The Vent and Rant Thread

[covingtoncat73]

Originally Posted by Hitch

Ladies and Germs:

As the subject line says, the winner of the "You Can't Make This S**t Up" category is....

Spoiler:

No salutation, no nothing; this email just launches right in to...

Your book at (DELETED for client privacy), on page 37, expresses the Lord's name in vein, making me sin, because I need to read out loud, including such book, to learn how to have sex with a man anally, which I feel, as an expression of love, is just as Christian as sex with a woman. I think that God leaves out the virtues of anal sex from The Holy Bible just to make people figure out the truth about being fully human. If God told the world that anal sex were righteous, people's own soul-searching catharses would be hindered from worldwide spiritual development. I certainly am not God, but for some reason, some people who have not yet figured out how to be fully human, as far as I am concerned, often maliciously coerce me, blatantly subliminally, into reading out loud, as I virtually constantly sense and perceive people listening to, watching, transmitting epithets at, raising noise volumes at, kinetically pushing, and blatantly mimicking me, including, from what I am sensing and perceiving right now, maliciously mimicking my own keyboard actions through their own manual typewriter keystrokes. In spite of my own beliefs in the virtues of sexual acts of being gay, which The Holy Bible may or may not shun, as scriptures about "sodomites," historically meaning "anal prostitutes," not just those who engage in anal sex, and "men laying down with men," historically meaning "gay adultery," not just gay relationships, are ambiguous and vague, I do agree with The Holy Bible's scriptures about the sinfulness of saying the Lord's name in vein. How do I order a new edition of such book, from which have been deleted any and all expressions of the Lord's name in vein?

Just another day at ye olden Biz. The book in question is a "how to" guide, by a TV expert in sex, and, as indicated, it's about male/anal sex. (There's a version for women, as well).

Yuppperdoodle. Stuff like this makes me unable to wait to get up and tackle the day.

Hitch

OMG. I can't even, WTF am I reading, etc. *Boggles*

[Cinisajoy]

Originally Posted by Hitch

Ladies and Germs:

As the subject line says, the winner of the "You Can't Make This S**t Up" category is....

Spoiler:

No salutation, no nothing; this email just launches right in to...

Your book at (DELETED for client privacy), on page 37, expresses the Lord's name in vein, making me sin, because I need to read out loud, including such book, to learn how to have sex with a man anally, which I feel, as an expression of love, is just as Christian as sex with a woman. I think that God leaves out the virtues of anal sex from The Holy Bible just to make people figure out the truth about being fully human. If God told the world that anal sex were righteous, people's own soul-searching catharses would be hindered from worldwide spiritual development. I certainly am not God, but for some reason, some people who have not yet figured out how to be fully human, as far as I am concerned, often maliciously coerce me, blatantly subliminally, into reading out loud, as I virtually constantly sense and perceive people listening to, watching, transmitting epithets at, raising noise volumes at, kinetically pushing, and blatantly mimicking me, including, from what I am sensing and perceiving right now, maliciously mimicking my own keyboard actions through their own manual typewriter keystrokes. In spite of my own beliefs in the virtues of sexual acts of being gay, which The Holy Bible may or may not shun, as scriptures about "sodomites," historically meaning "anal prostitutes," not just those who engage in anal sex, and "men laying down with men," historically meaning "gay adultery," not just gay relationships, are ambiguous and vague, I do agree with The Holy Bible's scriptures about the sinfulness of saying the Lord's name in vein. How do I order a new edition of such book, from which have been deleted any and all expressions of the Lord's name in vein?

Just another day at ye olden Biz. The book in question is a "how to" guide, by a TV expert in sex, and, as indicated, it's about male/anal sex. (There's a version for women, as well).

Yuppperdoodle. Stuff like this makes me unable to wait to get up and tackle the day.

Hitch

Did you happen to notice the homonym error in the email?
It was the first thing that caught my eye.

