Silliness The 2-sentences-per-post story (starring a mysterious blonde psockpuppet?) - Page 30

MJK2111 · 07-12-2010, 02:16 PM

A little too quickly, and in a very menacing tone, Bugs blurted out "Leave the Llama out of this...he's all mine!" Everyone in the room cringed, as they all knew what that meant.

LazyScot · 07-12-2010, 02:37 PM

Before my imagination had a chance to get out of neutral, Bugs had lept onto Louie with a shout of "Yee Haw" and was riding him round the room like my demented friend Jessie making sure that the Mayor's office was trashed in the process.

"Now, you can dispose of them, and Daffy, thwaque Mister Sayd again to be on the safe side," Bugs said when eventually Louie collapsed unconscious to the ground almost on top of me, causing a groan to sneak past my lips -- followed by blackness as Daffy succeeded this time in turning out my lights.

MJK2111 · 07-12-2010, 04:15 PM

I woke up wondering where the freight train was that had hit me and why my mouth tasted of duck. I understood the latter when I coughed out a mouthful of Daffy's feathers.

LazyScot · 07-12-2010, 04:53 PM

The juddering ride came to a halt and a few moments later the tarpauling covering me and, it transpired, Louie in the back of the decrepit pickup was pulled off by a couple of the Mayor's weasle hench-animals revealing a dark desert landscape lit by the ghostly light of a waxing gibbous moon -- I'd been out for a good five or six hours, and suffering more than a little from being hog-tied to Louie by some sort of wierd handcuffs (I was beginning to have even more doubts about our Mayor, and that was saying something).

"Don't bother shooting them, just tip them out and let the rattlers get 'em; the sun'll be up in a couple of hours," said one of the weasles as the back of the pick-up tipped us uncermoniously (and extremely painfully) onto a landscape that include a couple of barrel cactii directly under us, and then drove off back over the desert, presumably back in the direction of the nearest road.

LazyScot · 07-12-2010, 07:16 PM

After several minutes of very painful attempts at movement and extensive usage of some very base anglo-saxon vocabulary (prompted by a nearly dislocated sholder), I managed to stir Louie back to consciousness, and explained our situtation -- tied-up with handcuffs, in the middle of a desert miles from help and labelled as rattler food.

"I don't suppose you've seen a toad, have you?" was his cryptic response to our apparently hopeless situation.

poohbear_nc · 07-13-2010, 09:03 AM

As a matter of fact, I had seen that toad earlier, and .... wait a minute! I remembered the slimy key I had pocketed!

MJK2111 · 07-13-2010, 10:15 AM

We sidled over to one another and I told Louie to reach into my pocket and grab the key. After a few moments, I said "The key, Louie. You're supposed to be grabbing the key!"

poohbear_nc · 07-13-2010, 11:08 AM

After a few more interpersonal incursions, Louie managed to extract the slimy key. Of course it was so slippery, he immediately swallowed it!

MJK2111 · 07-13-2010, 11:25 AM

It was at that exact moment that I had a very disturbing thought enter my head; "What does one use as a laxative on a llama, and where in the desert might I find it?"

The options were almost too horrendous to consider.

LazyScot · 07-13-2010, 01:17 PM

Fortunately at that point Louie hiccuped the key back into his mouth where he deftly held it as he unlocked me and then let me, somewhat reluctantly, take the key so that I could release him.

"Before I release you, I want some answers on who you are, what Alice is up to, what your interest in the Mayor is, whether or not Mr Bunny is also Mr Big, where the ape fits into all this, exactly what is so interesting about the photos and who the heck that toad was," I demaned as I carefully removed barrel cactus spines from various tender parts of my anatomy and made a mental note to add copious quanties of medication and scotch (for medicinal purposes, of course) to the expenses side of my bill.

poohbear_nc · 07-14-2010, 11:35 AM

Louie just stared at me, dribbling toad slime from his mouth. I gave up for now on the interrogation and tried to figure out if I could ride a llama out of this farking desert!

LazyScot · 07-14-2010, 01:58 PM

"Sorry about that," said Louie as a very unpleasant smell enveloped us and we started following the truck tracks at a very brisk pace, "but toad slime acts as a powerful laxative on llamas."

