how to torture a librarian

Nate the great · 10-06-2009, 09:36 PM

from xkcd

nomesque · 10-06-2009, 10:05 PM

I like. Strangely enough, when I saw the title of the thread, though, I thought it would be something along the lines of following them through the library asking, "Do you have this one in ebook format? How about this one? This one?"

ardeegee · 10-06-2009, 10:46 PM

And I was thinking that it might involve one of these:

http://www.environmentalgraffiti.com...e-devices/8850

Possibly the "street sweeper's daughter", aka "Scavenger's daughter."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scavenger%27s_daughter

And while she's pinned in it, hot needles beneath the fingernails. And while you are sticking in the needles, you kill her children in front of her, and she has to watch because you've already cut off her eyelids.

Was anyone else thinking that?

Nate the great · 10-06-2009, 11:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ardeegee

And I was thinking that it might involve one of these:

http://www.environmentalgraffiti.com...e-devices/8850

Possibly the "street sweeper's daughter", aka "Scavenger's daughter."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scavenger%27s_daughter

And while she's pinned in it, hot needles beneath the fingernails. And while you are sticking in the needles, you kill her children in front of her, and she has to watch because you've already cut off her eyelids.

Was anyone else thinking that?

I was, but I usually get bored halfway through and go do something else. I have a serious problem with unfinished projects.

pshrynk · 10-07-2009, 05:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ardeegee

And I was thinking that it might involve one of these:

http://www.environmentalgraffiti.com...e-devices/8850

Possibly the "street sweeper's daughter", aka "Scavenger's daughter."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scavenger%27s_daughter

And while she's pinned in it, hot needles beneath the fingernails. And while you are sticking in the needles, you kill her children in front of her, and she has to watch because you've already cut off her eyelids.

Was anyone else thinking that?

You've got an appointment next Friday. Don't mind the security guards at the door. They're just there for show...

fugazied · 10-07-2009, 07:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nate the great

I was, but I usually get bored halfway through and go do something else. I have a serious problem with unfinished projects.

lol!

I think the hardcover torture is far simpler.

carlobee · 10-07-2009, 11:02 PM

haha. that was niiiiice!

GeoffC · 10-08-2009, 11:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nomesque

I like. Strangely enough, when I saw the title of the thread, though, I thought it would be something along the lines of following them through the library asking, "Do you have this one in ebook format? How about this one? This one?"

me too .....

Quote:

Originally Posted by ardeegee

And I was thinking that it might involve one of these:

http://www.environmentalgraffiti.com...e-devices/8850

Possibly the "street sweeper's daughter", aka "Scavenger's daughter."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scavenger%27s_daughter

And while she's pinned in it, hot needles beneath the fingernails. And while you are sticking in the needles, you kill her children in front of her, and she has to watch because you've already cut off her eyelids.

Was anyone else thinking that?

RCR · 10-09-2009, 05:16 PM

Real ways to torture a librarian -

Lick your finger every time you turn a page.

Fold a page corner to mark your place.

Ask - "Can I have the book with the brown and blue cover that I was reading last month?"

Treat the library as a child caring facility and adventure playground for your hyperactive rugrats.

And worse -

Take books into the toilet and shove them down the toilet bowl.

Start little fires in the stacks.

Flick burning matches around the reading room.

Carry a machete into the reading room and when challenged, say "The Bible says to carry a sword."

GeoffC · 10-10-2009, 06:53 AM

.... you have toilet facilities in your libraries !!!!!! ?

HarryT · 10-10-2009, 07:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GeoffC

.... you have toilet facilities in your libraries !!!!!! ?

Some of us live in countries which have discovered the benefits of indoor plumbing, Geoff

.

GeoffC · 10-12-2009, 05:12 AM

.... Ouch ! .....

Juliette · 10-12-2009, 10:30 AM

...you can more simply ask for international lending. Wait- just about it. Or even inter-libraries lending. That usually terrifies them

Idoine · 10-12-2009, 06:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GeoffC

.... you have toilet facilities in your libraries !!!!!! ?

Quote:

Originally Posted by HarryT

Some of us live in countries which have discovered the benefits of indoor plumbing, Geoff

.

Quote:

Originally Posted by GeoffC

.... Ouch ! .....

Idoine · 10-12-2009, 06:29 PM

By the way...

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nate the great

from xkcd

10-06-2009, 09:36 PM	#1
Nate the great Sir Penguin of Edinburgh Posts: 12,375 Karma: 23555235 Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: DC Metro area Device: Shake a stick plus 1	how to torture a librarian from xkcd

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10-06-2009, 10:05 PM	#2
nomesque Snooty Bestselling Author Posts: 1,485 Karma: 1000000 Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Ipswich, QLD, Australia Device: PRS-650	I like. Strangely enough, when I saw the title of the thread, though, I thought it would be something along the lines of following them through the library asking, "Do you have this one in ebook format? How about this one? This one?"

10-06-2009, 10:46 PM	#3
ardeegee Maratus speciosus butt Posts: 3,292 Karma: 1162698 Join Date: Sep 2009 Device: PRS-350	And I was thinking that it might involve one of these: http://www.environmentalgraffiti.com...e-devices/8850 Possibly the "street sweeper's daughter", aka "Scavenger's daughter." http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scavenger%27s_daughter And while she's pinned in it, hot needles beneath the fingernails. And while you are sticking in the needles, you kill her children in front of her, and she has to watch because you've already cut off her eyelids. Was anyone else thinking that?

10-07-2009, 11:02 PM	#7
carlobee Fanatic Posts: 535 Karma: 972 Join Date: Jul 2009 Device: The new iPad	haha. that was niiiiice!

10-09-2009, 05:16 PM	#9
RCR Addict Posts: 334 Karma: 992487 Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Melbourne, Australia Device: 2 x Sony 505, iPad, Samsung 7 Tablet, ASUS Transformer, Nexus 7	Real ways to torture a librarian - Lick your finger every time you turn a page. Fold a page corner to mark your place. Ask - "Can I have the book with the brown and blue cover that I was reading last month?" Treat the library as a child caring facility and adventure playground for your hyperactive rugrats. And worse - Take books into the toilet and shove them down the toilet bowl. Start little fires in the stacks. Flick burning matches around the reading room. Carry a machete into the reading room and when challenged, say "The Bible says to carry a sword."

10-10-2009, 06:53 AM	#10
GeoffC Chocolate Grasshopper ... Posts: 27,599 Karma: 20821184 Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Scotland Device: Muse HD , Cybook Gen3 , Pocketbook 302 (Black) , Nexus 10: wife has PW	.... you have toilet facilities in your libraries !!!!!! ?

10-12-2009, 05:12 AM	#12
GeoffC Chocolate Grasshopper ... Posts: 27,599 Karma: 20821184 Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Scotland Device: Muse HD , Cybook Gen3 , Pocketbook 302 (Black) , Nexus 10: wife has PW	.... Ouch ! .....

10-12-2009, 10:30 AM	#13
Juliette I eat books Posts: 601 Karma: 5124 Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Milan, Italy Device: Gen3 PRS-505 PRS-600 PB360 PB302 K2 Opus BebookMini OnyxBoox K3 KDXG	...you can more simply ask for international lending. Wait- just about it. Or even inter-libraries lending. That usually terrifies them