Unutterably Silly Add/Read a good joke to lighten your day

[gollu]

well, Roger,
I find your "joke" really NOT FUNNY. Actually it sounds as some right wing brainwashing.

[kennyc]

I think it's hilarious.....different tastes and humors I guess.

[columbus]

Originally Posted by gollu

well, Roger,
I find your "joke" really NOT FUNNY. Actually it sounds as some right wing brainwashing.

It looks to me as though this joke is from a British perspective, based on the current political and immigration circumstances there.

It may well not be understood by other cultures.

I most certainly can appreciate it.

[roger the rabbit]

Originally Posted by kennyc

I think it's hilarious.....different tastes and humors I guess.

Originally Posted by columbus

It looks to me as though this joke is from a British perspective, based on the current political and immigration circumstances there.

It may well not be understood by other cultures.

I most certainly can appreciate it.

Glad you guys saw the funny side

Originally Posted by gollu

well, Roger,
I find your "joke" really NOT FUNNY. Actually it sounds as some right wing brainwashing.

Sorry you did not like it, if you had, or do spend some time in the UK you will understand it.

[BeTePoK]

How can woman destroy man's self-respect, using only four words...???
...
...

Inappropriate content deleted by moderator.

[BeTePoK]

Peculiarity of childbirth of English ladies...

Inappropriate content deleted by moderator

[BeTePoK]

Real story! Sex and Bear included!

Inappropriate content deleted. MR is a "family friendly" site; adult content is unsuitable.

Thank you for your understanding.

[Moderator]

[CraftyDan]

How can woman destroy man's self-respect, using only four words...???
...
...

Inappropriate content deleted by moderator.

The funny part to me:

It took me a minute to realize that wasn't the punchline.

[dragonbone]

Originally Posted by roger the rabbit

Glad you guys saw the funny side

haha... thanks! That was hysterical!

[pilotbob]

Not really a joke... but sort of funny...

I watch this Sitcom on TV called "TIl Death". Anyway... the main character is a school teacher.

He was in his room in one scene talking to his wife... and you know how the teacher would make you write lines on the blackboard... Like:

"I will not talk in school..."

"I will do my homework..."

Over and over. Well on the black board was written:

I will not waste chalk.
I will not waste chalk.
I will not waste chalk.
I will not waste chalk.
I will not waste chalk.
I will not waste chalk.
I will not waste chalk.
I will not waste chalk.
I will not waste chalk.
I will not waste chalk.
I will not waste chalk.
I will not waste chalk.


I wonder how many other people saw that. It has me looking for other subtle jokes in the set. Anyone else notice stuff like this on any other shows?

BOb

[happy_terd]

Originally Posted by roger the rabbit

Teaching Maths



6. Teaching Maths In 2009

A logger is arrested for trying to cut down a tree in case it may be offensive to Muslims or other religious groups not consulted in the felling licence. He is also fined a £100 as his chainsaw is in breach of Health and
Safety legislation as it deemed too dangerous and could cut something. He has used the chainsaw for over 20 years without incident however he does not have the correct certificate of competence and is therefore considered to be a recidivist and habitual criminal. His DNA is sampled and his details circulated throughout all government agencies. He protests and is taken to court and fined another £100 because he is such an easy target.

When he is released he returns t o find Gypsies have cut down half his wood to build a camp on his land. He tries to throw them off but is arrested, prosecuted for harassing an ethnic minority, imprisoned and fined a further £100. While he is in jail the Gypsies cut down the rest of his wood and sell it on the black market for £100 cash. They also have a leaving barbeque of squirrel and pheasant and depart leaving behind several tonnes of rubbish and asbestos sheeting. The forester, on release, is warned that failure to clear the fly tipped rubbish immediately at his own cost is an offence. He complains and is arrested for environmental pollution, breach of the peace and invoiced £12,000 plus VAT for safe disposal costs by a regulated waste contractor.

Your assignment: How many times is the logger going to have to be arrested and fined before he realises that he is never going to make £20 profit by hard work, give up, sign onto the dole and live off the state for the rest of his life?



7. Teaching Maths In 2010

A logger doesn’t sell a lorry load of timber because he can’t get a loan to buy a new truck because his bank has spent all his and their money on a derivative of securitised debt related to sub- prime mortgages in Alabama and lost the lot, apart from some government money left to pay a few million pounds in bonuses to their senior directors and the traders who made the biggest losses. The logger struggles to pay the £1,200 road tax on his old lorry but, as it was built in the 1970s it no longer meets the emissions regulations and he is forced to scrap it.

Some Bulgarian loggers buy the lorry from the scrap merchant and put it back on the road. They undercut everyone on price for haulage and send their cash back home, while claiming unemployment for themselves and their relatives. When questioned they claim to speak no English and it is easier to deport them at the taxpayers’ expense. Following their holiday back home they return to the UK with different names and fresh girls and start again. The logger protests, is accused of being a bigoted racist and as his name
is on the side of his old lorry he is forced to pay £1,500 registration fees as a gang master.

The Government borrows more money to pay the bankers, as bonuses are not cheap. The parliamentarians feel they are missing out and claim the difference on expenses and allowances.

You do the maths.



8. Teaching Maths 2017

أ المسجل تبيع حموله شاحنة من الخشب من اجل 100 دولار. صاحب تكلفة الانت=D 8ج من الثمن. ما هو الربح له؟ (see item 2)

LOL


(watch out man...the left tends to get angry if they catch someone making fun of them)

[Nate the great]

This was awesome:
http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&sour...9&layer=c&cbll

Look at the street view.

[montsnmags]

Originally Posted by Nate the great

This was awesome:
http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&sour...9&layer=c&cbll

Look at the street view.

They don't have water taxis there. They have underwater taxis. Theirs must be running late.

Cheers,
Marc

[Javed]

Originally Posted by Nate the great

This was awesome:
http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&sour...9&layer=c&cbll

Look at the street view.

Very funny image, Nate.

It seems they want to go swimming, but at the same time are worried the newspaper will get wet by rain and hence the umbrella. No sign of rain, the sky is very sunny. Ok, someone go sneak up behind them with a bucket of water!

[kennyc]

I must not be seeing the same thing....