"The toad was Trevor; he's a friend of mine who's been trying to gather information in secret on the Mayor and some very strange links he has to somewhere referred to as 51 which is supposed to be were Mr Big stays, but I have no idea what Mr Bunny is upto, or why the photos are so importnat."

poohbear_nc · 07-15-2010, 12:01 PM

It was a long slog back to the main road, especially following an incontinent llama. But we finally made it, and I began to try and thumb a ride back to civilization.

MJK2111 · 07-15-2010, 12:31 PM

The llama and I decided to hitchhike in shifts; one thumbs while the other sleeps, with Louie taking the first shift. I slept fitfully for roughly two hours, and awoke to find Louie sitting down; when questioned about why he wasn't thumbing a ride, he simply replied "Llamas don't have thumbs, dumb ass!"

poohbear_nc · 07-15-2010, 12:32 PM

I began wishing I still had that toad to teach that llama a lesson! Then I heard the sound of an approaching car - a big one by the sound of its motor!

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07-12-2010, 02:16 PM	#436
MJK2111 FUBAR! Posts: 1,946 Karma: 15018767 Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: Woodstock, IL Device: Kindle 3, Samsung Galaxy Note 10.1 S	A little too quickly, and in a very menacing tone, Bugs blurted out "Leave the Llama out of this...he's all mine!" Everyone in the room cringed, as they all knew what that meant.

07-12-2010, 02:37 PM	#437
LazyScot DSil Posts: 3,201 Karma: 6895096 Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Hants, UK Device: Kindle, Cybook	Before my imagination had a chance to get out of neutral, Bugs had lept onto Louie with a shout of "Yee Haw" and was riding him round the room like my demented friend Jessie making sure that the Mayor's office was trashed in the process. "Now, you can dispose of them, and Daffy, thwaque Mister Sayd again to be on the safe side," Bugs said when eventually Louie collapsed unconscious to the ground almost on top of me, causing a groan to sneak past my lips -- followed by blackness as Daffy succeeded this time in turning out my lights.

07-12-2010, 04:15 PM	#438
MJK2111 FUBAR! Posts: 1,946 Karma: 15018767 Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: Woodstock, IL Device: Kindle 3, Samsung Galaxy Note 10.1 S	I woke up wondering where the freight train was that had hit me and why my mouth tasted of duck. I understood the latter when I coughed out a mouthful of Daffy's feathers.

07-12-2010, 04:53 PM	#439
LazyScot DSil Posts: 3,201 Karma: 6895096 Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Hants, UK Device: Kindle, Cybook	The juddering ride came to a halt and a few moments later the tarpauling covering me and, it transpired, Louie in the back of the decrepit pickup was pulled off by a couple of the Mayor's weasle hench-animals revealing a dark desert landscape lit by the ghostly light of a waxing gibbous moon -- I'd been out for a good five or six hours, and suffering more than a little from being hog-tied to Louie by some sort of wierd handcuffs (I was beginning to have even more doubts about our Mayor, and that was saying something). "Don't bother shooting them, just tip them out and let the rattlers get 'em; the sun'll be up in a couple of hours," said one of the weasles as the back of the pick-up tipped us uncermoniously (and extremely painfully) onto a landscape that include a couple of barrel cactii directly under us, and then drove off back over the desert, presumably back in the direction of the nearest road.

07-12-2010, 07:16 PM	#440
LazyScot DSil Posts: 3,201 Karma: 6895096 Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Hants, UK Device: Kindle, Cybook	After several minutes of very painful attempts at movement and extensive usage of some very base anglo-saxon vocabulary (prompted by a nearly dislocated sholder), I managed to stir Louie back to consciousness, and explained our situtation -- tied-up with handcuffs, in the middle of a desert miles from help and labelled as rattler food. "I don't suppose you've seen a toad, have you?" was his cryptic response to our apparently hopeless situation.

