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Old 01-17-2009, 07:18 PM   #106
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Lilac - I had that experience whilst on and coming off of seroxat when I had a previous bad spell of depression, along with shed loads of other side effects. I'm currently on a low dose of prozac, and the only side effect I've noticed is a major decrease in appetite - which actually isn't such a bad thing, especially given that I used to comfort-eat.
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Old 01-17-2009, 08:33 PM   #107
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...
3 - Creative projects - as long as I haven't promised the results to anyone. (Otherwise it becomes another obligation.)
...
I hear that, though I tend to promise the results to myself rather than anyone else. I've too many projects and ideas that I've barely started, or not started, only to stall. That's dreadfully disappointing.

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4 - Meditation... but sometimes it's hard to focus, if I'm really stressed. I have a biofeedback program (The Journey to Wild Divine) that has helped with this a lot. That was how I discovered that creative projects help so well.
...
My Dad used meditation to aid with the stresses and depressions of his metastasised prostate cancer. I think it was of great use to him, and he seemed to end up with some kind of weird combination/mash-up of Buddhism and Catholic Anglicanism at the end. I have his meditation stool now, though I don't use it (I don't meditate).

It was only years after he died that we considered that Dad may have been dealing with depression, and that his means of dealing with it was his long-distance running, which he practised to an obsessive degree (later on in conjunction with cycling and swimming, and inevitable competition (against himself, knowing Dad) in triathlons). Mum is "mum" on such subjects mostly, and cannot be comfortably drawn on the subject.

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6 - Meds - I don't like this at all, but the anxiety attacks and depression got bad enough at one point that I had to really look at this option.
...
I avoid medications, often even in the midst of migraine (though I concede I've just taken two Panadeine for my current migraine - damned things seem to be on a roll lately). Please don't get me wrong - I'm not suggesting that medication is wrong at all, it's just that I'm distrustful and slightly ego-paranoid. I fear side-effects of all drugs, and suspicious over things that modify my brain-chemistry/mind. It is a personal (and not necessarily rational) choice - not a moral position I'm taking. I also distrust pharmaceutical companies.

Cheers,
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Old 01-17-2009, 08:39 PM   #108
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Lilac_jive, I had that problem with a different SSRI when my doctor had me try Lexapro. Awful side effects. I know exactly what you mean. I called it "the zaps." Lexapro is a fast-metabolizing SSRI. Prozac is a slow-metabolizing SSRI, which is why it's easier to start and stop (and can be used to mitigate the zaps), though it takes longer to know if it's going to help.

The one I'm now on is sertraline (a.k.a. Zoloft), which is a medium-metabolizing type. I've been on it before and stopped taking it with no side effects. I may be able to try discontinuing it this summer. (No point in trying that in the middle of the semester!)

I needed it when The Teenager was being really awful and blaming me for everything, but I think things are a lot better now, so I might be able to ditch it. I'd rather do with just meditation and creative activities.

Oh, and I've been taking melatonin regularly at bedtime to help me get drowsy and go to sleep, and it really does seem to help and doesn't make me drowsy the next day. I have to have the lights dim and be willing to try to go to sleep for it to work, but it does help.

Marc, my feelings about medications are remarkably similar to yours. I'm ok with the melatonin, because I know that's just a compound my body makes anyway. I would dearly like to get rid of everything else I'm taking (including allergy meds). As the only wage earner in a family of four, though, I started to really stress about the idea of having a severe breakdown and being unable to take care of my family, which was a bad vicious cycle to be in.

Quite a few years back, I told a doctor who asked me if I wanted a prescription that I thought it was a crutch. He agreed, but pointed out that if I had a broken leg, I'd take the crutch for as long as I needed it. At that time, I didn't need the crutch. For a little while now, I have needed it (I think), but hopefully I'm starting to be at the "mending" point.
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Old 01-17-2009, 09:16 PM   #109
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Lilac_jive, I had that problem with a different SSRI when my doctor had me try Lexapro. Awful side effects. I know exactly what you mean. I called it "the zaps." Lexapro is a fast-metabolizing SSRI. Prozac is a slow-metabolizing SSRI, which is why it's easier to start and stop (and can be used to mitigate the zaps), though it takes longer to know if it's going to help.

The one I'm now on is sertraline (a.k.a. Zoloft), which is a medium-metabolizing type. I've been on it before and stopped taking it with no side effects. I may be able to try discontinuing it this summer. (No point in trying that in the middle of the semester!)

I needed it when The Teenager was being really awful and blaming me for everything, but I think things are a lot better now, so I might be able to ditch it. I'd rather do with just meditation and creative activities.

