What do you when someone gives you a REALLY crappy Christmas present?

[WT Sharpe]

Christmas. Bah! Humbug! All I wanted was a Snug-Wow, and I didn't even get that!

[PennyPie]

I gotta ask... what the hell is it?

Is this one? (1st time adding a photo...don't know if this'll work)

[WT Sharpe]

Originally Posted by PennyPie

Is this one? (1st time adding a photo...don't know if this'll work)

I know that guy--that's Harry!

[PennyPie]

I know that guy--that's Harry!

By golly, you're right...didn't realize...just googled it!

[poshm]

I always like to think it's the thought that counts - although some of the presents I receive do seem to show a distinct lack of thought unfortunately.

I'm too polite to do anything other than find some redeeming feature in all the gifts I'm given - even with the bright and shiny purple handbag that a good friend gave me (I loathe handbags and the colour purple) and the egg cooker gadget that my parents bought for me (Um I've been cooking for years now and I can cook eggs to perfection, thanks!) and the candlestick I was given minus a candle to actually go in it - I don't do house decor, and now I have to go buy a candle too!

My parents on the other hand are brutally honest about presents they receive if they don't like them which can be very hurtful. A few years back they wanted a tea-maker, well tea-makers (unlike coffee makers) are quite hard to get hold of. Anyway after spending a lot of time and money getting one, they declared that it looked like a great big ugly, black bin. Those were the exact words I believe and they went on and on for a good half hour about why they wouldn't have the gift. It ruined my Christmas day (I was cooking for them as well) because they were so unpleasant and ungrateful about it.

So please spare a little thought if you do decide to reject your gift - with the best will in the world, people don't always get it right!

[Lirael]

I always just smile and say thank you anyways, because I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. I know I'm difficult to buy gifts for - in my family, people don't generally do surprise gifts. You get asked point-blank at Thanksgiving, "What do you want for Christmas?" and that's what you end up getting, except I can never really think of anything that it wouldn't just be easier to get myself. In recent years I've been telling people to just *not* give me gifts but they don't always listen. So even if I don't like it I smile, say thank you, and try to find a practical use for whatever-it-is, because I know they probably had a trying time picking it out, and they're doing it 'cause they care.

That's why when I get gifts for people I try to stick to something pretty generic and usually consumable (like, a box of fancy candy, for someone who likes sweets) unless someone's said exactly what they're hoping to get.

[HarryT]

Originally Posted by PennyPie

Is this one? (1st time adding a photo...don't know if this'll work)

Not too far off, actually. It was some VERY young child's "Doctor Who Playset". Goodness only knows what she thought I was going to do with it.

We have now "had words", and agreed that it would be mutually beneficial to simply exchange cards in the future.

[Patricia]

I've taken to buying consumable gifts whenever I'm not certain about the recipient's tastes. So they get wine, chocolate or toiletries. This is surprisingly successful and doesn't add to people's clutter. Also they can easily pass the gift on, or share it with friends if it's not quite to their liking.

But I'm rather surprised that your sister got it so wrong, Harry. My brother even trusts me to choose clothes for him.

[HarryT]

Apparently she thought that it was "funny". She now understands that I did not find it to be so . Totally agree with you about edible/drinkable gifts. Always welcome . In fact my parents gave me a lovely "Christmas food hamper" this year, which was great.

[JSWolf]

I got most of the parts for a new desktop computer, an M&M mug, and some money, and some Hershey Kisses. I did fine as far as gifts go.

And I know I gave appropriate gifts. One of them did have to be returned due to the size. That was ok with me. Things like that happen

[GA Russell]

Originally Posted by Patricia

My brother even trusts me to choose clothes for him.

That's me! Close to 100% of my wardrobe has been given to me by the women of my family.

[nekokami]

Originally Posted by HarryT

Not too far off, actually. It was some VERY young child's "Doctor Who Playset". Goodness only knows what she thought I was going to do with it.

We have now "had words", and agreed that it would be mutually beneficial to simply exchange cards in the future.

Seems like she saw it and thought of you, not realizing that you're only into higher-quality models. Some people do have toys in their offices, you know. (Reminder to self: post photo of desk....) But if you can both agree to exchange cards with no hard feelings, that sounds like the best solution.

My kids did this sort of thing a lot when they were younger, and even my mom (who usually has excellent taste) has given me a couple of items that left me scratching my head. (e.g. a pink knitted vest this year... I'd have thought everyone who knows me even slightly would know how little chance I have of wearing something pink. I "loaned" it to my younger daughter, who still adores the color.)

I used to give a short reminder lecture to my kids right before we would get to relatives' houses at the holidays, explaining that "I don't like this" is never an option when opening a gift, nor is "I already have this." The correct response is always "thank you," though it is not necessary to go on about how much one likes a gift if one doesn't. (If a gift is completely inappropriate, I take it up with the relative in question after all the gifts are opened.)

This practice had an amusing side-effect early on. I'd given my mother a nail brush in her stocking, and my younger daughter knew she already had one. She wisely and thoughtfully shared the advice that "it's ok that you already have one, Gramma. You can give this one to someone else after Christmas." Ok, at least I know she was listening....