"The Shameless Promotion and Endless Plug-Your-Novel Thread" - Page 32

MaMiller · 05-30-2010, 03:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by davidhburton

Another one soils himself shamefully....YES!!

I don't wish to soil myself, but could I shamefully promote my revamped website?? If you saw my old one (written with software obtained from the Dollar Store), this is a step in the right direction. If you get a chance, stop by and let me know what you think. www.maureenamiller.com

neilmarr · 05-30-2010, 04:05 PM

Very neat and easily navigated, Ma ... and what a lovely smile! Good luck. Neil

Shayne Parkinson · 05-30-2010, 06:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by alvico

Thanks, WA and Maureen!

I'm beside myself with excitement.

I uploaded Thin Blood to Amazon at the beginning of this month and it's gone from being ranked in the tens of thousands to currently #17 in the Kindle store (fiction and non-fiction). I can't explain why, how or what, but I'm certainly not complaining.

Wow, Vicki, congratulations! That's wonderful!

GraceKrispy · 05-30-2010, 09:30 PM

Great job, Vicki! I just went to get your book from smashwords, and I realized I have already downloaded it! I am pushing it up my queue quite a bit- the reviews are fantastic!

Roger Parkinson · 05-30-2010, 10:20 PM

Somewhere that I can talk about my books? Well, how can I resist?

There are three of them, all on smashwords

Where Sheep May Safely Graze (free)

"The cat stared up at him as though it knew all about the entry and he was being tiresome about it. Then it proceeded to have a bath, the kind of cello-playing bath one feels obliged to look away from unless one knows the cat well."

A collection of short (some very short) stories and poems, mostly about New Zealand, or cats, or sheep.

Summon Your Dragons (free)

Is Azkun an ancient hero returned to save them all or just a madman with absurd ideas about dragons? The King of Anthor has no time for ancient heroes and even less time for dragons. Old crimes are coming back to haunt him and old enemies are stirring on his borders. His last hopes may lie with Azkun, whoever he is.

There are almost no dragons in this book, in spite of the title. But what people think about them is all important. And there is a mystery at the heart of it which my poor characters never do figure out (but you do).

The White Fox ($1.99)

Follows on from Summon Your Dragons (eight years later).

There's a special bond between a mother and daughter, something Olcish, a teenage boy, knows little about. When an old man dies at the infirmary and THEN keeps nagging him to rescue a girl from something he has to learn more about girls than he ever wanted to know. And when he does manage a dangerous rescue the old man tells him that was only practice. There's something much worse he has to do.

Some adult content (you cannot write about a teenage boy without some adult content, teenage boys mostly think about one thing).

alvico · 05-31-2010, 03:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pdurrant

Probably from obsessively checking Amazon rankings.

I'm just a bystander and I find myself checking your book when I'm at the computer.

Currently No. 11 in Books/Mysteries and Thrillers. (Just above Charlaine Harris's "Dead in the Family"!)

Who me?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shayne Parkinson

Wow, Vicki, congratulations! That's wonderful!

Thanks, Shayne! Feeling a bit Alice-in-Wonderlandy at the moment.

Still nowhere near your 10,000 downloads, though.

Quote:

Originally Posted by GraceKrispy

Great job, Vicki! I just went to get your book from smashwords, and I realized I have already downloaded it! I am pushing it up my queue quite a bit- the reviews are fantastic!

Thanks, Grace. I hope you enjoy it.

alvico · 05-31-2010, 03:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MaMiller

I don't wish to soil myself, but could I shamefully promote my revamped website?? If you saw my old one (written with software obtained from the Dollar Store), this is a step in the right direction. If you get a chance, stop by and let me know what you think. www.maureenamiller.com

Maureen, it's a fabulous site. Design, colours, navigation... everything.

Dr. Drib · 05-31-2010, 09:45 AM

I’m surprised at all the good recommendations being menioned here. Hasn’t anyone written a real stinker? Are you afraid to tell the rest of the world what the rest of the world already knows? Well, if that’s the case, let me help you out. You can use the one below as a template:

“Hiram Homer, a local poultry farmer and Indy author, was discovered dead today by a rooting hog grunting and sniffing around the remains of the corpse. Two opened TV Dinners were found near the body, their contents completely cleaned out and the tinfoil in rumpled condition, leading one investigator to conclude that Homer never had a chance to complete his dinner. The author, who writes about his own UFO kidnappings, had just completed his longest piece of writing, more than 97 pages long.

Local friend and Indy publisher, T. Lobsong Rump, called this one ‘a real stinker,’ noting that the hog had been quite busy around the body. "Apparently,” Rump continued, “Homer believed his corporeal body would soon be taken by aliens to Rigel 8., where they would provide him with an 8-track tape recorder so that he could continue to write about his adventures. Homer was never up on technology,” Rump explained apologetically, settling his extensive posterior into an over-sized Morris chair. “Perhaps the aliens have yet to be notified of Homer’s passing.”

