Silliness Add/Read a good joke to lighten your day - Page 171

kennyc · 03-09-2011, 02:26 PM

My thought too bob...

orlok · 03-09-2011, 02:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kennyc

isn't there an H missing? 370HSSV-0773H

Yes. I tried it with a 4, and it didn't work (I was thinking numbers only, like on a calculator)

WillieMcIntyre · 03-09-2011, 04:57 PM

Book recommendation: The History of Glue Making.

I couldn't put it down.

Bilbo1967 · 03-09-2011, 05:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WillieMcIntyre

Book recommendation: The History of Glue Making.

I couldn't put it down.

On the other hand, I just couldn't get into A History of Impregnable Fortresses.

pilotbob · 03-09-2011, 09:08 PM

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity - it's impossible to put down.

BOb

pilotbob · 03-09-2011, 09:08 PM

I'm reading a book about gravity... it's really heavy.

BOb

kennyc · 03-09-2011, 09:12 PM

I'm reading MR ... it's a groaner!

kennyc · 03-09-2011, 09:13 PM

I'm trying to read "The Unbearable Lightness of Being" but it keeps floating away.

wannabee · 03-10-2011, 01:02 AM

I'm reading "Under the Bleachers" by Seymour Butts
"Twenty yards to the Out House" by Willie Makit and illustrated by Betty Wont
"The Complete Proctologist's Handbook" by Ben Dover
"The extra trousers" by Justin Case
"Why Should I Walk?" by Iona Carr

Nexutix · 03-10-2011, 02:47 AM

A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day.
The Russian said: "We were the first in space."
The American said: "So, we were the first on the Moon."
The Blonde said:
"So what, we're going to be the first to land on the sun."
The Russian and American looked at each other and shook
their heads.
"You can't land on the sun, you'll burn up!" said the Russian.
The Blonde replied:

"We're not stupid you know.
We're going to land at night."

Nexutix · 03-10-2011, 02:51 AM

In a crowded city at a crowded bus stop, a beautiful young woman was
waiting for the bus. She was decked out in a tight leather miniskirt
with matching tight leather boots and jacket. As the bus rolled up and
it became her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too
tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of the first step on the
bus.

Slightly embarrassed and with a quick smile to the bus driver she
reached behind her and unzipped her skirt a little thinking that this
would give her enough slack to raise her leg. Again she tried to make
the step onto the bus only to discover she still couldn't!

So, a little more embarrassed she once again reached behind her and
unzipped her skirt a little more and for a second time could not get her
leg up because of the tight skirt.

So, with a coy little smile to the driver she again unzipped the
offending skirt to give a little more slack and again was unable to make
the step.

About this time the big Texan that was behind her in line picked her up
easily from the waist and placed her lightly on the step of the bus.

Well, she went ballistic and turned on the would-be hero, screeching at
him, "How dare you touch my body!! I don't even know who you are!"

At this the Texan drawled, "Well ma'am normally I would agree with you,
but after you unzipped my fly three times, I kinda figured that we were
friends.

orlok · 03-10-2011, 04:13 AM

NASA was interviewing professionals they were thinking of sending to Mars. The touchy part was that only one guy could go and it would be a one-way trip, the guy not ever returning to Earth.

The interviewer asked the first applicant, an engineer, how much he wanted to be paid for going. "One million dollars," the engineer answered. "And I want to donate it all to my alma mater--Rice University."

The next applicant was a doctor, and the interviewer asked him the same question. "Two millions dollars," the doctor said. "I want to give a million to my family and leave the other million for the advancement of medical research."

The last applicant was a lawyer. When asked how much money he wanted, he whispered in the interviewer's ear, "Three million dollars."

"Why so much more than the others?" the interviewer asked. The lawyer replied, "You give me three million, I'll give you one million, I'll keep a million, and we'll send the engineer!"

pdurrant · 03-10-2011, 04:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wannabee

"The extra trousers" by Justin Case

Sluggy Freelance....... Is it not nifty?

Hamlet53 · 03-10-2011, 08:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by patilsaurabhr

A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day.
The Russian said: "We were the first in space."
The American said: "So, we were the first on the Moon."
The Blonde said:
"So what, we're going to be the first to land on the sun."
The Russian and American looked at each other and shook
their heads.
"You can't land on the sun, you'll burn up!" said the Russian.
The Blonde replied:

"We're not stupid you know.
We're going to land at night."

Your joke made me think of this serious proposal.

One way ticket to Mars

Nexutix · 03-10-2011, 09:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hamlet53

Your joke made me think of this serious proposal.

One way ticket to Mars

That is amazing concept!