[badgoodDeb]

Originally Posted by Cinisajoy

Did you happen to notice the homonym error in the email?
It was the first thing that caught my eye.

Yup. Reading such drivel made me want to open my own veins ....

edit: Hitch, condolences on having to read that stuff.

[Hitch]

I know. It's AH-mazing.

I have to confess, I was about 99% sure it was a send-up, but the sender appears to be a real-live person.

Cin: homonym error hard to miss. As Badgood said...makes you want to take the Roman way out.

Onward and upward. I have an entire series of discussions with another client that I would LOVE to post, but...client. I think that crosses a line...unfortunately. I swear, I'm speaking English, and he's speaking Jupiterian. Or...Ganymedian. Or something.

But for the life of me, I cannot figure out if he wants the *&%$#@! embedded links that he has, in his ms, to his PRIMARY RESEARCH RESOURCE (yes! yes, you guessed it--WIKIPEDIA!) displayed as embedded links, or not. You'd think that would be a simple yes/no question, right? Oh, HELLS NO!



Hitch

[Freeshadow]

Originally Posted by badgoodDeb

Yup. Reading such drivel made me want to open my own veins ....

Good idea. Wrong veins.

Originally Posted by Frank Lloyd

I'm all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let's start with typewriters.

[Katsunami]

Last year I finished a few old games:

Star Trek: 25th Anniversary (1993, CD Version)
Star Trek: Judgment Rites (1994)
Star Trek: A Final Unity (1995)

Now I can add Phantasmagoria (1995) to that. Just finished it. Epic game with a few flaws.

It's not always logical what you have to do, and I noticed that I had to click the Hintkeeper in the same spots as 20 years ago.

Spoiler:

1. I explored the entire house and the premises and didn't know where to go next. The Hint Keeper said: "Someone in town holds the keys." Turns out that when you click in a few specific directions when outside, you turn in such a way that a car is visible. You only see it when faced one particular way though. Basically, every time you get stuck at the house, someone in town will know something.

2. At another point, I looked over the entire house to find a long object, such as a straightened paperclip to push a key out of a lock. Couldn't find it. Hint Keeper: "In the hayloft, there is something you need." Turns out that after a specific sequence in the hayloft, you have to go BACK UP THERE, look into a hole in the floorboards, and pry a nail from one of the undersides of the boards. That is just convoluted.

3. Final climactic chase. You have to grab a book from a table, but you can only do so at one particular point in time in that room. You need to be out within X amount of seconds, or you get killed. (I missed the 'grab point'; tried too early, and the character left without the book.) You run through the entire chase, and at the end it turns out you can't win the game. When you retry, you start in that room again, without any other option apart from grabbing that book, and the entire chase is omitted, because you already made all the right decisions. You immediately jump to the point where flaw 4 comes in.

4. You always get captured during the chase. There is only one way to escape, and you have to have a certain item in your inventory to do it; if you don't, you die. You can only pick that item up during the chase, but to do so, the character has to stop and search some discarded clothing. *NOBODY* would be thinking about searching some clothing for an unkown item you don't yet know you will need, if a demon-posessed maniac is chasing you.

While points 1 and 2 are just a bit 'meh' and can be remedied by clicking the Hint Keeper, point 3 and 4 detract from the epicness of the game ending; especially point 3. The game should not let you start the chase sequence if you don't have the book, because you CAN'T win.

Grabbing the book and having the item are so essential to winning the game, that the character should grab the book just before leaving the room, even if you missed your 'grab point,' to make sure the lame 'solution' in point 3 doesn't have to occur. The item from point 4 should be in plain sight. It's introduced in the first five minutes of the story, and then never hinted at again. Seeing it again in plain sight would make people realize that they need it.

Well, another game to shelve, although the ending was spoiled a bit by having to mess around with it.

