Silliness Add/Read a good joke to lighten your day - Page 721

Fbone · 01-05-2020, 06:23 PM

A thief broke into my house last night. He started searching for money ...

So I woke up and searched with him!

doubleshuffle · 01-06-2020, 07:34 AM

I met a Frenchman in sandals the other day. His name was Philippe Philoppe.

drjd · 01-07-2020, 06:11 AM

I fear my neighbor may be stalking me, she was googling my name last night on her computer...

I saw it clearly through my binoculars!

Fbone · 01-07-2020, 03:26 PM

What's orange and sounds like a parrot?

A carrot.

drjd · 01-08-2020, 05:30 AM

What sort of television programmes do ducks like?

Duckumentaries.

drjd · 01-09-2020, 05:22 AM

Have you ever tried to eat a clock? It's very time consuming.

doubleshuffle · 01-09-2020, 03:06 PM

This seems to be making the social media round at the moment, and I really like it:

Shakespeare walks into a gay bar.

[Exit, pursued by a bear.]

drjd · 01-10-2020, 05:20 AM

If you see a robbery at an Apple Store.

Does that make you an iWitness?

drjd · 01-11-2020, 05:15 AM

What do you call it when you mix alcohol and American Literature?

Tequila Mockingbird.

DMcCunney · 01-11-2020, 11:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by drjd

What do you call it when you mix alcohol and American Literature?

Tequila Mockingbird.

There is one: https://www.diffordsguide.com/cockta...la-mockingbird

______
Dennis

drjd · 01-12-2020, 05:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DMcCunney

There is one: https://www.diffordsguide.com/cockta...la-mockingbird

______
Dennis

Oops!

drjd · 01-12-2020, 05:08 AM

Is it unlucky to drink on Friday the thirteenth, or is it merely stuporstition?

Adoby · 01-12-2020, 10:22 AM

There is something wrong with the crisps down at the pub.

The day after I always get a splitting headache and a dry mouth.

drjd · 01-14-2020, 01:17 PM

I was asking my friend at what point did Celsius and Fahrenheit become the same.

One of my other buddies quickly chimed in, "-40 degrees..."

Impressed I said, "I didn't know you were so knowledgeable in weather science?"

"I'm not," he said. "But I have been to Minnesota."

drjd · 01-15-2020, 06:11 AM

Seeing her friend Marcia wearing a new locket, Ashley asks if there is a memento of some sort inside.

“Yes,” says Marcia, “a lock of my husband’s hair.”

“But Larry’s still alive?”

“I know, but his hair is gone.”

Thread Tools	Search this Thread
Show Printable Version Email this Page	Search this Thread: Advanced Search

Similar Threads
Thread	Thread Starter	Forum	Replies	Last Post
Add from the Mobile Read Library?	danwdoo	Calibre	8	12-03-2014 06:03 PM
Good Day Eh!! :-)	Gedvondur	Introduce Yourself	12	07-22-2010 12:16 AM
Classic Is there a way to lighten the background?	rlsamson	Barnes & Noble NOOK	3	06-30-2010 04:56 PM
Read-in-Microsoft-Reader 1.1.3 add-in released	Alexander Turcic	Reading and Management	2	02-20-2006 03:47 AM

01-05-2020, 06:23 PM	#10801
Fbone Is that a sandwich? Posts: 8,313 Karma: 103930826 Join Date: Jun 2010 Device: Nook Glowlight Plus	A thief broke into my house last night. He started searching for money ... So I woke up and searched with him!

01-06-2020, 07:34 AM	#10802
doubleshuffle Unicycle Daredevil Posts: 13,944 Karma: 185432100 Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: Planet of the Pudding Brains Device: Aura HD (R.I.P. After six years the USB socket died.) tolino shine 3	I met a Frenchman in sandals the other day. His name was Philippe Philoppe.

01-07-2020, 06:11 AM	#10803
drjd The Couch Potato Posts: 34,509 Karma: 230999999 Join Date: Aug 2015 Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta	I fear my neighbor may be stalking me, she was googling my name last night on her computer... I saw it clearly through my binoculars!

01-07-2020, 03:26 PM	#10804
Fbone Is that a sandwich? Posts: 8,313 Karma: 103930826 Join Date: Jun 2010 Device: Nook Glowlight Plus	What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.

01-08-2020, 05:30 AM	#10805
drjd The Couch Potato Posts: 34,509 Karma: 230999999 Join Date: Aug 2015 Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta	What sort of television programmes do ducks like? Duckumentaries.

01-09-2020, 05:22 AM	#10806
drjd The Couch Potato Posts: 34,509 Karma: 230999999 Join Date: Aug 2015 Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta	Have you ever tried to eat a clock? It's very time consuming.

01-09-2020, 03:06 PM	#10807
doubleshuffle Unicycle Daredevil Posts: 13,944 Karma: 185432100 Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: Planet of the Pudding Brains Device: Aura HD (R.I.P. After six years the USB socket died.) tolino shine 3	This seems to be making the social media round at the moment, and I really like it: Shakespeare walks into a gay bar. [Exit, pursued by a bear.]

01-10-2020, 05:20 AM	#10808
drjd The Couch Potato Posts: 34,509 Karma: 230999999 Join Date: Aug 2015 Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta	If you see a robbery at an Apple Store. Does that make you an iWitness?

01-11-2020, 05:15 AM	#10809
drjd The Couch Potato Posts: 34,509 Karma: 230999999 Join Date: Aug 2015 Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta	What do you call it when you mix alcohol and American Literature? Tequila Mockingbird.

01-12-2020, 05:08 AM	#10812
drjd The Couch Potato Posts: 34,509 Karma: 230999999 Join Date: Aug 2015 Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta	Is it unlucky to drink on Friday the thirteenth, or is it merely stuporstition?

01-12-2020, 10:22 AM	#10813
Adoby Handy Elephant Posts: 1,737 Karma: 26785684 Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Southern Sweden, far out in the quiet woods Device: Samsung Galaxy Tab S8 Ultra	There is something wrong with the crisps down at the pub. The day after I always get a splitting headache and a dry mouth.

01-14-2020, 01:17 PM	#10814
drjd The Couch Potato Posts: 34,509 Karma: 230999999 Join Date: Aug 2015 Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta	I was asking my friend at what point did Celsius and Fahrenheit become the same. One of my other buddies quickly chimed in, "-40 degrees..." Impressed I said, "I didn't know you were so knowledgeable in weather science?" "I'm not," he said. "But I have been to Minnesota."

01-15-2020, 06:11 AM	#10815
drjd The Couch Potato Posts: 34,509 Karma: 230999999 Join Date: Aug 2015 Device: Kobo Glo, Kobo Touch, Archos 9, Onyx Boox C67ML Carta	Seeing her friend Marcia wearing a new locket, Ashley asks if there is a memento of some sort inside. “Yes,” says Marcia, “a lock of my husband’s hair.” “But Larry’s still alive?” “I know, but his hair is gone.”