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Old 06-22-2010, 12:47 AM   #46
SameOldStory
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If I were to ever become gay...none of you broken down old men are going to have a chance with me.

Even if gay I would have standards.
Well I gots standards too. I'm not about to move out of this trailer park.

.
..
...

What kind of beer you got?
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Old 06-22-2010, 12:52 AM   #47
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Your post says "No, no, no!"

But your avatar says "Yes, yes, yes!"

Look at that purty mouth, SameOldStory!

Make him squeal!
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Old 06-22-2010, 01:46 AM   #48
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so, you guys hear about that new condom? the one with teeth?
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Old 06-22-2010, 01:58 AM   #49
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Bah, humbug!
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so, you guys hear about that new condom? the one with teeth?
Ouch! That's a bad kitty!

How to show you got class:

Spoiler:
This reminds me, fellas--if you want to impress the ladies, show 'em you're a gentleman and don't leave used condoms in the ash trays. Always rinse 'em out as soon as you finish so they'll be ready to go next time.
Last edited by WT Sharpe; 06-22-2010 at 02:07 AM.
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Old 06-22-2010, 02:23 AM   #50
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I'm gonna marry that woman!
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Old 06-22-2010, 02:31 AM   #51
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Aren't you around 30 years older than her?
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Old 06-22-2010, 03:06 AM   #52
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She's 16?
Cool!

Aren't you supposed to be on a beer run?
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Old 06-22-2010, 12:29 PM   #53
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She's 16?
Cool!

Aren't you supposed to be on a beer run?
my kids would sure be surprised!
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Old 06-23-2010, 12:12 AM   #54
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I tried a condom once. They sure are lousy balloons. But not too bad if you fill them up with water.

My wife tried one of my beers. Now she wants me to try some Boone's Farm Strawberry wine.

But my cousins run me down too much. Any ideas before she gets home from working?
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Old 06-23-2010, 01:28 AM   #55
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Originally Posted by SameOldStory View Post
I tried a condom once. They sure are lousy balloons. But not too bad if you fill them up with water.

My wife tried one of my beers. Now she wants me to try some Boone's Farm Strawberry wine.

But my cousins run me down too much. Any ideas before she gets home from working?

Show her a picture of a derelict drinkin' Thunderbird. and tell her "You're too good to end up like that..."
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Old 06-23-2010, 06:52 AM   #56
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Meth, it's what's for dinner.
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Old 06-23-2010, 10:49 PM   #57
SameOldStory
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Show her a picture of a derelict drinkin' Thunderbird. and tell her "You're too good to end up like that..."
She knows what her daddy looks like already. They used to share the bottle when she was just a little girl. Now she has to buy her own bottles. At least it’s cheaper by the gallon.

He lives here. That is when it's warm. In the winter he goes into the big city. Makes damn good money on the street corners. I'm tempted to go with him but it sounds like a lot of work. And he says I gotta loose weight ‘cause no one is gonna give money to someone as fat as me. Damn SOBs.



If she stops drinkin Thunderbird, she might start drinkin Boone's Farm Strawberry wine all the time. Then I'll be too bussy for my sisters and cousins.

Knew I shouldn't have given her some of my beer.

Says the bubbles make her romantic.


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Meth, it's what's for dinner.
Don't know nuthin, a meth is what she has to clean up after dinner. Well, sooner or later any how.
Last edited by SameOldStory; 06-23-2010 at 10:51 PM.
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Old 06-24-2010, 01:46 PM   #58
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FUBAR!
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I wouldn't have touched those girls even in my teenage years! I bet even their crabs have herpes!
At this point in my life, my standards are incredibly low...

Standard #1: Is she breathing?
Standard #2: See Standard #1.
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Old 06-24-2010, 02:00 PM   #59
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At this point in my life, my standards are incredibly low...

Standard #1: Is she breathing?
Standard #2: See Standard #1.
oh my! reminds me of soldiers back before combined basic training (except for the combat arms)
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Old 06-24-2010, 02:47 PM   #60
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Beepbeep n beebeep, yeah!
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Is it just me, or is SOS deteriorating as this thread progresses?
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