07-13-2010, 09:03 AM	#441
poohbear_nc Bah! Humbug! Posts: 63,889 Karma: 135242149 Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Durham, NC Device: Every Kindle Ever Made & To Be Made!	As a matter of fact, I had seen that toad earlier, and .... wait a minute! I remembered the slimy key I had pocketed!

07-13-2010, 10:15 AM	#442
MJK2111 FUBAR! Posts: 1,946 Karma: 15018767 Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: Woodstock, IL Device: Kindle 3, Samsung Galaxy Note 10.1 S	We sidled over to one another and I told Louie to reach into my pocket and grab the key. After a few moments, I said "The key, Louie. You're supposed to be grabbing the key!"

07-13-2010, 11:08 AM	#443
poohbear_nc Bah! Humbug! Posts: 63,889 Karma: 135242149 Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Durham, NC Device: Every Kindle Ever Made & To Be Made!	After a few more interpersonal incursions, Louie managed to extract the slimy key. Of course it was so slippery, he immediately swallowed it!

07-13-2010, 11:25 AM	#444
MJK2111 FUBAR! Posts: 1,946 Karma: 15018767 Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: Woodstock, IL Device: Kindle 3, Samsung Galaxy Note 10.1 S	It was at that exact moment that I had a very disturbing thought enter my head; "What does one use as a laxative on a llama, and where in the desert might I find it?" The options were almost too horrendous to consider.

07-13-2010, 01:17 PM	#445
LazyScot DSil Posts: 3,201 Karma: 6895096 Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Hants, UK Device: Kindle, Cybook	Fortunately at that point Louie hiccuped the key back into his mouth where he deftly held it as he unlocked me and then let me, somewhat reluctantly, take the key so that I could release him. "Before I release you, I want some answers on who you are, what Alice is up to, what your interest in the Mayor is, whether or not Mr Bunny is also Mr Big, where the ape fits into all this, exactly what is so interesting about the photos and who the heck that toad was," I demaned as I carefully removed barrel cactus spines from various tender parts of my anatomy and made a mental note to add copious quanties of medication and scotch (for medicinal purposes, of course) to the expenses side of my bill.

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07-14-2010, 11:35 AM	#446
poohbear_nc Bah! Humbug! Posts: 63,889 Karma: 135242149 Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Durham, NC Device: Every Kindle Ever Made & To Be Made!	Louie just stared at me, dribbling toad slime from his mouth. I gave up for now on the interrogation and tried to figure out if I could ride a llama out of this farking desert!

07-14-2010, 01:58 PM	#447
LazyScot DSil Posts: 3,201 Karma: 6895096 Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Hants, UK Device: Kindle, Cybook	"Sorry about that," said Louie as a very unpleasant smell enveloped us and we started following the truck tracks at a very brisk pace, "but toad slime acts as a powerful laxative on llamas." "The toad was Trevor; he's a friend of mine who's been trying to gather information in secret on the Mayor and some very strange links he has to somewhere referred to as 51 which is supposed to be were Mr Big stays, but I have no idea what Mr Bunny is upto, or why the photos are so importnat."

07-15-2010, 12:01 PM	#448
poohbear_nc Bah! Humbug! Posts: 63,889 Karma: 135242149 Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Durham, NC Device: Every Kindle Ever Made & To Be Made!	It was a long slog back to the main road, especially following an incontinent llama. But we finally made it, and I began to try and thumb a ride back to civilization.

07-15-2010, 12:31 PM	#449
MJK2111 FUBAR! Posts: 1,946 Karma: 15018767 Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: Woodstock, IL Device: Kindle 3, Samsung Galaxy Note 10.1 S	The llama and I decided to hitchhike in shifts; one thumbs while the other sleeps, with Louie taking the first shift. I slept fitfully for roughly two hours, and awoke to find Louie sitting down; when questioned about why he wasn't thumbing a ride, he simply replied "Llamas don't have thumbs, dumb ass!"

07-15-2010, 12:32 PM	#450
poohbear_nc Bah! Humbug! Posts: 63,889 Karma: 135242149 Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Durham, NC Device: Every Kindle Ever Made & To Be Made!	I began wishing I still had that toad to teach that llama a lesson! Then I heard the sound of an approaching car - a big one by the sound of its motor!