Next will be the Caesar 3 campaign (1997), Baldur's Gate 1 (1998), Icewind Dale (2000), Return to Castle Wolfenstein (2001), and Jade Empire (2007), because I have a game in progress with all of them, some over 50% done (and years old...).

Or maybe I'll do Planescape: Torment first, because it's relatively short, and VERY hard to keep running on modern systems.

[Katsunami]

More on the Phantasmagoria chase scene after watching a playthrough on youtube... I finally pieced together how it works.

Spoiler:

a. There's a way to get the item mentioned in point 4 above, before starting the chase. If you happen to ALSO get a hold of the book, there isn't a chase at all. You jump straight to the end where you get captured, so you can use the item to get free again.

b. If you happen to grab the item before or during the chase but miss the book, the chase commences, but you will always end up dead. When restarting, you're in the room where the book is, and the only thing you can do is to grab the book or die on the spot; if you get a hold of it, the sequence continues as in A.

c. The only way to experience the entire ending as it was intended, is to NOT get the item from point 4 before the chase, but make sure you CAN get the book (somehow... frantically clicking). Then the chase commences, you find the item, get captured, free yourself, kill the antagonist, and then play the final scene.

Now I can put this (controversial) classic to rest for good


Also, I seem to have lost my mojo for city builders. I've been doing Caesar 3, but it just seems I'm too good at it. I know the exact sequence of events needed to obtain a never ending stream of money (exports, taxes), and what is required to build up housing and industry.

Building a city to meet the campaign requirements is not a challenge for me; it just takes a lot of time.

I've bought some Caesar 3 successors at Gog.com (Zeus, Pharaoh, expansions), and other city builders releaed in the last 20 years, but I think I'm not going to even download them again.

I'm thinking of wiping them off my drive and even ask gog.com to remove them from my library, along with all the other games I've bought at 50-90% sales of which I thought 'might be interesting someday,' such as a Dungeons and Dragons RTS.

I think I'm only going to leave the games I'm 100% sure to play, either because I want to play them (Infinity Engine games, Neverwinter Nights, Dragon Age...), or because I think they're interesting; dark stuff in the vein (ha!) of Phantasmagoria, such as Scratches (2007) and Sanitarium (1998). And some outliers I've enjoyed in the past, such as Return to Castle Wolfenstein.

Yes, I think that this is what I'll be doing; after cleaning out my paper books, music, software, physical stuff as much as possible, I'm going to also clean the game backlog to contain only the ones I'm definitely going to play.

I don't mind that I've paid €1 to €5 for the games I'm going to have removed, because I love gog.com's drm-free serivce: "You buy it, you own it. Do with it whatever you want, but please don't upload the games to be pirated. Thanks." They patch games up to the latest version. Also, they patch the games in such a way that they run on modern computers (if old games), already integrating community fixes, and even build DOSBOX around DOS games if needed. It takes hours and hours of internet scouring, patch searching, and fixing/config hacking out of your hands.

I love that. After I removed the games, they'll have maybe €25 extra or so. I don't mind that. I want them to stay in business. If a game doesn't appear on GOG.com, I don't buy it. I don't have any steam games except for the four I got to choose for free.

[DMcCunney]

Originally Posted by Hitch

But for the life of me, I cannot figure out if he wants the *&%$#@! embedded links that he has, in his ms, to his PRIMARY RESEARCH RESOURCE (yes! yes, you guessed it--WIKIPEDIA!) displayed as embedded links, or not.

Wikipedia as Primary Research Resource is an automatic fail here.

A few years back, I attended a panel on writing at the New York Comic Con, and panelist Tamora Pierce, bestselling YA noveleist said "By all means look at Wikipedia, but it should not be the only thing you look at." She was spot on.

I'll point people at Wikipedia articles where I have enough subject knowledge to consider them accurate. Subjects with independently verifiable facts and figures are reasonably safe. Anything subject like politics and religion goes downhill fast, unless you are amused by watching partisans deface each other's posts.

