Silliness Add/Read a good joke to lighten your day - Page 684

drjd · 10-02-2018, 05:22 AM

Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.

drjd · 10-03-2018, 05:15 AM

Just changed my Facebook name to 'No one' so when I see stupid posts I can click like and it will say 'No one likes this'.

drjd · 10-04-2018, 06:27 AM

An usurer takes lots of interest in his work.

Fbone · 10-04-2018, 09:19 PM

My boss asked me to start the presentation with a joke. I attached payslips on the first slide.

Fbone · 10-05-2018, 04:10 PM

They say you are what you eat. I don’t remember eating a huge disappointment.

drjd · 10-06-2018, 05:17 AM

We live in an expanding universe. All of it is trying to get away from Chuck Norris.

drjd · 10-07-2018, 05:37 AM

A young mother finds out she is pregnant again, and she tells the good news to anyone who will listen. One day when the woman and the boy are out shopping, a friend of the mother asks the little boy if he was excited about the new baby.

"Oh, yes!" the little tyke says. And having overheard some of his parents' private conversations, he adds, "And I know what we are going to name it, too. If it's a girl we're going to call it Mary, and if it's another boy we're going to call it Quits."

Fbone · 10-07-2018, 11:13 AM

I would love to lose weight but I hate losing.

Adoby · 10-07-2018, 05:51 PM

I did a search for "bic lighter" and I got around 6.5 million matches.

Fbone · 10-07-2018, 08:54 PM

There are some that are wise, and others are otherwise.

Darqref · 10-08-2018, 12:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fbone

There are some that are wise, and others are otherwise.

Wise and Otherwise is actually a very interesting game.... Kinda like Apples to Apples for old folk sayings.

drjd · 10-08-2018, 04:47 AM

Ann Arbor: The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a Burger King in Ypsilanti, Michigan at 12:50am, flashed a gun and demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't open the cash register without a food order. When the man ordered onion rings, the clerk said they weren't available for breakfast. The man, frustrated, walked away.

Fbone · 10-09-2018, 10:14 PM

I meant to behave but there were too many other options.

Adoby · 10-10-2018, 04:58 AM

Never put off till tomorrow, what you can do the day after tomorrow.

drjd · 10-10-2018, 05:47 AM

Farmers engaged in paddy cultivation for generations are genetically ingrained!

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10-02-2018, 05:22 AM	#10246
drjd The Couch Potato Posts: 34,509 Karma: 230999999 Join Date: Aug 2015 Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta	Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.

10-03-2018, 05:15 AM	#10247
drjd The Couch Potato Posts: 34,509 Karma: 230999999 Join Date: Aug 2015 Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta	Just changed my Facebook name to 'No one' so when I see stupid posts I can click like and it will say 'No one likes this'.

10-04-2018, 06:27 AM	#10248
drjd The Couch Potato Posts: 34,509 Karma: 230999999 Join Date: Aug 2015 Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta	An usurer takes lots of interest in his work.

10-04-2018, 09:19 PM	#10249
Fbone Is that a sandwich? Posts: 8,299 Karma: 101697116 Join Date: Jun 2010 Device: Nook Glowlight Plus	My boss asked me to start the presentation with a joke. I attached payslips on the first slide.

10-05-2018, 04:10 PM	#10250
Fbone Is that a sandwich? Posts: 8,299 Karma: 101697116 Join Date: Jun 2010 Device: Nook Glowlight Plus	They say you are what you eat. I don’t remember eating a huge disappointment.

10-06-2018, 05:17 AM	#10251
drjd The Couch Potato Posts: 34,509 Karma: 230999999 Join Date: Aug 2015 Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta	We live in an expanding universe. All of it is trying to get away from Chuck Norris.

10-07-2018, 05:37 AM	#10252
drjd The Couch Potato Posts: 34,509 Karma: 230999999 Join Date: Aug 2015 Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta	A young mother finds out she is pregnant again, and she tells the good news to anyone who will listen. One day when the woman and the boy are out shopping, a friend of the mother asks the little boy if he was excited about the new baby. "Oh, yes!" the little tyke says. And having overheard some of his parents' private conversations, he adds, "And I know what we are going to name it, too. If it's a girl we're going to call it Mary, and if it's another boy we're going to call it Quits."

10-07-2018, 11:13 AM	#10253
Fbone Is that a sandwich? Posts: 8,299 Karma: 101697116 Join Date: Jun 2010 Device: Nook Glowlight Plus	I would love to lose weight but I hate losing.

10-07-2018, 05:51 PM	#10254
Adoby Handy Elephant Posts: 1,737 Karma: 26785684 Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Southern Sweden, far out in the quiet woods Device: Samsung Galaxy Tab S8 Ultra	I did a search for "bic lighter" and I got around 6.5 million matches.

10-07-2018, 08:54 PM	#10255
Fbone Is that a sandwich? Posts: 8,299 Karma: 101697116 Join Date: Jun 2010 Device: Nook Glowlight Plus	There are some that are wise, and others are otherwise.

10-08-2018, 04:47 AM	#10257
drjd The Couch Potato Posts: 34,509 Karma: 230999999 Join Date: Aug 2015 Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta	Ann Arbor: The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a Burger King in Ypsilanti, Michigan at 12:50am, flashed a gun and demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't open the cash register without a food order. When the man ordered onion rings, the clerk said they weren't available for breakfast. The man, frustrated, walked away.

10-09-2018, 10:14 PM	#10258
Fbone Is that a sandwich? Posts: 8,299 Karma: 101697116 Join Date: Jun 2010 Device: Nook Glowlight Plus	I meant to behave but there were too many other options.

10-10-2018, 04:58 AM	#10259
Adoby Handy Elephant Posts: 1,737 Karma: 26785684 Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Southern Sweden, far out in the quiet woods Device: Samsung Galaxy Tab S8 Ultra	Never put off till tomorrow, what you can do the day after tomorrow.

10-10-2018, 05:47 AM	#10260
drjd The Couch Potato Posts: 34,509 Karma: 230999999 Join Date: Aug 2015 Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta	Farmers engaged in paddy cultivation for generations are genetically ingrained!