Silliness Add/Read a good joke to lighten your day - Page 254

Fbone · 10-09-2011, 05:10 PM

I am reading a very interesting book about anti-gravity...I just can't put it down.

Stitchawl · 10-10-2011, 01:52 AM

A blonde asked someone what time it was, and they told her it was 4:45. The blonde, with a puzzled look on her face replied,

"You know, it's the weirdest thing, I have been asking that question all day, and each time I get a different answer."

Stitchawl

wannabee · 10-10-2011, 05:40 AM

Bert and Mable had had a naughty night to celebrate their 60th anniversary. Sitting naked at the breakfast table Mable says to Bert.
"Berty boy, you still make my breast burn with lust."
Bert puts his teeth back in and says "Mable, lean back, your t!ts are in the porridge."

Format C: · 10-10-2011, 08:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bookpossum

"Surely you wouldn't send a knight out on a dog like this?"

And, being non-english, I just don't get it...........

pdurrant · 10-10-2011, 09:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Format C:

And, being non-english, I just don't get it...........

There a saying, "I wouldn't send a dog out on a night like this." So it's a terrible pun on night/knight and a mixed up old saying.

(The k in knight is silent, like the k in knife.)

wannabee · 10-10-2011, 09:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Format C:

And, being non-english, I just don't get it...........

It's sort of . . . . Like this . . . .
Where as in the Third World, there are never rainy nights, in the real world it rains down with thunder storms. That's when you would never send a dog out on a night like that.

Spoiler:

pdurrant · 10-10-2011, 09:09 AM

Spoonerisms are the wowist form of lit.

wannabee · 10-10-2011, 09:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pdurrant

Spoonerisms are the wowist form of lit.

Mate, you've gottiest me on that remark. .??

pdurrant · 10-10-2011, 09:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wannabee

Mate, you've gottiest me on that remark. .??

If it's any comfort, I don't understand what you've just said, either!

A spoonerism is a mixing up of the initial (or other) sounds of two words. Named after the Reverend William Archibald Spooner, member of New College, Oxford, from 1860s to 1924.

Most that are attributed to him are unlikely to have really be uttered by him. Perhaps the most famous is making a toast to the monarch: "Three cheers for the queer old Dean!"

wannabee · 10-10-2011, 09:59 AM

I think I thank you, or do I thank that I think you.
I'm new at this give me a minute or so.

pilotbob · 10-10-2011, 10:12 AM

I'm not as think as you drunk I am.

pdurrant · 10-10-2011, 10:20 AM

"You'd better be prepared for the jump into hyperspace. It's unpleasantly like being drunk"

"What's so unpleasant about being drunk?"

"You ask a glass of water!"

wannabee · 10-10-2011, 10:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pdurrant

"You'd better be prepared for the jump into hyperspace. It's unpleasantly like being drunk"

"What's so unpleasant about being drunk?"

"You ask a glass of water!"

Arrrh!, but before the yellow bulldozers arrived. Ford made me bring my towel.

So here's to you with a big lump of putty in my armpit.

pfffffffft!

pdurrant · 10-10-2011, 10:53 AM

I'm not a pheasant plucker, I'm the pheasant plucker's mate;
I'm only plucking pheasants 'cos the pheasant plucker's late.

One song where it's vital to avoid spoonerisms....

pilotbob · 10-10-2011, 11:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pdurrant

I'm not a pheasant plucker, I'm the pheasant plucker's mate;
I'm only plucking pheasants 'cos the pheasant plucker's late.

One song where it's vital to avoid spoonerisms....

We can still Pluck Yew!

BOb

10-10-2011, 05:40 AM	#3798
wannabee Media Bloke Posts: 2,382 Karma: 113956855 Join Date: Sep 2010 Location: NSW - Australia Device: iOS	Bert and Mable had had a naughty night to celebrate their 60th anniversary. Sitting naked at the breakfast table Mable says to Bert. "Berty boy, you still make my breast burn with lust." Bert puts his teeth back in and says "Mable, lean back, your t!ts are in the porridge." Last edited by wannabee; 10-10-2011 at 08:20 AM. Reason: Exchanged i for ! to keep out of trouble

Similar Threads
Thread	Thread Starter	Forum	Replies	Last Post
Add from the Mobile Read Library?	danwdoo	Calibre	8	12-03-2014 06:03 PM
Good Day Eh!! :-)	Gedvondur	Introduce Yourself	12	07-22-2010 12:16 AM
Classic Is there a way to lighten the background?	rlsamson	Barnes & Noble NOOK	3	06-30-2010 04:56 PM
Read-in-Microsoft-Reader 1.1.3 add-in released	Alexander Turcic	Reading and Management	2	02-20-2006 03:47 AM

10-09-2011, 05:10 PM	#3796
Fbone Is that a sandwich? Posts: 8,296 Karma: 101697116 Join Date: Jun 2010 Device: Nook Glowlight Plus	I am reading a very interesting book about anti-gravity...I just can't put it down.

10-10-2011, 01:52 AM	#3797
Stitchawl Opsimath Posts: 12,344 Karma: 187123287 Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Chiang Mai, Northern Thailand Device: Sony PRS-650, iPhone 5, Kobo Glo, Sony PRS-350, iPad, Samsung Galaxy	A blonde asked someone what time it was, and they told her it was 4:45. The blonde, with a puzzled look on her face replied, "You know, it's the weirdest thing, I have been asking that question all day, and each time I get a different answer." Stitchawl

10-10-2011, 09:09 AM	#3802
pdurrant The Grand Mouse 高貴的老鼠 Posts: 73,988 Karma: 315160596 Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Norfolk, England Device: Kindle Oasis	Spoonerisms are the wowist form of lit.

10-10-2011, 09:59 AM	#3805
wannabee Media Bloke Posts: 2,382 Karma: 113956855 Join Date: Sep 2010 Location: NSW - Australia Device: iOS	I think I thank you, or do I thank that I think you. I'm new at this give me a minute or so.

10-10-2011, 10:12 AM	#3806
pilotbob Grand Sorcerer Posts: 19,832 Karma: 11844413 Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Tampa, FL USA Device: Kindle Touch	I'm not as think as you drunk I am.

10-10-2011, 10:20 AM	#3807
pdurrant The Grand Mouse 高貴的老鼠 Posts: 73,988 Karma: 315160596 Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Norfolk, England Device: Kindle Oasis	"You'd better be prepared for the jump into hyperspace. It's unpleasantly like being drunk" "What's so unpleasant about being drunk?" "You ask a glass of water!"

10-10-2011, 10:53 AM	#3809
pdurrant The Grand Mouse 高貴的老鼠 Posts: 73,988 Karma: 315160596 Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Norfolk, England Device: Kindle Oasis	I'm not a pheasant plucker, I'm the pheasant plucker's mate; I'm only plucking pheasants 'cos the pheasant plucker's late. One song where it's vital to avoid spoonerisms....