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Old 02-18-2012, 07:11 AM   #31
John Barlow
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A delicious plate of jugged hair recently!
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Old 02-19-2012, 01:04 PM   #32
EileenG
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A delicious plate of jugged hair recently!
Cough, cough!
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Old 04-21-2012, 01:30 AM   #33
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Just saw this one in a Tums description:

Relives acid indigestion, heartburn, sour stomach
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Old 04-21-2012, 02:08 AM   #34
Justin Nemo
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I saw an ad once for a Tranny Manager. Guess it must have been for one of those uni-sex shops.
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Old 04-26-2012, 04:09 PM   #35
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I included a section on malapropisms in Something to Read on the Plane and have been collecting new ones ever since. I started a thread asking for contributions and some were hilarious. The best one in my book (I think) is:

The beggar held out his hat hoping someone would throw in their spare penis.

(you did realise it should be pennies!)

Most of my original ones came from students' writing assignments.
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Old 05-04-2012, 05:07 PM   #36
James_Wilde
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I'd guess "space vampire".
Then my son would go for that book. He (almost) refuses to read a book if it doesn't have aliens, vampires or zombies, and preferably two or more of them.
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Old 05-04-2012, 05:13 PM   #37
twowheels
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"I was feeling a little horse."

And no, I wasn't reading animal porn.
http://www.explosm.net/comics/985/
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Old 05-14-2012, 06:13 AM   #38
theapatra
author of Water Witch
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Misuse of homonyms is often, sadly, down to ignorance rather than typing errors.


For me: it's my VR software. yikes. some real lovelies there.
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Old 05-14-2012, 06:17 AM   #39
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For me: it's my VR software. yikes. some real lovelies there.
Virtual Reality?

Andrew
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Old 05-16-2012, 08:02 PM   #40
Rick G
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Rick G has never once had to say 'it's on the tip of my tongue...'Rick G has never once had to say 'it's on the tip of my tongue...'Rick G has never once had to say 'it's on the tip of my tongue...'Rick G has never once had to say 'it's on the tip of my tongue...'Rick G has never once had to say 'it's on the tip of my tongue...'Rick G has never once had to say 'it's on the tip of my tongue...'Rick G has never once had to say 'it's on the tip of my tongue...'Rick G has never once had to say 'it's on the tip of my tongue...'Rick G has never once had to say 'it's on the tip of my tongue...'Rick G has never once had to say 'it's on the tip of my tongue...'Rick G has never once had to say 'it's on the tip of my tongue...'
 
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I had a good one in my latest. Made it through me, my wife, beta readers, and a proofreader before it was finally caught, almost by accident.

"He upholstered his gun"

Guess he decided, with the bad guys advancing and all, that he really wanted the paisley grips.
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Old 05-25-2012, 03:19 PM   #41
Todd Young
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I've heard that one of Enid Blyton's Noddy stories contains the line: "Noddy woke one morning feeling a little gay."

Who was he, that little gay?
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Old 05-25-2012, 11:00 PM   #42
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I had a good one in my latest. Made it through me, my wife, beta readers, and a proofreader before it was finally caught, almost by accident.

"He upholstered his gun"

Guess he decided, with the bad guys advancing and all, that he really wanted the paisley grips.
That's a good one! I can see how it got past so many readers, but so funny!!
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Old 05-28-2012, 05:55 AM   #43
theredhairedcrow
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theredhairedcrow began at the beginning.
 
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Maybe because English is my second language, sometimes I have tendency to type the wrong words that sound similar. Rather like a lot of people I guess: "there" for "their" or "right" for write." I have a proofreader who especially looks for this for me because if I happen to be more tired, for example, I do it more often.

The other one is really annoying but funny (sometimes) when I type too fast and mean to write "site" and I accidentally type "sh*t."
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Old 05-28-2012, 06:05 AM   #44
orlok
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One that I have done more than once to work colleages is to end my email with "Retards" instead of "Regards". Something Freudian, perhaps...?
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