Rump went on to explain that he would personally contact the aliens as soon as he obtained a new vacuum tube from Russia, one he needed to power his Time Travel apparatus.

“We were planning on going to Rigel 8 together. The Rigellian females are quite captivating," Rump said. "I’m sure he’s there right now, awaiting my arrival."

"I will be publishing more of this writer's incendiary prose in the future, perhaps in 2012, or until I get my Time Travel machine perfected."

You see how that was done?

Let me know if I can be of further assistance.

Remember, without Indy authors, we would have very few free ebooks.

"I Saw The Light," by Hiram Homer.

Don
(Moderator)

neilmarr · 05-31-2010, 01:43 PM

*** Hasn’t anyone written a real stinker?***

Sure, Don. Thing with real stinkers, though, is that you suss them out in a page or so and toss them aside. This doesn't provide much review material. Apart from the famous *NO!* there's nowt to report. I only ever review books I read ... which means I stuck with them to the very last word ... which means I have more positive things to say than negative, which means that my wee reviews tend to lean toward encouragement for author and potential reader, which means I win friends, influence people and pick up air hostesses. Hoots. Neil

PS: I was, of course, jesting about the air hostesses. N

JamesACooke · 05-31-2010, 09:48 PM

Looking for something funny to read - then check out the novel "Rent A Family."

Leo Zepka is stuck in a nursing home, so he hires two actors to portray the children who never visit him. With the actors' help, Leo escapes from the home and flees to Florida -- only to have his children go after him in this poignant comic work of fiction.

pdurrant · 06-01-2010, 03:53 AM

Hi James,

As I said before, you're not doing this shameless promotion right - you really should include a link to the book and perhaps pricing details (especially if you've changed the price). e.g.

Rent A Family — a humorous novel by James Aaron Cooke. For a limited period, only $1.59 at the Amazon Kindle store!

but do take another look at the formatting.

Quote:

Originally Posted by JamesACooke

Looking for something funny to read - then check out the novel "Rent A Family."

Leo Zepka is stuck in a nursing home, so he hires two actors to portray the children who never visit him. With the actors' help, Leo escapes from the home and flees to Florida -- only to have his children go after him in this poignant comic work of fiction.

Dr. Drib · 06-01-2010, 06:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MaMiller

I don't wish to soil myself, but could I shamefully promote my revamped website?? If you saw my old one (written with software obtained from the Dollar Store), this is a step in the right direction. If you get a chance, stop by and let me know what you think. www.maureenamiller.com

SOIL AWAY! Just remember to change your pampers.

(I have it on good advice that many Authors here have a large set hidden away in the closet for just such purposes.)

Don
(Moderator)

nomesque · 06-01-2010, 07:50 AM

LOOK!!!

From the Queen of Shocking the Bible Belt Senseless comes yet another stunning ebook destined for mixed reviews by the bucketload!!!

Maisy May is a story about growing up a Christian, and doing a really, really bad job of it.

Sex. Rock n roll. Gay coffee-drinking. Guitars in church. This book has it ALL. And this is only Part 1!!

Only $1.99 - cheaper than a cup of coffee, gay or otherwise.

Kevin2960 · 06-01-2010, 08:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nomesque

LOOK!!!

From the Queen of Shocking the Bible Belt Senseless comes yet another stunning ebook destined for mixed reviews by the bucketload!!!

Maisy May is a story about growing up a Christian, and doing a really, really bad job of it.

Sex. Rock n roll. Gay coffee-drinking. Guitars in church. This book has it ALL. And this is only Part 1!!

Only $1.99 - cheaper than a cup of coffee, gay or otherwise.

Yeah and a Cracking Read it is Too, With LOTS more parts to come

nomesque · 06-01-2010, 07:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kevin2960

Yeah and a Cracking Read it is Too, With LOTS more parts to come

Kevin has plans up to Maisy May 6, so far

05-30-2010, 10:20 PM	#470
Roger Parkinson Zealot Posts: 143 Karma: 108036 Join Date: May 2010 Location: Auckland, New Zealand Device: Samsung Galaxy S	Three books Somewhere that I can talk about my books? Well, how can I resist? There are three of them, all on smashwords Where Sheep May Safely Graze (free) "The cat stared up at him as though it knew all about the entry and he was being tiresome about it. Then it proceeded to have a bath, the kind of cello-playing bath one feels obliged to look away from unless one knows the cat well." A collection of short (some very short) stories and poems, mostly about New Zealand, or cats, or sheep. Summon Your Dragons (free) Is Azkun an ancient hero returned to save them all or just a madman with absurd ideas about dragons? The King of Anthor has no time for ancient heroes and even less time for dragons. Old crimes are coming back to haunt him and old enemies are stirring on his borders. His last hopes may lie with Azkun, whoever he is. There are almost no dragons in this book, in spite of the title. But what people think about them is all important. And there is a mystery at the heart of it which my poor characters never do figure out (but you do). The White Fox ($1.99) Follows on from Summon Your Dragons (eight years later). There's a special bond between a mother and daughter, something Olcish, a teenage boy, knows little about. When an old man dies at the infirmary and THEN keeps nagging him to rescue a girl from something he has to learn more about girls than he ever wanted to know. And when he does manage a dangerous rescue the old man tells him that was only practice. There's something much worse he has to do. Some adult content (you cannot write about a teenage boy without some adult content, teenage boys mostly think about one thing).

