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#9661 |
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The Couch Potato
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 34,509
Karma: 230999999
Join Date: Aug 2015
Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta
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When I got the bill for the engine rebuild, I blew a gasket!
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#9662 |
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Is that a sandwich?
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 8,320
Karma: 103930826
Join Date: Jun 2010
Device: Nook Glowlight Plus
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I dig,
you dig, we dig, he dig, she dig, they dig. It's not a beautiful poem but it's very deep. |
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#9663 |
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Is that a sandwich?
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 8,320
Karma: 103930826
Join Date: Jun 2010
Device: Nook Glowlight Plus
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When I found out that my microwave wasn't waterproof, I was shocked.
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#9664 |
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The Couch Potato
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 34,509
Karma: 230999999
Join Date: Aug 2015
Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta
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My wife kept insisting I do macrame. Finally I shouted, 'Knot again!'
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#9665 |
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The Couch Potato
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 34,509
Karma: 230999999
Join Date: Aug 2015
Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta
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It was cold in the bedroom so I laid down next to the wood-stove and slept like a log.
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#9666 |
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Is that a sandwich?
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 8,320
Karma: 103930826
Join Date: Jun 2010
Device: Nook Glowlight Plus
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Getting paid to sleep would be a dream job.
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#9667 |
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Surfin the alpha waves ~~
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 26,827
Karma: 459765791
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: New Jersey
Device: Jetbook Lite & Mini, Nook STR, Kobo, Hanvon N516, Kindle 2, Androids
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Is that you, Li'l Abner?
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#9668 |
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The Couch Potato
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 34,509
Karma: 230999999
Join Date: Aug 2015
Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta
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Why do some people hate puns? Because they are laughtose intolerant!
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#9669 |
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Is that a sandwich?
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 8,320
Karma: 103930826
Join Date: Jun 2010
Device: Nook Glowlight Plus
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I think I want a job cleaning mirrors. It's just something I can see myself doing!
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#9670 |
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The Couch Potato
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 34,509
Karma: 230999999
Join Date: Aug 2015
Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta
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None of my tweets go viral. It's like that '80s movie, The Never-Trending Story.
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#9671 |
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The Couch Potato
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 34,509
Karma: 230999999
Join Date: Aug 2015
Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta
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I didn't realize how bad of a driver I was until my navigation system said:
"IN 400 FEET, DO A SLIGHT RIGHT, STOP, AND LET ME OUT." |
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#9672 |
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Is that a sandwich?
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 8,320
Karma: 103930826
Join Date: Jun 2010
Device: Nook Glowlight Plus
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If you ever feel cold just stand in a corner. They are usually around 90 degrees!
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#9673 |
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Is that a sandwich?
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 8,320
Karma: 103930826
Join Date: Jun 2010
Device: Nook Glowlight Plus
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Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.
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#9674 |
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The Couch Potato
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 34,509
Karma: 230999999
Join Date: Aug 2015
Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta
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A man entered the bus with both of his front pants pockets full of golf balls, and sat down next to a beautiful (you guessed it) blonde.
The puzzled blonde kept looking at him and his bulging pockets. Finally, after many such glances from her, he said, "It's golf balls". Nevertheless, the blonde continued to look at him thoughtfully and finally, not being able to contain her curiosity any longer, asked."Does it hurt as much as tennis elbow?" |
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#9675 |
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Illiterate
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 10,279
Karma: 37848716
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: The Sandwich Isles
Device: Samsung Galaxy S10+, Microsoft Surface Pro
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![]() The new robot postie has arrived. I wonder what it meant by "exterminate ... exterminate |
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