Harv and Vera's Mexico Vacation - Page 11

psockpuppet · 01-21-2009, 09:47 PM

The Goose taxied out into Lake Gatun. Soon, the roar of engines on take-off filled the air and she was airborne. Under the flight path, two socks sat on chaise longues, basking in the tropical sun. One was leafing through a knitting magazine. The other was woriedly paging through a stapled document.

"Hugo?"

"Yeah, Lefty?"

"I think we were supposed to be on that plane."

"Why do you say that?"

"Well, I've been leafing through the script -- to see if that set of suspenders got the part I recommended for her -- and right here in twelve pages, it says, 'Cut to interior of Goose. Harv looks down at the flaps lever, startled. HARV> Where the Hell did those socks come from? The socks wave back silently and shuffle off to the rear, where Biggles soon starts screaming.'"

"Let me see that!" Hugo grabbed the script, looking at the opened page.

"Oh, snap! First this author gets high on hallucinogens, and now he's hung over!"

"Well, Hugo, he may be hung under. I mean, Adrian was visiting his cubicle last night."

"Now what do we do?"

The small blue frog, who had been following them around for the past week, pulled out his cell and started dialing.

pshrynk · 01-21-2009, 10:14 PM

In Mexico City, two small brown dogs wandered aimlessly through the streets. Every now and then, they would sniff vigorously at a pile of dirt or a fencepost.

"Hey, George! I hear that there is something really big happening at the Taxi Stand! Want to go and watch?"

"Naw, Bob. We have to patrol this sector. The Friend would have our hides if we went off and had fun, instead."

"I wonder what happened to that guy who hijacked the taxi last night."

George stopped and seriously investigated a light post. nodding his approval, he deposited his reply to the witty commentary posted there. "That pshrynk and his stories! Hah! Who would ever believe that an African American would be elected President!

"I heard that he was taken to see Main Guy. The Friend was there, too, but he hid in the shadows."

"Really, George? I wish I could be there some time, just to see what goes on!"

"What are you? A cat? What's with the curiosity? We're chihuahuas! We prance around, looking cute and adorable, dance in stupid little skirts in the square, and get totally viscious when the time comes! Enough with these questions!"

Just up the street, in the shadows of a tumble down buidling, a lurking form grunted aprreciatively and backed out through the door.

Nate the great · 01-21-2009, 10:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by psockpuppet

"Well, Hugo, he may be hung under. I mean, Adrian was visiting his cubicle last night."

zelda_pinwheel · 01-22-2009, 09:30 AM

a small blue frog ! what could he be up to ?? will hugo and lefty manage to get on that plane after all ? (probably, but only with the help of some sort of pan-dimensional creature...) who are Main Guy and The Friend ?? and is that "r" superfluous ? will the author recover his wits, or has he had one too many Zany Carter Deluxes / absinthes ? tune in next time for the stunning answers to these questions ! (or possibly just more tension-building cliff-hangers, depending.) same bat-time, same bat-channel !!

GeoffC · 01-22-2009, 11:53 AM

hang on, author? authors!

pshrynk · 01-22-2009, 04:03 PM

The taxi pulled up in front of the non-descript cantina. The rear seat occupant stepped out and walked in. He walked up to the bar as if he owned the place.

""What do you want, gringo?" asked the bartender.

"I have an appointment with your boss," came the answer.

"I don't see any appointments on the calendar."

The man in the riding cape turned to look at the calendar on the wall. Whipping his hand into his pocket quick as a snake, he pulled his revolver, cocked, and shot a hole in the dead center of the day's date. Turning like a flash, he struck the bat from the hand of the bartender and said, "I believe there is one, now."

The phone beside the register rang. "Go ahead and pick it up. Slowly."

Eyes crossedat the .38 snub nose that hovered a mere inch from his nose, the bartender picked up the phone, listened, and said, "You're to go right in."

The stranger walked to the back of the cantina and entered the small curtained room. Inside it was dimly lit.

"So, let's start out with introductions. Or rather, introduction. Who the hell are you?" came the voice from the shadows.

zelda_pinwheel · 01-22-2009, 04:05 PM

that's how i like to make my appointments too.

it sounds like we may soon find out a bit more about these mysterious new characters ! i can't wait...

DixieGal · 01-22-2009, 05:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by zelda_pinwheel

that's how i like to make my appointments too.

it sounds like we may soon find out a bit more about these mysterious new characters ! i can't wait...

Since Psockpuppet is co-authoring this thing, I don't think we will be finding out more about the new characters anytime soon. Make that "finding out the truth..." That walking eclair of a rat does not specialize in clarity. It specializes in kidnapping and confusion.

pshrynk · 01-22-2009, 06:26 PM

The stranger struck what could only be described as "a pose" and exclaimed, "I, my dear fellows am Hank, Comte de Bois Aussi. Gentleman adventurer, French patriot, and Cultural Attache to the Swahili Nation."