Oh, and I've been taking melatonin regularly at bedtime to help me get drowsy and go to sleep, and it really does seem to help and doesn't make me drowsy the next day. I have to have the lights dim and be willing to try to go to sleep for it to work, but it does help.

Marc, my feelings about medications are remarkably similar to yours. I'm ok with the melatonin, because I know that's just a compound my body makes anyway. I would dearly like to get rid of everything else I'm taking (including allergy meds). As the only wage earner in a family of four, though, I started to really stress about the idea of having a severe breakdown and being unable to take care of my family, which was a bad vicious cycle to be in.

Quite a few years back, I told a doctor who asked me if I wanted a prescription that I thought it was a crutch. He agreed, but pointed out that if I had a broken leg, I'd take the crutch for as long as I needed it. At that time, I didn't need the crutch. For a little while now, I have needed it (I think), but hopefully I'm starting to be at the "mending" point.

The zaps is what I called it too! FRIGGIN AWFUL!

I'm kicking myself in the butt for going off. I thought after I left my last job I wouldn't need it anymore. But the pressure of this one is starting to get to me.
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Old 01-17-2009, 10:03 PM   #110
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If you have to try another one, ask for a medium or long-metabolism variety. Tell your doctor you had a bad reaction to fast-metabolizing versions (if you don't still have the same doctor). I think doctors are pretty much aware of this side-effect now.

Oddly enough, when I quit Lexapro, at the end I got a fever, chills, and was sure I had the flu. It was only later that I realized it had been the side effects. (The track of my illness was wrong for flu.)
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Old 01-17-2009, 10:05 PM   #111
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If you have to try another one, ask for a medium or long-metabolism variety. Tell your doctor you had a bad reaction to fast-metabolizing versions (if you don't still have the same doctor). I think doctors are pretty much aware of this side-effect now.

Oddly enough, when I quit Lexapro, at the end I got a fever, chills, and was sure I had the flu. It was only later that I realized it had been the side effects. (The track of my illness was wrong for flu.)
I thought I had a hangover, LOL. I thought it was weird, because I didn't drink that much and I never get hangovers.

Thanks for the advice
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Old 01-18-2009, 11:24 AM   #112
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Right, depression for me is just another room down the short corridor I walk all the time. I get behind on tasks, which lead to anxieties and stress, which build up until I have sleepless nights, which then lead to anger, self-disgust, and "Oh, what the hell does it all matter anyway?" depression (Yoda had it a bit wrong, in my opinion). At that point, they play off one another for weeks or months until I somehow dig myself out or reboot. The key for me is to avoid getting behind in the first place and to realize when stresses and anxieties are building and deal with them (how is still a bit of mystery for me) quickly. But if I do that, I can pretty reliably avoid all the other pains. I wish I had learned it all long ago.

By the way, comforting things like tea, chocolate, food, MobileRead (Ahem!), time alone, time with friends, music, reading, etc. do not help but make things worse for me unless they are done, of course, in moderation as brief breaks between periods of calm but efficient productivity. I have often let myself indulge in this or that diversion and before long the day is over and now I am yet another day behind with more people disappointed or pissed at me and the number and ferocity of the demons at night just increases.
Pretty good observations there VR, and you nailed most of MR regulars on the head in one post!
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Old 01-18-2009, 11:39 AM   #113
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VR, you and I are twin souls.
We are, aren't we? Okay, less metaphysical now.

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3 - Creative projects - as long as I haven't promised the results to anyone. (Otherwise it becomes another obligation.)
Yes, I agree completely, neko. In particular, I have found that drawing is particularly satisfying and stress-relieving for me so long as I am engaged at it (that is, I push myself to get into the drawing and try to excel at it) and, like you, no one is expecting anything from me out of it (or even will ever see it).

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4 - Meditation... but sometimes it's hard to focus, if I'm really stressed. I have a biofeedback program (The Journey to Wild Divine) that has helped with this a lot. That was how I discovered that creative projects help so well.
I may be very interested in this program so long as I'm convinced it's not a rip-off or some trivial game. I'm not saying it is, I'm just pretty skeptical of commercial products of any kind.

