Unutterably Silly This thread is NOT about T....G...!!!

[ShortNCuddlyAm]

I want to hear option 3!!!

[zelda_pinwheel]

Originally Posted by LazyScot

"Thank you for selecting an explanation of DSil. Unfortunately all my explanations are busy at the moment. Remember you call is important to me, so please hold and your call will be transferred as soon as an explanation becomes available. To make you wait more pleasant, you may choose between hold music by pressing 5."

pfff. slackers. we all know those explanations are all "busy" having a nap.

And with that a medley of Abba's greatest hits started playing, with predicatable results. Zelda pressed 5, nearly breaking the phone in the process.

"Welcome to the hold music selection service. for a medley of Abba's greatest hits press 0, for a medley of Eurovision winners, please press 1, for a medley of Eurovision runner's up, please press 2. For a medley of Abba's greatest hits performed by Lordi and accompanied by St. Winifred's School choir press 3, for a medley of Andy Stewart's greatest Hogmany hits, press 4, for voulez-vous and super trouper played backwards on the bagpipes press 5, for a 1kHz test tone, press 6, for a hearing test press 7, for a recitation of Vogon poetry press 8, and for Eddie Reader press 9."

Originally Posted by ShortNCuddlyAm

I want to hear option 3!!!

hmph. yes, well, as it happens *you* are not making this call. i don't know who eddie reader is but i'm pretty sure that of the lot, vogon poetry is going to be the least objectionable.

[kindlekitten]

oh my!

*tsk tsk*

[LazyScot]

Originally Posted by ShortNCuddlyAm

I want to hear option 3!!!

"Your call has been transferred to the Taste and Decency Control Section. Unfortunately your selection has been deemed as exceeding the European Convention on Acceptability in Musical Performances. Your details have been recorded and will be passed immediately to the relevant authorities. This call will now terminate."

<click.>

Originally Posted by zelda_pinwheel

hmph. yes, well, as it happens *you* are not making this call. i don't know who eddie reader is but i'm pretty sure that of the lot, vogon poetry is going to be the least objectionable.

"Thank you for you selection. The requirements of the new European Union directive on mental health monitoring and early treatment require that all persons showing signs of mental deterioration should have their details passed immediately for appropriate processing. Your details have now been so passed. You should either hear from an appropriate psychiatrist for assessment, or by a political party for appointment to high office in the Eurpoean Commission."

[zelda_pinwheel]

Originally Posted by LazyScot

"Your call has been transferred to the Taste and Decency Control Section. Unfortunately your selection has been deemed as exceeding the European Convention on Acceptability in Musical Performances. Your details have been recorded and will be passed immediately to the relevant authorities. This call will now terminate."

<click.>

the what convention now ? i don't believe there's any such convention nor any such control section, or they would have put a stop to eurovision (and abba !!!!) years ago. this is just more nap-taking on the job, isn't it ?

"Thank you for you selection. The requirements of the new European Union directive on mental health monitoring and early treatment require that all persons showing signs of mental deterioration should have their details passed immediately for appropriate processing. Your details have now been so passed. You should either hear from an appropriate psychiatrist for assessment, or by a political party for appointment to high office in the Eurpoean Commission."

nooooooooo !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! not high office in the european commission !!!! i take it back !!! i take it back !!! damned, i knew i should have taken my chances with eddi reader !!!!!!

[rebarnmom]

Thanks VR! Those are way cool!

Originally Posted by zelda_pinwheel

actually i seriously covet one of those sun jars. (curse you, doggy !!!)

Oh, me too!

Originally Posted by montsnmags

Link to Lifehacker DIY (which also has Instructables link) here:

http://lifehacker.com/5315357/create...ition/gallery/

Thanks for the DIY directions Marc!



Oh! My sincerest apologies for interrupting this game of... phone tag?... extreme edition?

[LazyScot]

Originally Posted by zelda_pinwheel

i knew i should have taken my chances with eddi reader

In an attempt to prevent politicians and psychiatrists contacting her, Zelda re-dials and eventually gets back to the hold music, and selects Eddi Reader. Whereupon...

"Congratulations. You have proved yourself of sufficient honour and worthiness to be told of the DSil.

DSil, or Doctorate of Silliness, is an honorary degree only offered by a very small number of institutions, and then only to the tiny number of people who have provided extensive services to silliness. In the case of LazyScot, it was awarded by the University of Nether-Zees, which is based in the small hamlet of Snoozing-under-Duvet. His DSil was awarded for his discovery, categorisation, contraction, recovery from and steps towards a cure, of the infrunituphage(*). This exceptionally contagious phage comes in a number of closely related forms, all of which are particularly insidious and deadly. LazyScot successfully isolated and identified many variants phage, including the colloquially named forms "jobsworth", "health and safety", "professionalism" and "adulthood". His discovery and subsequent work was fundamental to the founding of the Infrunituphage Containment Executive (and its Weapons of Infrunituphage Negation and Elimination) of WHO, and he reportedly spends much time helping (himself to) ICE-WINE.

(*) the name is taken from the latin infrunitus."

<click>

[zelda_pinwheel]

Originally Posted by LazyScot

In an attempt to prevent politicians and psychiatrists contacting her, Zelda re-dials and eventually gets back to the hold music, and selects Eddi Reader. Whereupon...