A moment of silence ensued, in which, if the light were better, the figure in the back of the room might have been seen moving its lips. "So, you're a spy for France and the Swahilis?"

"Hey, there's a Depression going on! One does what one must."

"So, what are you doing here, Senor le Compte?"

"I have an urgent message for le Grand Taxi -- the Taxi Boss!"

"You want to give the Taxi Boss a massage?"

"Non! Not a massage! A message! Don't let the ridicuous French accent fool you!"

"Well, go ahead and leave the message and I'll be sure to get it to this Taxi Boss if I ever have the opportunity."

"I happen to know that you are the Taxi Boss, the secret ruler of all Mexico. And I shall prove it!" Bois Aussi said a name.

A low growling came from near the floor. "That is not a name that is said anywhere in public by men who wish to live, senor!"

"Nonetheless, I have said it. It proves that I know whereof I speak!"

"Very well, you have shown that you know who I am. What is this urgent message?"

"Mexico is about to be embroiled in a fight with les Etats Unis, the US! There will be an incident in the Sea of Cortez, which will destroy the United States Pacific Fleet and Mexico shall be blamed."

"And... who exactly is going to do this?"

"Nazi Germany! With the US embroiled in a war with its southern neighbor, they will have a free hand to do as they wish in Africa. Including some very important mineral rights in the middle of Swahili Territory."

The Taxi Boss turned to the smaller figure near the floor. "We need to get this message to The Factor and the American Woman right away!"

zelda_pinwheel · 01-22-2009, 06:45 PM

will those dastardly villains stop at nothing ? my god ! the tension is almost unbearable !

nekokami · 01-22-2009, 09:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pshrynk

The man in the riding cape turned to look at the calendar on the wall. Whipping his hand into his pocket quick as a snake, he pulled his revolver, cocked, and shot a hole in the dead center of the day's date. Turning like a flash, he struck the bat from the hand of the bartender and said, "I believe there is one, now."

Now that's a man of action.

I do hope none of my coworkers are reading this....

pshrynk · 01-23-2009, 05:26 PM

Frau Miyatake entered the building. She glared at the doorkeeper, who turned pale and completely forgot to ask for the counter signs.

"We have a problem! Numerous problems!" she exclaimed as she walked into the meeting room.

"Start with the least important. I'm not feeling particularly energetic today," replied the man sitting at the table.

"Harv Wallbanger is flying up from Panama City with Lietentant Colonel Biggles. He should arrive within the day."

"And he is a problem, how?"

Hilda teared up briefly. "He was the one who got my husband recalled in disgrace to Japan. He may look stupid, but he has skills that we are not yet aware of."

"And this Biggles?"

"A mindless drone from the US Army in the Canal Zone. Stealing peoples' lunches is his most clever action."

"Is this Wallbanger of any use to us alive?"

"He is connected to the American Woman. They have -- an understanding."

"Have him brought in. Biggles, too, if he doesn't put up a fight."

"I want his dog, too. My children seem to like him."

"Whatever. Anything else?"

"The Taxi Boss seems to have heard about the plot for the Pacific Fleet. He was visited by an agent of either the French or the Watusi Nation. We are not sure."

"France or Watusi Nation?"

"Apparently there is a Depression going on and he free-lances."

The man at the table sighed. He was tired. He had risen through the ranks of the German Foreign Service by the expediency of assasination, trickery, and the occasional sharply worded memo and just wanted to retire some place warm and most importantly, free of Nazis. If he could manage to pull off the destruction of the US Pacific Fleet and get Mexico blamed for it, the name of Heinz von Schlepwig would surely go down in the whispered annals of spying as the master of all subterfuge.

"Have them all killed. Report back with your success."

Outside the window, where there was posted a cute little story about a private eye looking for golden fecal matter, two small, brown dogs listened intently.

zelda_pinwheel · 01-23-2009, 05:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pshrynk

the whispered annals of spying

...they have to whisper them. it's in the "How To Be A Master of Subterfuge in Ten Easy Lessons" mail-order handbook.

montsnmags · 01-23-2009, 06:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pshrynk

...the whispered annals of spying
...

In the whispered annals of spying, the code phrase is "pull my finger".

Cheers,
Marc

badgoodDeb · 01-23-2009, 06:38 PM

But the question is -- is Heinz von Schlepwig *his* name, or somebody else's??

