Unutterably Silly Add/Read a good joke to lighten your day

[Falcao]

[pilotbob]

Originally Posted by Falcao

HA! Reminds me of the earlier joke about the iBoob.

BOb

[Lycoming]

Something for everybody to be offended by here........

A man calls 911 and says "I think my wife is dead"! The operator says how do you know? He says "The sex is the same but the ironing is building up!"


My girlfriend thinks that I'm a stalker. Well, she's not exactly my girlfriend yet.

Went for my routine check up today and everything seemed to be going fine until he stuck his index finger up my butt! Do you think I should change dentists?


I was explaining to my wife last night that when you die you get reincarnated but must come back as a different creature. She said she would like to come back as a cow. I said, "You're obviously not listening”.

My wife has been missing a week now. Police said to prepare for the worst. So I have been to the thrift shop to get all her clothes back.

[orlok]

Two nuns are driving down a road late at night when a vampire jumps onto the hood of their car. The one nun says to the other, "Quick! Show him your cross!"

So the other nun leans out the window and shouts, "Get off our f--ing car!"

[Fbone]

Don't talk about yourself so much... we'll do that when you leave.

[Stitchawl]

Once upon a time, in a land far away,
a beautiful, independent, self assured princess
happened upon a frog as she sat, contemplating ecological issues on the
shores of an unpolluted pond in a verdant meadow near her castle.
The frog hopped into the princess' lap and said:
"Elegant Lady, I was once a handsome prince,
until an evil witch cast a spell upon me.
One kiss from you, however, and I will turn back
into the dapper, young prince that I am and then, my sweet, we can marry and
setup housekeeping in yon castle with my mother, where you can prepare my
meals, clean my clothes, bear my children, and forever feel grateful and
happy doing so.
That night, as the princess dined sumptuously
on a repast of lightly sautéed froglegs
seasoned in a white wine and onion cream sauce
she chuckled to herself and thought:
"I don't fu@king think so."



Stitchawl

[amward]

Originally Posted by Stitchawl

Once upon a time, in a land far away,
a beautiful, independent, self assured princess
happened upon a frog as she sat, contemplating ecological issues on the
shores of an unpolluted pond in a verdant meadow near her castle.
The frog hopped into the princess' lap and said:
"Elegant Lady, I was once a handsome prince,
until an evil witch cast a spell upon me.
One kiss from you, however, and I will turn back
into the dapper, young prince that I am and then, my sweet, we can marry and
setup housekeeping in yon castle with my mother, where you can prepare my
meals, clean my clothes, bear my children, and forever feel grateful and
happy doing so.
That night, as the princess dined sumptuously
on a repast of lightly sautéed froglegs
seasoned in a white wine and onion cream sauce
she chuckled to herself and thought:
"I don't fu@king think so."



Stitchawl

This is one of my all time favourites.

[Fbone]

Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing.

[Falcao]

[Fbone]

Drive-in banks were established so most of the cars today could see their real owners.

[Lycoming]

Now I'm fairly certain a dark haired chap type could have done something similar, or even a dark haired lady type. However both of them would have to be inebriated, whereas poor old Blondie finds she needs nothing extra in her bloodstream to assist her air-headedness.

Incoming!!!!!!!

[Falcao]

[maianhvk]

I'mma get youuuu!!!

ooh damn, never mind.

[WT Sharpe]

Originally Posted by Lycoming

Now I'm fairly certain a dark haired chap type could have done something similar, or even a dark haired lady type. However both of them would have to be inebriated, whereas poor old Blondie finds she needs nothing extra in her bloodstream to assist her air-headedness.

Incoming!!!!!!!

OUCH! That had to hurt, even with those massive shock absorbers!

[pilotbob]

Originally Posted by Lycoming

Now I'm fairly certain a dark haired chap type could have done something similar, or even a dark haired lady type. However both of them would have to be inebriated, whereas poor old Blondie finds she needs nothing extra in her bloodstream to assist her air-headedness.

Incoming!!!!!!!

I'm sure the blonde ladies hate the stereo type, however they still have those in their population that continue to reinforce it.

BOb