"Congratulations. You have proved yourself of sufficient honour and worthiness to be told of the DSil.

at last !

DSil, or Doctorate of Silliness, is an honorary degree only offered by a very small number of institutions, and then only to the tiny number of people who have provided extensive services to silliness. In the case of LazyScot, it was awarded by the University of Nether-Zees, which is based in the small hamlet of Snoozing-under-Duvet. His DSil was awarded for his discovery, categorisation, contraction, recovery from and steps towards a cure, of the infrunituphage(*). This exceptionally contagious phage comes in a number of closely related forms, all of which are particularly insidious and deadly. LazyScot successfully isolated and identified many variants phage, including the colloquially named forms "jobsworth", "health and safety", "professionalism" and "adulthood". His discovery and subsequent work was fundamental to the founding of the Infrunituphage Containment Executive (and its Weapons of Infrunituphage Negation and Elimination) of WHO, and he reportedly spends much time helping (himself to) ICE-WINE.

(*) the name is taken from the latin infrunitus."

<click>

lazyscot, not only do you deserve *several* honorary DSil's for your heroic efforts in combatting the terrifying scourge of infrunituphage, but also, you shall be receiving your e-embossed e-vellum e-invitation to the Palace of Pinwheel to receive an honour in the name of the entire kingdom. you shall be pronounced Ineffable Chevalier of the Eternal Silliness Consequential to Remarkable Endeavours and Actions of Magnanimity. you can come in pyjamas, if you like.

[GraceKrispy]

Oh crap! Is it Christmas already? Iʻm behind again....

Can I have this one please?? It looks like fun! Ignore the "out of stock" part, Iʻm sure you have some sway there and can make it work!

Iʻll get you this one! (MR does have a company credit card for our use, right??)

[GeoffC]

< click >

[GeoffC]

I'm sorry, the number you have called is not available....I'm sorry, the number you have called is not available....I'm sorry, the number you have called is not available....I'm sorry, the number you have called is not available....I'm sorry, the number you have called is not available....I'm sorry, the number you have called is not available....I'm sorry, the number you have called is not available....I'm sorry, the number you have called is not available....Oh alright, if you are that persistent, please press 9 to confirm you are not insane......hello, I'm sorry your call cannot be taken at this time.....please call again later ......

[ShortNCuddlyAm]

Originally Posted by GraceKrispy

(MR does have a company credit card for our use, right??)

I hope so, otherwise it means I've been buying stuff on my card!!

[Slite]

Originally Posted by zelda_pinwheel

the what convention now ? i don't believe there's any such convention nor any such control section, or they would have put a stop to eurovision (and abba !!!!) years ago. this is just more nap-taking on the job, isn't it ?


nooooooooo !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! not high office in the european commission !!!! i take it back !!! i take it back !!! damned, i knew i should have taken my chances with eddi reader !!!!!!

Stop Abba? You know that is like trying to stop a PNS-attack, futile!

Super Trouper beams are gonna blind me
But I won't feel blue
Like I always do
'Cause somewhere in the crowd there's you

I was sick and tired of everything
When I called you last night from Glasgow
All I do is eat and sleep and sing
Wishing every show was the last show
(Wishing every show was the last show)
So imagine I was glad to hear you're coming
(Glad to hear you're coming)
Suddenly I feel all right
(And suddenly it's gonna be)
And it's gonna be so different
When I'm on the stage tonight

Tonight the
Super Trouper lights are gonna find me
Shining like the sun
(Sup-p-per Troup-p-per)
Smiling, having fun
(Sup-p-per Troup-p-per)
Feeling like a number one
Tonight the
Super Trouper beams are gonna blind me
But I won't feel blue
(Sup-p-per Troup-p-per)
Like I always do
(Sup-p-per Troup-p-per)
'Cause somewhere in the crowd there's you

Facing twenty thousand of your friends
How can anyone be so lonely
Part of a success that never ends
Still I'm thinking about you only
(Still I'm thinking about you only)
There are moments when I think I'm going crazy
(Think I'm going crazy)
But it's gonna be alright
(You'll soon be changing everything)
Everything will be so different
When I'm on the stage tonight

Tonight the
Super Trouper lights are gonna find me
Shining like the sun
(Sup-p-per Troup-p-per)
Smiling, having fun
(Sup-p-per Troup-p-per)
Feeling like a number one
Tonight the
Super Trouper beams are gonna blind me
But I won't feel blue
(Sup-p-per Troup-p-per)
Like I always do
(Sup-p-per Troup-p-per)
'Cause somewhere in the crowd there's you

So I'll be there when you arrive
The sight of you will prove to me I'm still alive
And when you take me in your arms
And hold me tight
I know it's gonna mean so much tonight

Tonight the
Super Trouper lights are gonna find me
Shining like the sun
(Sup-p-per Troup-p-per)
Smiling, having fun
(Sup-p-per Troup-p-per)
Feeling like a number one
Tonight the
Super Trouper beams are gonna blind me
But I won't feel blue
(Sup-p-per Troup-p-per)
Like I always do
(Sup-p-per Troup-p-per)
'Cause somewhere in the crowd there's you

[repeat and fade]

[GeoffC]

[repeat and fade]