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01-21-2009, 09:47 PM	#151
psockpuppet Lefty, Hugo, and me! Posts: 104 Karma: 29030 Join Date: Aug 2008 Device: Guttenberg Bible	The Goose taxied out into Lake Gatun. Soon, the roar of engines on take-off filled the air and she was airborne. Under the flight path, two socks sat on chaise longues, basking in the tropical sun. One was leafing through a knitting magazine. The other was woriedly paging through a stapled document. "Hugo?" "Yeah, Lefty?" "I think we were supposed to be on that plane." "Why do you say that?" "Well, I've been leafing through the script -- to see if that set of suspenders got the part I recommended for her -- and right here in twelve pages, it says, 'Cut to interior of Goose. Harv looks down at the flaps lever, startled. HARV> Where the Hell did those socks come from? The socks wave back silently and shuffle off to the rear, where Biggles soon starts screaming.'" "Let me see that!" Hugo grabbed the script, looking at the opened page. "Oh, snap! First this author gets high on hallucinogens, and now he's hung over!" "Well, Hugo, he may be hung under. I mean, Adrian was visiting his cubicle last night." "Now what do we do?" The small blue frog, who had been following them around for the past week, pulled out his cell and started dialing.

01-21-2009, 10:14 PM	#152
pshrynk Beepbeep n beebeep, yeah! Posts: 11,726 Karma: 8255450 Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: La Crosse, Wisconsin, aka America's IceBox Device: iThingie, KmkII, I miss Zelda!	In Mexico City, two small brown dogs wandered aimlessly through the streets. Every now and then, they would sniff vigorously at a pile of dirt or a fencepost. "Hey, George! I hear that there is something really big happening at the Taxi Stand! Want to go and watch?" "Naw, Bob. We have to patrol this sector. The Friend would have our hides if we went off and had fun, instead." "I wonder what happened to that guy who hijacked the taxi last night." George stopped and seriously investigated a light post. nodding his approval, he deposited his reply to the witty commentary posted there. "That pshrynk and his stories! Hah! Who would ever believe that an African American would be elected President! "I heard that he was taken to see Main Guy. The Friend was there, too, but he hid in the shadows." "Really, George? I wish I could be there some time, just to see what goes on!" "What are you? A cat? What's with the curiosity? We're chihuahuas! We prance around, looking cute and adorable, dance in stupid little skirts in the square, and get totally viscious when the time comes! Enough with these questions!" Just up the street, in the shadows of a tumble down buidling, a lurking form grunted aprreciatively and backed out through the door.

01-22-2009, 09:30 AM	#154
zelda_pinwheel zeldinha zippy zeldissima Posts: 27,827 Karma: 921169 Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Paris, France Device: eb1150 & is that a nook in her pocket, or she just happy to see you?	a small blue frog ! what could he be up to ?? will hugo and lefty manage to get on that plane after all ? (probably, but only with the help of some sort of pan-dimensional creature...) who are Main Guy and The Friend ?? and is that "r" superfluous ? will the author recover his wits, or has he had one too many Zany Carter Deluxes / absinthes ? tune in next time for the stunning answers to these questions ! (or possibly just more tension-building cliff-hangers, depending.) same bat-time, same bat-channel !!

01-22-2009, 11:53 AM	#155
GeoffC Chocolate Grasshopper ... Posts: 27,599 Karma: 20821184 Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Scotland Device: Muse HD , Cybook Gen3 , Pocketbook 302 (Black) , Nexus 10: wife has PW	hang on, author? authors!

01-22-2009, 04:03 PM	#156
pshrynk Beepbeep n beebeep, yeah! Posts: 11,726 Karma: 8255450 Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: La Crosse, Wisconsin, aka America's IceBox Device: iThingie, KmkII, I miss Zelda!	The taxi pulled up in front of the non-descript cantina. The rear seat occupant stepped out and walked in. He walked up to the bar as if he owned the place. ""What do you want, gringo?" asked the bartender. "I have an appointment with your boss," came the answer. "I don't see any appointments on the calendar." The man in the riding cape turned to look at the calendar on the wall. Whipping his hand into his pocket quick as a snake, he pulled his revolver, cocked, and shot a hole in the dead center of the day's date. Turning like a flash, he struck the bat from the hand of the bartender and said, "I believe there is one, now." The phone beside the register rang. "Go ahead and pick it up. Slowly." Eyes crossedat the .38 snub nose that hovered a mere inch from his nose, the bartender picked up the phone, listened, and said, "You're to go right in." The stranger walked to the back of the cantina and entered the small curtained room. Inside it was dimly lit. "So, let's start out with introductions. Or rather, introduction. Who the hell are you?" came the voice from the shadows.