And I'll avoid the company of anyone who thinks Wikipedia is the sworn on gospel. (Sworn at would be a better descriptor.)
______
Dennis

[Hitch]

Originally Posted by DMcCunney

Wikipedia as Primary Research Resource is an automatic fail here.

Yes, of course it is. But we continue to have serious technical issues with this person. I don't know if it's a second-language issue (but purportedly, he's an upper-level Harvard grad...so...???), or what, but it's like sending a message out into space, and what comes back seems utterly unrelated to what you've sent. Beyond even non-sequiturs. I mean..here's an example. We send out instructions that tell clients to a) click the blue FILE NAMES below my sig, and download them, and b) to click a link for Dropbox, and to download the files that they see there. What did I get, today?

Spoiler:

I have the File on the Local Disk C, files, Dropbox, as:
"Get started with Dropbox,PDF Archive 885 KB"
Clicking on them direct me only to TV and Multimedea. I cannot get it in anyone of them.
The Dropbox shows me only the relevant files; it cannot open the main File.
Do you have any suggestions?

What? What?

A few years back, I attended a panel on writing at the New York Comic Con, and panelist Tamora Pierce, bestselling YA noveleist said "By all means look at Wikipedia, but it should not be the only thing you look at." She was spot on.

I'll point people at Wikipedia articles where I have enough subject knowledge to consider them accurate. Subjects with independently verifiable facts and figures are reasonably safe. Anything subject like politics and religion goes downhill fast, unless you are amused by watching partisans deface each other's posts.

And I'll avoid the company of anyone who thinks Wikipedia is the sworn on gospel. (Sworn at would be a better descriptor.)
______
Dennis

Anyone who thinks that Wikipedia has value, beyond VERY simple things, like, "How many episodes are in show X?," deserves what they get. But the inability to communicate is just driving me ape***.

We had a similar problem with the FIRST batch of files we asked him to DL. Again, three docx and two PDFs. I just do NOT know what to do. I've used images, arrows...the last time this happened, I received a lecture from him on why "people who make instructions suck at it," basically.

I suspect I should have sent him on down the road, and I want to kick myself for it.


Hitch

[DMcCunney]

Originally Posted by Hitch

Yes, of course it is. But we continue to have serious technical issues with this person. I don't know if it's a second-language issue (but purportedly, he's an upper-level Harvard grad...so...???), or what, but it's like sending a message out into space, and what comes back seems utterly unrelated to what you've sent. Beyond even non-sequiturs.

Years ago, I knew a woman who was maddening. Every sentence out of her mouth was a complete and total non-sequitur to the one that came before. After a while I figured out that if you listened long enough and could keep the threads straight, she eventually circled around and completed all of the thoughts, but it made communication interesting.

I mean..here's an example. We send out instructions that tell clients to a) click the blue FILE NAMES below my sig, and download them, and b) to click a link for Dropbox, and to download the files that they see there. What did I get, today?

<...>

What? What?

Been there. Seen that. Tech support was once us. I got adept at simplifying stuff to the "Press this key" level.

For what you encountered, I'd see about having the relevant stuff online so you could simply provide a link he could open in his browser and read online.

(I'd take the assertions of high-level Harvard grad with a large sack of salt.)

Anyone who thinks that Wikipedia has value, beyond VERY simple things, like, "How many episodes are in show X?," deserves what they get.

Wikipedia has value as a starting point, not an end. (My SO commissioned a button from a calligrapher acquaintance for me blazoned "Ohhh! Shiny facts!" after watching me chase down various Wikipedia ratholes for several hours as one thing led to another.)

But the problem with Wikipedia is what you mean by authoritative. When you have a crowd sourced encyclopedia, when anyone can create and edit entries, what confidence do you have that any of it is correct and factual? Not enough...

Places like Encyclopedia Britannica have filter mechanisms called editors and fact checkers who do their best to insure what they publish is authoritative, and truth or falsehood in not a matter of majority opinion.