For me, I seem unable to meditate while at work even for very short periods. Instead, I have taken to look for live streaming videos (webcams) of nature (if I can't just get up and walk outside). I don't want to hear people or music or see morphing screen shots. I just want to watch a continuously updating view of some place beautiful as I listen to the natural sounds of the setting. I have found only a few so far and am always looking for more with higher resolution, better sound, and faster streaming. Here's an example (click near the bottom to turn the sound on and then right click on the video and select Zoom and Full Screen - it's not quite awful): http://www.mbayaq.org/efc/efc_mbay/mbay_cam.asp?bhcp=1

If I watch something like this for a few minutes, I can feel the tension release in my muscles and I'm a bit more calm. But then (and this is the important part), after about ten minutes, I need Jimminy Cricket to whisper (or yell) in my ear that it's time to go back to work and be productive again for awhile.
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Old 01-18-2009, 11:40 AM   #114
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When I tried Neko's link - the program was not there....
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Old 01-18-2009, 01:06 PM   #115
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Neko- watch out for those SSRIs. I was on a spinoff of Effexor, and coming off that drug was almost worse than depression. I got these things called brain shivers, it was like someone was electrocuting me all day long. Luckily my doctor got me low dose Prozac to ween me off and that did the trick.
Brain shivers. I like that! I've been calling them head spins, but that's a much better description. the main problem with developing the withdrawal state is that physicians discontinue it too fast. You should have at least a month in tapering on higher doses of the NSRI's.

$300, please, I only take cash these days...
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Old 01-18-2009, 01:07 PM   #116
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I'm not sure what was wrong with the link above, but try this: http://www.wilddivine.com or go directly to the game description: http://www.wilddivine.com/servlet/-s...to-Wild/Detail

Don't buy that version, though, because it doesn't have the hardware you need to play the game. They're apparently out of hardware until next month. In any case, you may be able to pick the game up for less on ebay or elsewhere.

It's not a gimmick and works well. It's expensive compared to typical video games -- about three times the cost, including the hardware-- and the game play time is probably 10-15 hours from start to finish, but I still use the activities, which can be accessed on an individual basis, and I've had the game for about 5 years. I have the sequel as well.

What it does is frame a series of mental exercises, most of which are supported by the biofeedback hardware, in the context of an environment you can walk around in, with a simple plot. The environment itself is beautiful. The background scenery is probably inspired by the area around Boulder, CO (where the designers live), but the architecture is a mix of mostly Eastern Asian styles. Video of teachers for the different activities is very nicely blended into the environment. The music is also very restful (for the most part-- there were a couple of pieces I didn't care for). The activities tend to consist of four types. Two types use a skin conductivity measure and teach you to lower or raise your level of "arousal" (not a term used in the game). Lowering arousal calms you. Raising it psyches you up and makes you more alert. It's helpful to be able to have some control over this, and I found the exercises very helpful in this regard. The feedback, again, helped me to understand more clearly what thoughts stress me out and what thoughts help me keep my balance.

The third type of activity is a breathing exercise designed to smooth out heart rate variability. There's a fair amount of research in this area that I'm not qualified to evaluate, but from my own experience, this breathing technique has helped me with migraines and (oddly enough) menstrual cramps, as well as general stress. I have heard from others who felt it helped them with hyperactivity as well.

The fourth type of activity consists of guided mental exercises. Most of these were pretty good, and I found them helpful.

I don't really play video games much, but I remember, right before I discovered this game, telling someone I wished I could find a video game that would be about saving the world in some kind of non-violent manner. This game comes the closest to that idea of any I've ever seen. It's probably not for everyone, but I think it's worth checking out if you have problems with stress.

I have an affiliate link with WildDivine, which I'm happy to PM to anyone who's interested. However, as noted above, it seems that they're out of the hardware at the moment, and you probably can get the product less expensively by buying it elsewhere.
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Old 01-18-2009, 01:22 PM   #117
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Brain shivers. I like that! I've been calling them head spins, but that's a much better description. the main problem with developing the withdrawal state is that physicians discontinue it too fast. You should have at least a month in tapering on higher doses of the NSRI's.

$300, please, I only take cash these days...

That's the kind of technically term. I prefer "zaps."
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Old 01-18-2009, 02:02 PM   #118
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the main problem with developing the withdrawal state is that physicians discontinue it too fast. You should have at least a month in tapering on higher doses of the NSRI's.
I was on an extremely low dose of Lexapro when I stopped (half the usual starting dose, if I recall correctly), and I'd never been on a very high dose, and I still got the zaps. I think some people are more sensitive to this problem than others.

My brother got the zaps just from taking Paxil (another fast-metabolizing SSRI). But the Muffin Man takes Paxil with no problems.
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Old 01-18-2009, 04:08 PM   #119
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Funny to say but the work that brings me stress is also the source of its treatment. I just sink into the manual labor part of it to relax, in a physically demanding way, but soothing to the spirit.

I did my last contract for my business yesterday and will concentrate on the cabinet maker job I've had for the last year. But I still have to clear that debt my company contracted. When that's over an other stress will be gone.
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Old 01-19-2009, 10:52 AM   #120
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