05-31-2010, 09:45 AM	#473
Dr. Drib Grand Sorcerer Posts: 45,467 Karma: 60119087 Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Peru Device: KINDLE: Oasis 3, Scribe (1st), Matcha; KOBO: Libra 2, Libra Colour	New Work By Homer To Be Published! I’m surprised at all the good recommendations being menioned here. Hasn’t anyone written a real stinker? Are you afraid to tell the rest of the world what the rest of the world already knows? Well, if that’s the case, let me help you out. You can use the one below as a template: “Hiram Homer, a local poultry farmer and Indy author, was discovered dead today by a rooting hog grunting and sniffing around the remains of the corpse. Two opened TV Dinners were found near the body, their contents completely cleaned out and the tinfoil in rumpled condition, leading one investigator to conclude that Homer never had a chance to complete his dinner. The author, who writes about his own UFO kidnappings, had just completed his longest piece of writing, more than 97 pages long. Local friend and Indy publisher, T. Lobsong Rump, called this one ‘a real stinker,’ noting that the hog had been quite busy around the body. "Apparently,” Rump continued, “Homer believed his corporeal body would soon be taken by aliens to Rigel 8., where they would provide him with an 8-track tape recorder so that he could continue to write about his adventures. Homer was never up on technology,” Rump explained apologetically, settling his extensive posterior into an over-sized Morris chair. “Perhaps the aliens have yet to be notified of Homer’s passing.” Rump went on to explain that he would personally contact the aliens as soon as he obtained a new vacuum tube from Russia, one he needed to power his Time Travel apparatus. “We were planning on going to Rigel 8 together. The Rigellian females are quite captivating," Rump said. "I’m sure he’s there right now, awaiting my arrival." "I will be publishing more of this writer's incendiary prose in the future, perhaps in 2012, or until I get my Time Travel machine perfected." You see how that was done? Let me know if I can be of further assistance. Remember, without Indy authors, we would have very few free ebooks. "I Saw The Light," by Hiram Homer. Don (Moderator) Last edited by Dr. Drib; 05-31-2010 at 10:04 PM.

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05-30-2010, 04:05 PM	#467
neilmarr neilmarr Posts: 7,215 Karma: 6000059 Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Monaco-Menton, France Device: sony	Very neat and easily navigated, Ma ... and what a lovely smile! Good luck. Neil

05-30-2010, 09:30 PM	#469
GraceKrispy It's Dr. Penguin now! Posts: 3,909 Karma: 4705733 Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: (USA) Device: iPad mini, Samsung Note 3, Sony PRS-650 (rarely used now)	Great job, Vicki! I just went to get your book from smashwords, and I realized I have already downloaded it! I am pushing it up my queue quite a bit- the reviews are fantastic!

05-31-2010, 01:43 PM	#474
neilmarr neilmarr Posts: 7,215 Karma: 6000059 Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Monaco-Menton, France Device: sony	* Hasn’t anyone written a real stinker?* Sure, Don. Thing with real stinkers, though, is that you suss them out in a page or so and toss them aside. This doesn't provide much review material. Apart from the famous NO! there's nowt to report. I only ever review books I read ... which means I stuck with them to the very last word ... which means I have more positive things to say than negative, which means that my wee reviews tend to lean toward encouragement for author and potential reader, which means I win friends, influence people and pick up air hostesses. Hoots. Neil PS: I was, of course, jesting about the air hostesses. N

05-31-2010, 09:48 PM	#475
JamesACooke Junior Member Posts: 5 Karma: 10000 Join Date: May 2010 Location: Massachusetts Device: none	Looking for something funny to read - then check out the novel "Rent A Family." Leo Zepka is stuck in a nursing home, so he hires two actors to portray the children who never visit him. With the actors' help, Leo escapes from the home and flees to Florida -- only to have his children go after him in this poignant comic work of fiction.

06-01-2010, 07:50 AM	#478
nomesque Snooty Bestselling Author Posts: 1,485 Karma: 1000000 Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Ipswich, QLD, Australia Device: PRS-650	LOOK!!! From the Queen of Shocking the Bible Belt Senseless comes yet another stunning ebook destined for mixed reviews by the bucketload!!! Maisy May is a story about growing up a Christian, and doing a really, really bad job of it. Sex. Rock n roll. Gay coffee-drinking. Guitars in church. This book has it ALL. And this is only Part 1!! Only $1.99 - cheaper than a cup of coffee, gay or otherwise.