01-22-2009, 04:05 PM	#157
zelda_pinwheel zeldinha zippy zeldissima Posts: 27,827 Karma: 921169 Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Paris, France Device: eb1150 & is that a nook in her pocket, or she just happy to see you?	that's how i like to make my appointments too. it sounds like we may soon find out a bit more about these mysterious new characters ! i can't wait...

01-22-2009, 06:26 PM	#159
pshrynk Beepbeep n beebeep, yeah! Posts: 11,726 Karma: 8255450 Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: La Crosse, Wisconsin, aka America's IceBox Device: iThingie, KmkII, I miss Zelda!	The stranger struck what could only be described as "a pose" and exclaimed, "I, my dear fellows am Hank, Comte de Bois Aussi. Gentleman adventurer, French patriot, and Cultural Attache to the Swahili Nation." A moment of silence ensued, in which, if the light were better, the figure in the back of the room might have been seen moving its lips. "So, you're a spy for France and the Swahilis?" "Hey, there's a Depression going on! One does what one must." "So, what are you doing here, Senor le Compte?" "I have an urgent message for le Grand Taxi -- the Taxi Boss!" "You want to give the Taxi Boss a massage?" "Non! Not a massage! A message! Don't let the ridicuous French accent fool you!" "Well, go ahead and leave the message and I'll be sure to get it to this Taxi Boss if I ever have the opportunity." "I happen to know that you are the Taxi Boss, the secret ruler of all Mexico. And I shall prove it!" Bois Aussi said a name. A low growling came from near the floor. "That is not a name that is said anywhere in public by men who wish to live, senor!" "Nonetheless, I have said it. It proves that I know whereof I speak!" "Very well, you have shown that you know who I am. What is this urgent message?" "Mexico is about to be embroiled in a fight with les Etats Unis, the US! There will be an incident in the Sea of Cortez, which will destroy the United States Pacific Fleet and Mexico shall be blamed." "And... who exactly is going to do this?" "Nazi Germany! With the US embroiled in a war with its southern neighbor, they will have a free hand to do as they wish in Africa. Including some very important mineral rights in the middle of Swahili Territory." The Taxi Boss turned to the smaller figure near the floor. "We need to get this message to The Factor and the American Woman right away!"

01-22-2009, 06:45 PM	#160
zelda_pinwheel zeldinha zippy zeldissima Posts: 27,827 Karma: 921169 Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Paris, France Device: eb1150 & is that a nook in her pocket, or she just happy to see you?	will those dastardly villains stop at nothing ? my god ! the tension is almost unbearable !

01-23-2009, 05:26 PM	#162
pshrynk Beepbeep n beebeep, yeah! Posts: 11,726 Karma: 8255450 Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: La Crosse, Wisconsin, aka America's IceBox Device: iThingie, KmkII, I miss Zelda!	Frau Miyatake entered the building. She glared at the doorkeeper, who turned pale and completely forgot to ask for the counter signs. "We have a problem! Numerous problems!" she exclaimed as she walked into the meeting room. "Start with the least important. I'm not feeling particularly energetic today," replied the man sitting at the table. "Harv Wallbanger is flying up from Panama City with Lietentant Colonel Biggles. He should arrive within the day." "And he is a problem, how?" Hilda teared up briefly. "He was the one who got my husband recalled in disgrace to Japan. He may look stupid, but he has skills that we are not yet aware of." "And this Biggles?" "A mindless drone from the US Army in the Canal Zone. Stealing peoples' lunches is his most clever action." "Is this Wallbanger of any use to us alive?" "He is connected to the American Woman. They have -- an understanding." "Have him brought in. Biggles, too, if he doesn't put up a fight." "I want his dog, too. My children seem to like him." "Whatever. Anything else?" "The Taxi Boss seems to have heard about the plot for the Pacific Fleet. He was visited by an agent of either the French or the Watusi Nation. We are not sure." "France or Watusi Nation?" "Apparently there is a Depression going on and he free-lances." The man at the table sighed. He was tired. He had risen through the ranks of the German Foreign Service by the expediency of assasination, trickery, and the occasional sharply worded memo and just wanted to retire some place warm and most importantly, free of Nazis. If he could manage to pull off the destruction of the US Pacific Fleet and get Mexico blamed for it, the name of Heinz von Schlepwig would surely go down in the whispered annals of spying as the master of all subterfuge. "Have them all killed. Report back with your success." Outside the window, where there was posted a cute little story about a private eye looking for golden fecal matter, two small, brown dogs listened intently.

01-23-2009, 06:38 PM	#165
badgoodDeb Grand Sorcerer Posts: 8,552 Karma: 64462893 Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Harrisburg outskirts Device: Palms, K1-4s, iPads, iPhones, KV, KO1	But the question is -- is Heinz von Schlepwig his name, or somebody else's??

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