But the inability to communicate is just driving me ape***.

We had a similar problem with the FIRST batch of files we asked him to DL. Again, three docx and two PDFs. I just do NOT know what to do. I've used images, arrows...the last time this happened, I received a lecture from him on why "people who make instructions suck at it," basically.

See above about putting stuff online and providing URLs to it. Asking them do download and read is asking for trouble.

I suspect I should have sent him on down the road, and I want to kick myself for it.

You may still have to. Since he can't seem to follow simple instructions, or comprehend what he reads, I don't see a viable long term relationship here.

(Incidentally, out of curiosity, what's the topic of his primary source Wikipedia tome?)
______
Dennis

So living in an area of the US where winters are long and snow and ice is constantly something to think about when getting around on foot I'm constantly on the look out for shoes or boots that minimize slipping yer are wearable everywhere, indoors and out. So this recent segment on Science Friday definitely caught my attention:

Not All Soles Are Created Equal


A search for outdoor gear makers resulted in my finding this product:

GLACIER ICE WATERPROOF INSULATED CARBONMAX 8" BOOT


It includes the "Arctic Grip" technology mentioned in the Science Friday broadcast.

The promotional 20% of offer was an added inducement.

I'll post in the future about my experience with these boots. I hope that it will be no more falling on my ass.

[Glorfindel]

That was the happiest rant I've ever read

(Those boots look really interesting....might have to get some. Let me know how you like them )

[Freeshadow]

Originally Posted by Glorfindel

That was the happiest rant I've ever read
... Let me know how you like them

If he does he'll post a YouTube link to "these boots are made for walking"

[Hitch]

AAAGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH.

A different client:

Wdnesday, 12/14: "I can not download the print version on Bilty. another suggestion?"

(I respond, saying..."What? I don't understand..."

Today, 12/16: "Can not download the pdf from Bilty. It says it is too short. Can you send it another way??"


WHAT? WHAT? WHAT THE BLANKETY-BLANK-BLANK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU THAT I DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT THE FRACK YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT?

I've already said, if she's talking about Bit.ly, it makes NO sense, because files are not loaded, or downloaded, from there. Does she write back, on Wednesday, and say what it is, she's talking about? Nooooooooooooooooo. Nope, I just get today's billet-doux.

For the love of heaven....please, please, please, Winter break. Get here before I do....

[Hitch]

Originally Posted by DMcCunney

For what you encountered, I'd see about having the relevant stuff online so you could simply provide a link he could open in his browser and read online.

I DO. I DO HAVE THEM ONLINE. Do they get read? Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooo.

(I'd take the assertions of high-level Harvard grad with a large sack of salt.)

Brother, you speak to the choir here. I do not believe that one iota. How can you do that, if you cannot communicate? How was his Masters achieved? In sign language?

Wikipedia has value as a starting point, not an end. (My SO commissioned a button from a calligrapher acquaintance for me blazoned "Ohhh! Shiny facts!" after watching me chase down various Wikipedia ratholes for several hours as one thing led to another.)

<snip>

See above about putting stuff online and providing URLs to it. Asking them do download and read is asking for trouble.

I do that. We have GOBS of stuff online. I even have (I loathe admitting this), little CARTOON VIDEOS of things, saying, "go here, see that, click this..."

You may still have to. Since he can't seem to follow simple instructions, or comprehend what he reads, I don't see a viable long term relationship here.

(Incidentally, out of curiosity, what's the topic of his primary source Wikipedia tome?)
______
Dennis

On the long-term...I agree. But we've made his books, and I need to make sure that he's reasonably content. I'm sure that his communication skills would become markedly better if he decided to complain to Paypal or his credit card company. Can't risk that.

The Topic? The one that you won't FIND in Wikipedia?

Spoiler:

Biotronium. Go ahead, ask. I have NO bloody idea.

I just make the damn books, mon.

Hitch