or support. (plus, I just know that a true friend would help you "hide the dead body". <-- I read that somewhere and loved it.

[pshrynk]

The friends function is really just for easier contacting if you want to send a private message or go to that person's page to leave a public message. No obligation is implied.

[beppe]

Originally Posted by dreams

beppee, I've never really given it too much thought.

It does make it easier to just click on the person that is on your list of friends on your profile page and send a message.

You can also use the Quick Links to open a dropdown menu and choose "Open Contacts Popup". A window opens that lists all your Contacts (friends) and lets you know if they are online now.

Anyone can ask anyone else to be a "friend" (you don't have to accept or even ask anyone). I've had new members ask me and I've asked more senior members.

Personal belief determines whether you consider that person a true "friend" or not. I have many "friends" in my life outside MR, but they are only called that because I know them better than others. I would classify most of them as an "acquaintance" (Knowledge of a person acquired by a relationship less intimate than friendship.) Others, I classify as true friends, as we have known each other for years and been supportive of each other through the various ups and downs in our respective lives. We can call and/ or come visit whatever the time of the day or night if we need help or support. (plus, I just know that a true friend would help you "hide the dead body". <-- I read that somewhere and loved it.

Thank you dear dreams, for the prompt answer.
As always, you are very generous. Now I know what you think of the subject. It is a contact with an avatar in your profile page, plus some privilege like seeing the albums that you allow. I am not saying what I think as I want to see more responses.

In real life, whom different people call friend is quite articulate. For my daughter (the adult one) almost everybody she is on speaking terms with is a friend. For me it is the way around, I think that I have no more than almost 5 of them overall, and I consider myself very lucky and rich in friendships. The others are people that I know with different degrees of familiarity and intimacy. But that I would never help with the dead body. Friends and true friends.

Here I am on friendly terms with a number of members. You being one, as you well know. I disagreed with you only once.

My point is that I do not have any experience with forums - this is my first and only - and I prefer to make the right moves. That is I do not want to give more value to something that does not have it, and at the same time I do not want to do the reciprocal mistake, that is to treat with excessive lightness something that could be valuable.

Ciao dreams, thanks again

[beppe]

Originally Posted by pshrynk

The friends function is really just for easier contacting if you want to send a private message or go to that person's page to leave a public message. No obligation is implied.

Thank you pshrynk. That is what the book says. A reciprocal contact. It is indeed a system function.
No implication of appreciation or inclination for a closer relation. Obviously if one wants these things he will need more communications.

I remain slightly surprised by the people that asked me to be friend and never sent me a message. They might give to the function some extra functional meaning.

I know. It is all a game. But it is useful, funny and sometimes touching.
Again thank you.

[beppe]

Originally Posted by pshrynk

The friends function is really just for easier contacting if you want to send a private message or go to that person's page to leave a public message. No obligation is implied.

I went for a little walk and now I see your point better.

It's a function and one uses it the way he chooses.
It is not designed for the production of some predefined results. Like cut and paste or sort or search. It is a facility.

It is in character with Web 2.0. Fluid (no obligation, neat). It is just the name that has implications by its own. If they called it bi-contact it would be the same function but not with the same impact and use. For an old fashioned old country old school old culture old romantic this friend function can be surprising. Like an ebook for an ancient monk. Progress.
I will use it the way I choose. Which is a big advantage. Thanks again.

[montsnmags]

Originally Posted by beppe

...

I remain slightly surprised by the people that asked me to be friend and never sent me a message. They might give to the function some extra functional meaning.

I know. It is all a game. But it is useful, funny and sometimes touching.
Again thank you.

I befriended you because I needed someone to help me move on Tuesday. It's only a few pianos, and one, lead-lined coffin (unused - it's an investment).

Someone elsewhere calls the people he knows only on the internet (never met in real life) his "imaginary friends". I like that, and pre-internet I already had a whole lot of imaginary friends, which I could then introduce
my new imaginary friends to.

[Serious note: I think within your profile you can also add some restrictions so that only your "Friends" can see?/post? to your "Visitor Messages", or receive Private Messages from them]

For me, becoming "Friends" here is, at start, an acknowledgement of a break through of formality, on to a friendly, casual interaction likely to be repeated, to remain, and to develop.

'Course, I have very, very few friends (introvert here), so what do I know?

So, bring some gloves, beppe, on Tuesday. And maybe a removal truck. And some boxes. I'll send you the keys - call me when you're done.

Cheers,
Marc

[beppe]

Originally Posted by montsnmags

I befriended you because I needed someone to help me move on Tuesday. It's only a few pianos, and one, lead-lined coffin (unused - it's an investment).

Someone elsewhere calls the people he knows only on the internet (never met in real life) his "imaginary friends". I like that, and pre-internet I already had a whole lot of imaginary friends, which I could then introduce
my new imaginary friends to.

[Serious note: I think within your profile you can also add some restrictions so that only your "Friends" can see?/post? to your "Visitor Messages", or receive Private Messages from them]

For me, becoming "Friends" here is, at start, an acknowledgement of a break through of formality, on to a friendly, casual interaction likely to be repeated, to remain, and to develop.

'Course, I have very, very few friends (introvert here), so what do I know?

So, bring some gloves, beppe, on Tuesday. And maybe a removal truck. And some boxes. I'll send you the keys - call me when you're done.

Cheers,
Marc

Cute and ...

What is this? A giant frog behind the couch, mummified? Marc, Maaarc

[pshrynk]

Oh, that's just Jeremy. Ignore him if he gets too rude.