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03-09-2011, 02:26 PM	#2551
kennyc The Dank Side of the Moon Posts: 35,918 Karma: 119747553 Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Denver, CO Device: Kindle2; Kindle Fire	My thought too bob...

03-09-2011, 04:57 PM	#2553
WillieMcIntyre Enthusiast Posts: 28 Karma: 30000 Join Date: Mar 2011 Location: Scotland Device: Kindle	Book recommendation: The History of Glue Making. I couldn't put it down.

03-09-2011, 09:08 PM	#2555
pilotbob Grand Sorcerer Posts: 19,832 Karma: 11844413 Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Tampa, FL USA Device: Kindle Touch	I'm reading a book about anti-gravity - it's impossible to put down. BOb

03-09-2011, 09:08 PM	#2556
pilotbob Grand Sorcerer Posts: 19,832 Karma: 11844413 Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Tampa, FL USA Device: Kindle Touch	I'm reading a book about gravity... it's really heavy. BOb

03-09-2011, 09:12 PM	#2557
kennyc The Dank Side of the Moon Posts: 35,918 Karma: 119747553 Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Denver, CO Device: Kindle2; Kindle Fire	I'm reading MR ... it's a groaner!

03-09-2011, 09:13 PM	#2558
kennyc The Dank Side of the Moon Posts: 35,918 Karma: 119747553 Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Denver, CO Device: Kindle2; Kindle Fire	I'm trying to read "The Unbearable Lightness of Being" but it keeps floating away.

03-10-2011, 01:02 AM	#2559
wannabee Media Bloke Posts: 2,382 Karma: 113956855 Join Date: Sep 2010 Location: NSW - Australia Device: iOS	I'm reading "Under the Bleachers" by Seymour Butts "Twenty yards to the Out House" by Willie Makit and illustrated by Betty Wont "The Complete Proctologist's Handbook" by Ben Dover "The extra trousers" by Justin Case "Why Should I Walk?" by Iona Carr

03-10-2011, 02:47 AM	#2560
Nexutix Reading and reading Posts: 582 Karma: 8250144 Join Date: Oct 2010 Device: Infibeam Pi, iPod Touch 4G, iPad Air 2, iPad mini 2, Oneplus One	A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day. The Russian said: "We were the first in space." The American said: "So, we were the first on the Moon." The Blonde said: "So what, we're going to be the first to land on the sun." The Russian and American looked at each other and shook their heads. "You can't land on the sun, you'll burn up!" said the Russian. The Blonde replied: "We're not stupid you know. We're going to land at night."

03-10-2011, 02:51 AM	#2561
Nexutix Reading and reading Posts: 582 Karma: 8250144 Join Date: Oct 2010 Device: Infibeam Pi, iPod Touch 4G, iPad Air 2, iPad mini 2, Oneplus One	In a crowded city at a crowded bus stop, a beautiful young woman was waiting for the bus. She was decked out in a tight leather miniskirt with matching tight leather boots and jacket. As the bus rolled up and it became her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of the first step on the bus. Slightly embarrassed and with a quick smile to the bus driver she reached behind her and unzipped her skirt a little thinking that this would give her enough slack to raise her leg. Again she tried to make the step onto the bus only to discover she still couldn't! So, a little more embarrassed she once again reached behind her and unzipped her skirt a little more and for a second time could not get her leg up because of the tight skirt. So, with a coy little smile to the driver she again unzipped the offending skirt to give a little more slack and again was unable to make the step. About this time the big Texan that was behind her in line picked her up easily from the waist and placed her lightly on the step of the bus. Well, she went ballistic and turned on the would-be hero, screeching at him, "How dare you touch my body!! I don't even know who you are!" At this the Texan drawled, "Well ma'am normally I would agree with you, but after you unzipped my fly three times, I kinda figured that we were friends.

03-10-2011, 04:13 AM	#2562
orlok Close to the Edit! Posts: 9,797 Karma: 267994408 Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: UK Device: Kindle Oasis, Amazon Fire 8", Kindle 6"	NASA was interviewing professionals they were thinking of sending to Mars. The touchy part was that only one guy could go and it would be a one-way trip, the guy not ever returning to Earth. The interviewer asked the first applicant, an engineer, how much he wanted to be paid for going. "One million dollars," the engineer answered. "And I want to donate it all to my alma mater--Rice University." The next applicant was a doctor, and the interviewer asked him the same question. "Two millions dollars," the doctor said. "I want to give a million to my family and leave the other million for the advancement of medical research." The last applicant was a lawyer. When asked how much money he wanted, he whispered in the interviewer's ear, "Three million dollars." "Why so much more than the others?" the interviewer asked. The lawyer replied, "You give me three million, I'll give you one million, I'll keep a million, and we'll send the engineer!"