Silliness Terrible Jokes - Page 38

ownedbycats · 03-19-2025, 07:38 AM

I bought a thesaurus, only to find its pages were blank.

I can't find the words to describe how angry I am.

DNSB · 03-19-2025, 03:04 PM

A dictionary, an encyclopedia, and a thesaurus walk into a bar. The mixologist takes one look at them and quips, “What is this—a jest, mockery, target practice, repartee, facetiousness, drollery, banter, or a knee-slapper?”

Comfy.n · 03-26-2025, 07:35 PM

A man is lying asleep in bed with his wife one night when she wakes
him, saying, “Close the window; it’s cold outside.”
He grunts, rolls over, and goes back to sleep.
His wife nudges him. “Close the window; it’s cold outside.”
He moans, pulls the blankets closer, and goes back to sleep.
Now his wife kicks him firmly and pushes him with both hands.
“Go on. Close the window; it’s cold outside.”
Grumbling, he slides out of bed, shuffles to the window, and bangs
down the open lower half. Glaring at his wife he says, “So now it’s
warm outside?”

DNSB · 03-26-2025, 08:02 PM

What comic book dealt with the horrors of digital currency?

Spoiler:

DNSB · 03-28-2025, 11:36 PM

What do you call a cult that is hard to get into?

Difficult

ownedbycats · 03-30-2025, 08:53 AM

I can’t remember how to write 1, 1000, 51, 6, and 500 in Roman numerals.

IM LIVID.

ownedbycats · 03-30-2025, 04:22 PM

Click image for larger version

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DNSB · 03-30-2025, 10:43 PM

Teacher: What is the most common phrase used in school?

Student: I don’t know!

Teacher: Correct!

DNSB · 04-01-2025, 02:44 PM

Another visual joke:

Cactus Chef · 04-04-2025, 09:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DNSB

Type whatever you want in here...

This one got a chuckle out of my mother, who's currently navigating a stage 4 cancer diagnosis. So, thank-you for that.

ownedbycats · 04-04-2025, 03:42 PM

With the price of the Nintendo's newly announced console, it's time to Switch 2 a cheaper hobby.

Martinoptic · 04-12-2025, 11:55 AM

What do you call an alligator detective, dressed in a vest?

Spoiler:

ownedbycats · 04-26-2025, 10:20 PM

ownedbycats · 05-02-2025, 02:30 PM

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DNSB · 05-02-2025, 06:25 PM

I inject heroin into my arm that's scarred from times prior. My eyes roll back into my head as my manager pounds on my doo telling me I'm on in five minutes. Let's Rock! I say as I grab my bass guitar, take a pull of cheap whisky, and get into my Chuck E. Cheese Munch's Make Believe Band costume.

03-26-2025, 08:02 PM	#559
DNSB Bibliophagist Posts: 46,590 Karma: 169712392 Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Vancouver Device: Kobo Sage, Libra Colour, Lenovo M8 FHD, Paperwhite 4, Tolino epos	What comic book dealt with the horrors of digital currency? Spoiler: Tales from the Crypto.

04-01-2025, 02:44 PM	#564
DNSB Bibliophagist Posts: 46,590 Karma: 169712392 Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Vancouver Device: Kobo Sage, Libra Colour, Lenovo M8 FHD, Paperwhite 4, Tolino epos	Another visual joke: Attached Thumbnails

04-12-2025, 11:55 AM	#567
Martinoptic Bibliophist Posts: 7,137 Karma: 7173892 Join Date: Dec 2021 Location: England Device: none	What do you call an alligator detective, dressed in a vest? Spoiler: An invesigator!

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03-19-2025, 07:38 AM	#556
ownedbycats Custom User Title Posts: 11,039 Karma: 75555555 Join Date: Oct 2018 Location: Canada Device: Kobo Libra H2O, formerly Aura HD	I bought a thesaurus, only to find its pages were blank. I can't find the words to describe how angry I am.

03-19-2025, 03:04 PM	#557
DNSB Bibliophagist Posts: 46,590 Karma: 169712392 Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Vancouver Device: Kobo Sage, Libra Colour, Lenovo M8 FHD, Paperwhite 4, Tolino epos	A dictionary, an encyclopedia, and a thesaurus walk into a bar. The mixologist takes one look at them and quips, “What is this—a jest, mockery, target practice, repartee, facetiousness, drollery, banter, or a knee-slapper?”

03-26-2025, 07:35 PM	#558
Comfy.n want to learn what I want Posts: 1,615 Karma: 7891011 Join Date: Sep 2020 Device: none	A man is lying asleep in bed with his wife one night when she wakes him, saying, “Close the window; it’s cold outside.” He grunts, rolls over, and goes back to sleep. His wife nudges him. “Close the window; it’s cold outside.” He moans, pulls the blankets closer, and goes back to sleep. Now his wife kicks him firmly and pushes him with both hands. “Go on. Close the window; it’s cold outside.” Grumbling, he slides out of bed, shuffles to the window, and bangs down the open lower half. Glaring at his wife he says, “So now it’s warm outside?”

03-28-2025, 11:36 PM	#560
DNSB Bibliophagist Posts: 46,590 Karma: 169712392 Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Vancouver Device: Kobo Sage, Libra Colour, Lenovo M8 FHD, Paperwhite 4, Tolino epos	What do you call a cult that is hard to get into? Difficult

03-30-2025, 08:53 AM	#561
ownedbycats Custom User Title Posts: 11,039 Karma: 75555555 Join Date: Oct 2018 Location: Canada Device: Kobo Libra H2O, formerly Aura HD	I can’t remember how to write 1, 1000, 51, 6, and 500 in Roman numerals. IM LIVID.

03-30-2025, 04:22 PM	#562
ownedbycats Custom User Title Posts: 11,039 Karma: 75555555 Join Date: Oct 2018 Location: Canada Device: Kobo Libra H2O, formerly Aura HD

03-30-2025, 10:43 PM	#563
DNSB Bibliophagist Posts: 46,590 Karma: 169712392 Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Vancouver Device: Kobo Sage, Libra Colour, Lenovo M8 FHD, Paperwhite 4, Tolino epos	Teacher: What is the most common phrase used in school? Student: I don’t know! Teacher: Correct!

04-04-2025, 03:42 PM	#566
ownedbycats Custom User Title Posts: 11,039 Karma: 75555555 Join Date: Oct 2018 Location: Canada Device: Kobo Libra H2O, formerly Aura HD	With the price of the Nintendo's newly announced console, it's time to Switch 2 a cheaper hobby.

04-26-2025, 10:20 PM	#568
ownedbycats Custom User Title Posts: 11,039 Karma: 75555555 Join Date: Oct 2018 Location: Canada Device: Kobo Libra H2O, formerly Aura HD

05-02-2025, 02:30 PM	#569
ownedbycats Custom User Title Posts: 11,039 Karma: 75555555 Join Date: Oct 2018 Location: Canada Device: Kobo Libra H2O, formerly Aura HD

Advert

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05-02-2025, 06:25 PM	#570
DNSB Bibliophagist Posts: 46,590 Karma: 169712392 Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Vancouver Device: Kobo Sage, Libra Colour, Lenovo M8 FHD, Paperwhite 4, Tolino epos	I inject heroin into my arm that's scarred from times prior. My eyes roll back into my head as my manager pounds on my doo telling me I'm on in five minutes. Let's Rock! I say as I grab my bass guitar, take a pull of cheap whisky, and get into my Chuck E. Cheese Munch's Make Believe Band costume.